Discuss and Rate the Last Film You Watched

Is this the first poll?


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BrawlMan

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Ah, but what film is it a reboot of? I've heard people say the Boris Karloff film, but I think it's closer to The Mummy's Hand from 1940, though still very not like that film. To me, it seems to be one of a zillion films in the genre, not a reboot of a particular one, as far as I can see.

(I liked the first 2 of those Mummy films, not seen all of the 3rd one, the first Scorpion King is ok, the next 4 not so much).

And I'm not seeing The Thing as a reboot, rather a re-adaption, but that's semantics.
@happyninja42 said reboot or remakes. I never once implied John Carpenter's The thing is a reboot. I was just making a list of movies that were reboots or remakes.

As far as The Mummy goes, what is a remake of is your interpretation, but it still counts as a reboot. They took the title character, and put it in, a new at the time, completely different direction. Making it more like an adventure serial in Indiana Jones type show.
 
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Casual Shinji

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I saw The Mitchels vs. The Machines and it was pretty good.

It can sometimes lean toward the Dreamworks 'ain't we hip' cringe comedy a tad, but overall it was a really fun movie. There were a good deal of jokes where I rewinded because I wanted to hear them again, and in that case a comedy always gets a seal of approval from me. Olivia Coleman as the villian was a stand-out.
 

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Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales (6/10)

Up to (finally) seeing this film, I stated that POTC was a case of a series where every film was worse than the one preceeding it. The good news is that Dead Men breaks this trend. The bad news is that doesn't make the film "good" itself. As far as rankings go, it's now a case of 1>2>5>3>4. As far as this film goes?

Well, the odd thing about Dead Men is that it's kind of an amalgamation of every POTC film that's gone before, putting those elements in a blender, and making good elements worse, and bad elements better. What do I mean about this? Well:

-Henry and Carina are to this film what Will and Elizabeth were to the first - boy and girl finding 'true wuv' over the course of events, with Jack being well aware of the proverbial cherubs. So on one hand, it does a worse job than the first film, because they're not quite as compelling. On the other, it's a much, MUCH better job than the likes of...person and mermaid girl in film 4 (then again, most romances are).

-Salazar and the Mary are to this film what Davy Jones and the Dutchman were to film 2. Salazar and Jones both come after Jack, both do so in a magic ship, and both have an army of ghosts/fish people. So on one hand, Salazar isn't a bad antagonist - his motivations make sense, his anti-priacy crusade gives him some nuance, the actor does a great job, etc. On the other hand, he's a pale, um, ghost, of Jones and the Dutchman. And even in the realm of naval officers pursuing Jack, he's no Norrington. Furthermore, while I don't really care that much how magic works in this setting, why Salazar and hsi crew became ghosts is never explained (unlike film 1), and while like Jones Salazar can't walk on land (unlike the Dutchman crew, his men can't either), it's never explained why, nor is there any thematic depth to it. He can't walk on land, because if he could, the protagonists would be dead.

-The Trident of Poseidon is a blatant McGuffin, thta like the Fountain of Youth, is one that's not only pursued by the protagonists, but also an imperial power (the British rather than the Spanish). On the other hand, it works better here in that there's more reason to be invested here in Henry using it to free Will rather than the whole Blackbeard immortality stuff that I just don't care about.

-The finale is akin to film 3, only instead of a giant whirlpool that ships mustn't fall into, it's a parting of the sea that a ship mustn't fall into. So while it's not as epic, that's arguably a good thing, since film 3 was far too big and bloated for its own good.

-Jack is less agile than he was in previous films, but it's arguably part of the point, so while Depp kind of comes off as sleepwalking at times, it does fit the character. Though since Jack has given the compass to people before, why wasn't Salazar freed then?

There's other things I could mention, but it's kind of telling how this is, as of this writing, the last POTC film, and it feels like a book-ender to a series by incorporating elements from across all of it. At the end of the day, though, it's...fine. That's really all I can say. It's an adventure romp that had some laughs from me, some eyerolls (the shotgun wedding scene...ugh...), some stunts that had me feeling like a kid again (e.g. the entire bank heist scene), while others were just a CGI fest (the final battle). Considering how Jack's lost its mojo, it's fair to say that the film series had clearly lost its mojo at this point as well. However, it's easily a better note to go out on than Stranger Tides, so there is that.
 
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Johnny Novgorod

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Two Distant Strangers

Won Best Short Film at the Oscars this year. Black man gets George Floyd'd by cops, wakes up the next morning, discovers he's trapped in a time loop in which he gets killed over and over no matter what he does differently - to the point of nightmarish absurdity, wherein lies the social commentary. This is basically Groundhog Day for a black man, a concept already explored in Groundhog Day for A Black Man, which came out 5 years ago. Director's accusing Netflix of plagiarism but I doubt that Youtuber v The Largest Media Corporation will go anywhere. And to be fair... it's such an obvious concept, it's barely worth making the movie. It feels more like a PSA than a movie (like that other one about the guy getting catcalled and harrassed by women), and doesn't even have the cinematic veneer of a Black Mirror or Twilight Zone. In any other year this wouldn't even have been nominated.
 

Xprimentyl

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Man Mortal Kombat 1995 still holds up. Obviously blows the 2021 out of the water.
Haven't seen the 2021 version, but the 1995 MK movies was terrible. It was just fan service drenched in cheese and camp, and it's lack of self-awareness doesn't even allow it to cross into "so bad, it's good" territory. Movies based on video games are always going to be hard to pull off, but when you make one based on a 2-player fighting game that has a razor thin "story" at best, just... no. Makes me wonder why they thought "y'know what? It's been 25 years since that was awful; we should do it again."
 

Gordon_4

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Haven't seen the 2021 version, but the 1995 MK movies was terrible. It was just fan service drenched in cheese and camp, and it's lack of self-awareness doesn't even allow it to cross into "so bad, it's good" territory. Movies based on video games are always going to be hard to pull off, but when you make one based on a 2-player fighting game that has a razor thin "story" at best, just... no. Makes me wonder why they thought "y'know what? It's been 25 years since that was awful; we should do it again."
You know the only reason Mortal Kombat works at all is that the ultra-violence is paired with cheesy camp right? Also, lacks self awareness? Have you fucking watched it lately? Because I watched it month ago and the amount of winking to camera this movie does with Raiden alone is astonishing. MK95 worked because the movie was serious when it mattered - the fights - but the rest of it, everyone knew what movie they were in. Cary Tagawa probably saved them money on set disposal because the ************ kept eating them with all the scenery chewing he was doing. And you know what? Those big scenes in the trailer with Scorpion and Sub-Zero announcing themselves are so goddamn awful its almost laughable. Somehow being introduced as Shang Tsung's bitches on his boat to a decent music track and just silently taking a fighting stance was better than a movie where the two are meant to be fully fledged characters.
 

BrawlMan

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Haven't seen the 2021 version, but the 1995 MK movies was terrible. It was just fan service drenched in cheese and camp, and it's lack of self-awareness doesn't even allow it to cross into "so bad, it's good" territory. Movies based on video games are always going to be hard to pull off, but when you make one based on a 2-player fