Discuss and Rate the Last Film You Watched

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happyninja42

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I like to use this example: say you and I are in a room, and I tell you a woman is about to walk in, and she has the biggest nose, I mean, a HUGE fucking honker; if she looks up you can see straight through to her brain; she blows her nose with a beach towel. I continue on and on like this until she finally walks in; what's the first thing you're going to look at? She could be the most beautiful woman in the world, but your eyes are going straight to her nose to see the flaw for yourself. Never mind if you don't personally think it's *that* big, it'll be under undue scrutiny because I led you down that path with my opinion.
Except you just kind of proved your own point wrong. If I see the thing you blew out of proportion, I'm not going to think it's bad. Sure it's something I was made aware of, because you brought it to my attention. That doesn't mean I'm going to
A) Agree with your assessment of her schnoz.
B) Give a shit if you were even remotely accurate about it being huge, because I don't care about physical variations as much as you do apparently.

Besides, if her nose really was that inhumanely, abnormally big, it would be noticed whether you brought it up or not. That's not "undue scrutiny" , that's a very obvious aspect of the film/nose, god this analogy is weird. Like how it's very blatant in Transformers that Megan Foxx is clearly put on physical display in every frame she's in, for maximum sexuality. Nobody needs anyone to point that out, it's right there, as clear as the nose on your face. Whether that's a PROBLEM, is subjective to the person observing that nose.

Critics would be more accurately framed as saying "So Mrs. GiantSchnoz had a fun personality, engaging her in conversation was overall, enjoyable. I did however find her habit of constantly tapping her manicured nails on her armrest to be slightly distracting, and I personally dislike people who use the word "like" every 3rd word, as a form of verbal super glue to string thoughts together. But, overall, pleasant person to talk to. Yes she has a huge nose but, come on, you don't need ME to tell you that. She knows it, we all know it, but really who cares? She didn't come at me talking about chemtrails and jewish space lasers, so I don't really care if she has a huge nose, in fact I found the way she accessorized it with piercings, and a fake mole just for laughs to be quite engaging. 7/10, would talk to again."
 

BrawlMan

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The problem with a smart zombie is that it loses a lot of characteristic that usefully make zombies distinct and characteristic. Smart zombies may as well be vampires, brainwashed cannibal cultists, people on a rage drug, or some weird genetic / Frankenstein experiment gone wrong.
And yet Return of The Living Dead and the House of the Dead series became successful because of it. There is nothing wrong with smart zombies. I'm not saying every zombie movie has to have smart zombies, but not every single movie or game has to be filled with mindless drones either. Killer 7 is known for its unique take on zombies. The zombies in that game are homicidal/suicidal maniacs who just want to blow others up. They don't care if they succeed or not. Killer Is Dead has supernatural zombies called Wires. Some move slow, many can use weapons, some are fast, and some are gigantic. Mummies are practically supernatural zombies, just more Egyptian and wrapped in bandages. The Mummy movies with Brendan Fraser did something different and nobody complained. Mr X and Nemesis are practically smart zombies. Nemesis can even use weaponry. Yeah, they're technically mutants in certain regards, but their bodies still came from corpses; they just mutated further with the T-virus experimentation. And additionally with a parasite in Nemesis case. If everything was exactly the same, it would be boring. I rather something be different for a change than the same slop over and over. There has to be a lightning strike or a change in ocean waves once in a while.
 
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happyninja42

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And yet Return of The Living Dead and the House of the Dead series became successful because of it. There is nothing wrong with smart zombies. I'm not saying every zombie movie has to have smart zombies, but not every single movie or game has to be filled with mindless drones either. Killer 7 is known for its unique take on zombies. The zombies in that game are homicidal/suicidal maniacs who just want to blow others up. They don't care if they succeed or not. Killer Is Dead as supernatural zombies call Wires. Some slow, many can use weapons, so are fast, and some are gigantic. Mummies are practically supernatural zombies, just more Egyptian and wrapped in bandages. The mummy movies with Brendan Fraser did something different and nobody complained. Mr X and Nemesis are practically smart zombies. Nemesis can even use weaponry. Yeah, they're technically mutants and summer guard, but their body still came from corpses, they just mutated further with t virus experimentation. An additionally with a parasite in Nemesis case. Everything was exactly the same, it would be boring. I rather something be different for a change than the same slop over and over. There has to be a lightning strike or a change in ocean waves once in a while.
I think of that movie Warm Hearts, which had the "mostly dead" variant of the zombies, capable of retaining their intelligence, and eventually overcoming their zombie state to some degree. And the entire idea of them actually having intelligence was a key point of the story, and done pretty well I think. It was funny, but also kind of disturbing.

Also....Land of the Living Dead, did something that pretty much no other film has ever done before, or since...made me empathize with the zombies. That movie opens up with a fully zombified small town, and the zombies are just....shuffling about, like you do. But you clearly see them sort of remembering what they did before. Like one of them is a mechanic at a gas station, and he constantly goes to the pump, and grabs the fuel nozzle, and turns to do.....SOMETHING....but he can't remember what it is. The zombie band continue to flail about on their instruments...because a small portion of their brain still functions enough to remember that, even without context. But it's all very peaceful and calm...an idyllic american morning in small town 'murica in every way....except for the walking corpses. And then, the tranquility is destroyed by a group of survivors, coming through loud and violent, smashing zombies left and right. And their framed like evil vikings, suddenly showing up over the hill to pillage and plunder. And I genuinely cried out in dismay in the theater when I saw that. My gut reaction, was to feel bad for the ZOMBIES. The rest of that film framed them as being still kind of smart, which made it strange for me to root for them to destroy the majority of the survivors.

So I think making zombies smart, CAN be good for a story, if framed well. Most don't bother, and use them as a mindless force of nature to push the plot along. Which is fine I guess. But finding a way to do more with them, I consider that a good thing.

I mean seriously, getting ME, a person with a deep seated dislike of the undead, and how they are commonly used/portrayed in fiction, to feel sad that zombies got killed, with only like 5 minutes of silent screen time. That's some good writing/directing/cinematography in my book.
 
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BrawlMan

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I think of that movie Warm Hearts, which had the "mostly dead" variant of the zombies, capable of retaining their intelligence, and eventually overcoming their zombie state to some degree. And the entire idea of them actually having intelligence was a key point of the story, and done pretty well I think. It was funny, but also kind of disturbing.

Also....Land of the Living Dead, did something that pretty much no other film has ever done before, or sense...made me empathize with the zombies. That movie opens up with a fully zombified small town, and the zombies are just....shuffling about, like you do. But you clearly see them sort of remembering what they did before. Like one of them is a mechanic at a gas station, and he constantly goes to the pump, and grabs the fuel nozzle, and turns to do.....SOMETHING....but he can't remember what it is. The zombie band continue to flail about on their instruments...because a small portion of their brain still functions enough to remember that, even without context. But it's all very peaceful and calm...an idyllic american morning in small town 'murica in every way....except for the walking corpses. And then, the tranquility is destroyed by a group of survivors, coming through loud and violent, smashing zombies left and right. And their framed like evil vikings, suddenly showing up over the hill to pillage and plunder. And I genuinely cried out in dismay in the theater when I saw that. My gut reaction, was to feel bad for the ZOMBIES. The rest of that film framed them as being still kind of smart, which made it strange for me to root for them to destroy the majority of the survivors.

So I think making zombies smart, CAN be good for a story, if framed well. Most don't bother, and use them as a mindless force of nature to push the plot along. Which is fine I guess. But finding a way to do more with them, I consider that a good thing.

I mean seriously, getting ME, a person with a deep seated dislike of the undead, and how they are commonly used/portrayed in fiction, to feel sad that zombies got killed, with only like 5 minutes of silent screen time. That's some good writing/directing/cinematography in my book.
That's what makes George A. Romero's zombie film so awesome. Also, his third zombie movie, Day of the Dead already had one zombie you would empathize with: Bub. Romero just went ahead and took that concept further. Originally, in Day of the Dead, there were going to be even more smart zombies, but he didn't have the budget for it at the time. So, Land of the Dead pretty much takes that concept to further heights.
 
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happyninja42

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That's what makes George A. Romero's zombie film so awesome. Also, his third zombie movie, Day of the Dead already had one zombie you would empathize with: Bub. Romero just went ahead and took that concept further. Originally, in Day of the Dead, there were going to be even more smart zombies, but he didn't have the budget for it at the time. So, Land of the Dead pretty much takes that concept to further heights.
Yeah, I was genuinely pleased for...I think he was called Big Daddy...the zombie who tried to understand how to use a gas pump, when he finally, at the end, got "close enough" by ramming the pump handle through the back window, OVER the nozzle point, and started pumping gas into the car. Which...either was the start of the explosion that ultimately set the whole place on fire, killing the asshole humans. Or set the car's occupants on fire, who were again, asshole humans. His expression of "I get it!! I fucking finally figured it out!!" That hit my soul. It felt like the most annoying musical ear worm, or line from movie, a famous quote, or any number of things that we can sort of remember, but "it's on the tip of our tongue!" Like the name of that song we've been humming for the past 3 days. You can see the video, you can sing the song, you can remember hearing it while driving with a buddy when you were teenagers. But you can't...fucking...remember the NAME!! So yeah, I cheered for that zombie. xD I felt his struggle, and his victory was my victory.

I think it's because that implied they weren't totally mindless husks, so for me personally, that changes the entire equation about what should be done with them. Mindless husks that are nothing but autonomic responses, all geared towards killing humans, that should be purged. Creatures that retain their human memories? That's a whole different moral situation. So yeah, I wasn't on board with just killing them all.
 

Xprimentyl

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Except you just kind of proved your own point wrong.
My point was simply to convey a basic correlation between what you see and what you're told to watch for. However you come out the other end is different for each person. If I "say" she has a big nose, you'll check the size of her nose, not that I'm objectively right or wrong about said size. Critics see films before the rest of us and hint at us as to what they feel we should perceive whereas I'm completely comfortable going into a film without their insight and appreciating it as I see fit.
 

Chimpzy

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Army of the Dead

I liked Snyder's remake of Dawn of the Dead, and the zombie/heist flick combo seemed a novel idea, so I had mildly positive expectations, but no, not feeling this one. Plot points seemingly get set up, but go nowhere. The constant use of licensed pop songs to convey symbolism and emotion in the most obnoxiously on the nose way possible. But the worst parts are when any of the characters open their mouths. So many lines are so bad or their delivery so awkward I was kind of happy when characters got killed because then they'd shut up. All in all, huge fucking meh.
 
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happyninja42

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My point was simply to convey a basic correlation between what you see and what you're told to watch for. However you come out the other end is different for each person. If I "say" she has a big nose, you'll check the size of her nose, not that I'm objectively right or wrong about said size. Critics see films before the rest of us and hint at us as to what they feel we should perceive whereas I'm completely comfortable going into a film without their insight and appreciating it as I see fit.
Yeah prove your point wrong was probably the wrong term, but your analogy isn't great regardless. I don't need you to tell me something about her nose to check it out. I would do that anyway, because I would be looking at her face. In this analogy, the face would be the various, obvious bits about the movie. Of course I'm going to notice her nose, EVERYONE will notice her nose. You didn't make me focus on it or anything. Critics, at least the ones I watch, are more prone to talk about the little things. And, to use this appearance based analogy, it would be things like how her blouse's buttons were off center, making her shirt slightly ajar. Or how it had a little mustard stain on the collar, and that she apparently had a neck tattoo that snaked down into her chest, that hinted at something cool and dangerous with the person, but ultimately didn't lead anywhere in the conversation. Or how she uses the word Like every 3rd word...every....single...sentence.

Now, if you are the kind of person who is easily annoyed/offended, because you are OCD about details like that, then it's useful to listen to other OCD's so that you can, avoid talking to this person. If you're not, and this appearance reviewer ends the critique with "But in the end, despite her scruffy appearance, huge fucking nose, and annoying conversational tic for the word Like, I had a good time talking to her." Then you haven't been ruined in any way. Or at least I haven't been.

If you are the kind of person that gets that worked up over tiny details, well, frankly you were probably going to lose your shit about her nose regardless of me mentioning it or not. And the other details.

I dunno, I dislike the analogy for trying to make your point. :p I mean it's literally a superficial thing that you are using as the comparative analogy. And that's pretty shallow. If that's as far as the movie critic goes with their review, then they aren't a good critic at all, and you shouldn't listen to them regardless of their thoughts on nose size.
 

Johnny Novgorod

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Five Easy Pieces

Never seen it before. Hell of a movie. Nicholson's a beast, Karen Black and Susan Anspach are in a league of their own. It's the kind of movie purely "about the characters" you don't see anymore. Everything has to conform to a package nowadays.
 
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Casual Shinji

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I tried to watch Army of the Dead, and I think I got an hour or so in till my snacks ran out and the movie itself had to entertain me, which it couldn't. Yeah this thing sucks. The set-up is ripe for a fun zombie movie, but the amount of indulgent, icky Zack Snyderisms make that impossible. I mean Christ, it starts out with a loud, asshole newly wed couple, with the woman giving the guy a blowjob while speeding down the road, and then they blow up in a firey explosion. And not long after that we're introduced to a racist, rapey scumbag guard. Jesus Zack, will you ever grow out of your teenage edge phase?

The only good thing I can say is that Tig Notaro (what little of her that I saw) seemed to not get as bogged down by the putridness of this movie. Her performance actually somewhat entertained me.

Zack Snyder's already bad when he's just in the directors chair, but when he takes on the script as well... it's hard to swallow back the bile.
 
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Johnny Novgorod

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The only good thing I can say is that Tig Notaro (what little of her that I saw) seemed to not get as bogged down by the putridness of this movie.
Well she was basically photoshopped into the movie and was as far removed from production as possible, so I'm sure that helped.
 

BrawlMan

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Yeah, I was genuinely pleased for...I think he was called Big Daddy...the zombie who tried to understand how to use a gas pump, when he finally, at the end, got "close enough" by ramming the pump handle through the back window, OVER the nozzle point, and started pumping gas into the car. Which...either was the start of the explosion that ultimately set the whole place on fire, killing the asshole humans. Or set the car's occupants on fire, who were again, asshole humans. His expression of "I get it!! I fucking finally figured it out!!" That hit my soul. It felt like the most annoying musical ear worm, or line from movie, a famous quote, or any number of things that we can sort of remember, but "it's on the tip of our tongue!" Like the name of that song we've been humming for the past 3 days. You can see the video, you can sing the song, you can remember hearing it while driving with a buddy when you were teenagers. But you can't...fucking...remember the NAME!! So yeah, I cheered for that zombie. xD I felt his struggle, and his victory was my victory.

I think it's because that implied they weren't totally mindless husks, so for me personally, that changes the entire equation about what should be done with them. Mindless husks that are nothing but autonomic responses, all geared towards killing humans, that should be purged. Creatures that retain their human memories? That's a whole different moral situation. So yeah, I wasn't on board with just killing them all.
Funny enough I remember a time when I first empathized with zombies in a video game. Albeit, partially. It was towards the end of House of the Dead 3. You're pretty much in the final stretch and you notice the zombies are trying to protect something (The Wheel Of Fate; final boss). The characters even point this out. Hell, one of AMS commandos that were killed in the beginning actually speak and says something to the effect of "we cannot let you pass". It was as if some part of them was still "alive" trying to be useful in some way, and that they knew they were going to die. Maybe I was overthinking it, I don't know. I just know my reaction at the time was the pause the game (I was playing the Wii version), I felt a single tear drop out of my left eye. And I'm like "why the hell am I crying a tear for them?". Maybe I just have a lot of empathy.
 
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happyninja42

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Maybe I just have a lot of empathy.
That certainly helps yes. :D Yeah it's hard to gauge what little things in games or films will trigger an emotional response. I consider those good things. I hardly ever register gameplay mechanics stuff, unless they were just super fucking good and felt satisfying, or really terrible. Otherwise, what I count as good for a game/movie, is if it triggered genuine emotions in me. Making me care about the pixels on the monitor, or the characters being acted out. If you make me feel for them, you've done a good job creator person.
 
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thebobmaster

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Watched a slasher movie by the name of Uncle Sam. This movie was...not good, and not in the fun slasher way. You see, the film itself is about a crazy soldier coming back to life, putting on an Uncle Sam costume, and going around killing unpatriotic people while wearing an Uncle Sam costume on the fourth of July. This sounds like a good, goofy time. Right?

Well, it should be, but the script decided to get really dark. You see, the main character is a kid by the name of Jody who has an unhealthy idolization of his uncle, Sam Harper (yes, this killer zombie is literally Uncle Sam).When I say "unhealthy", he is a preteen who wants to grow up and join the military and become a hero, and in one scene, creates a fake war scene to "kill" his mom's boyfriend because he uses loopholes to get out of paying taxes, which is very unpatriotic. The kid, Jody, even says at one point "I'll do whatever the President says, because he knows better than anyone". While this isn't presented as a good thing, in fact the opposite as the movie goes on, it's just jarring in what should be a goofy movie.

That's still not as jarring, however, as just how vile a character Sam Harper is. You see, the movie flat-out states that he joined the Army so he could get paid to kill people, basically comes out and says he was a wife abuser, and heavily implies (this is dark stuff, hence the blurring) He molested his sister as they were growing up, and she flat-out says that she was happy when he married and moved out "because he'd have someone else to hurt". I remind you, this is a slasher movie with a zombie Uncle Sam killing people for being unpatriotic. It's just...so jarringly unpleasant that I couldn't enjoy the movie, even with some admittedly clever kills and great gore.
 

happyninja42

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Watched a slasher movie by the name of Uncle Sam. This movie was...not good, and not in the fun slasher way. You see, the film itself is about a crazy soldier coming back to life, putting on an Uncle Sam costume, and going around killing unpatriotic people while wearing an Uncle Sam costume on the fourth of July. This sounds like a good, goofy time. Right?

Well, it should be, but the script decided to get really dark. You see, the main character is a kid by the name of Jody who has an unhealthy idolization of his uncle, Sam Harper (yes, this killer zombie is literally Uncle Sam).When I say "unhealthy", he is a preteen who wants to grow up and join the military and become a hero, and in one scene, creates a fake war scene to "kill" his mom's boyfriend because he uses loopholes to get out of paying taxes, which is very unpatriotic. The kid, Jody, even says at one point "I'll do whatever the President says, because he knows better than anyone". While this isn't presented as a good thing, in fact the opposite as the movie goes on, it's just jarring in what should be a goofy movie.

That's still not as jarring, however, as just how vile a character Sam Harper is. You see, the movie flat-out states that he joined the Army so he could get paid to kill people, basically comes out and says he was a wife abuser, and heavily implies (this is dark stuff, hence the blurring) He molested his sister as they were growing up, and she flat-out says that she was happy when he married and moved out "because he'd have someone else to hurt". I remind you, this is a slasher movie with a zombie Uncle Sam killing people for being unpatriotic. It's just...so jarringly unpleasant that I couldn't enjoy the movie, even with some admittedly clever kills and great gore.
Sounds like a brutal deconstruction of the jingo-esque mentality of a lot of the military, conservative right. Pointing out how idiotic their values and priorities are, and how horrible some of them are. Can't say I really find fault in it. I've just met too many asshole veterans with Punisher tattoos in the form of american flags, bleeding into a pool of bullets and blood at the base of it, and a basic "Murica, love it or I'll fuckin' kill yah!" attitude to say it's that unrealistic, in the broad sense. I mean fuck I had to call the cops on a veteran in the first hour of work today, because he was acting like a belligerent nutjob and asshole to our staff. Learned from the cops he's got an open warrant for burglary and arson. So, yeah, don't really it as much of a stretch really.

Sorry it wasn't fun to watch though.
 
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thebobmaster

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Oh, that's very much what it is. I'm not faulting it for the deconstruction, persay. It's just in a very weird area where the script is too dark to laugh at, but the basic concept of the movie is too ridiculous to take seriously, so it felt like the movie was two different visions that never really seemed to know how to mesh.
 
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Thaluikhain

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Well, it should be, but the script decided to get really dark. You see, the main character is a kid by the name of Jody who has an unhealthy idolization of his uncle, Sam Harper (yes, this killer zombie is literally Uncle Sam).When I say "unhealthy", he is a preteen who wants to grow up and join the military and become a hero, and in one scene, creates a fake war scene to "kill" his mom's boyfriend because he uses loopholes to get out of paying taxes, which is very unpatriotic. The kid, Jody, even says at one point "I'll do whatever the President says, because he knows better than anyone". While this isn't presented as a good thing, in fact the opposite as the movie goes on, it's just jarring in what should be a goofy movie.
Don't know about the US Army, but in the Marines "Jody" is the name of the guy who is having sex with your wife/girlfriend while you are deployed. Don't know if that is significant, but thought I'd mention it.
 

Gordon_4

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Don't know about the US Army, but in the Marines "Jody" is the name of the guy who is having sex with your wife/girlfriend while you are deployed. Don't know if that is significant, but thought I'd mention it.
I was under the impression a Jody/Jodi was a song they sang while marching. There are clean ones for when there are more delicate sensibilities around, and then the actual ones.
 

Thaluikhain

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To google!

First result of googling usmc jody is an excerpt from the wikipedia article on Military Cadence:
" In the United States, these cadences are sometimes called jody calls or jodies, after Jody, a recurring character who figures in some traditional cadences; Jody refers to the man with whom a serviceman's wife/girlfriend cheats while he is deployed. "

So it seems we are both correct.
 

Gethsemani

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Army of the Dead Since I am desperate to be part of that conversation. But really, as far as Snyder's body of work goes this is probably my second favorite (Dawn of the Dead is still a great movie and no doubt the best he's made) and the first movie of his I really enjoyed since Watchmen. It has all the hallmarks of a Snyder movie, that doting touch where you can see that he really, really loves the movie he's making and he will drag out shots and scenes, keep scenes in that don't contribute anything just because he likes them and all that juvenile fawning over the military, weapons and rippling muscles.

It is way too long, has way too many twists and crams too much plot into its last 40 minutes. Once the action is over the movie just keeps on going with two endings that could both have been way, way shorter. But I like it anyway. The first 90 minutes (after which I paused to make coffee) have all those excesses but manages to go by really fast. The suspense when they're in Vegas is well maintained and the movie manages to balance between being a heist film and a zombie flick admirably until it ditches all pretense and goes full on action. It is cheesy and corny and full of stuff that can easily break your suspension of disbelief. As a love letter to the zombie genre, though? Nails it.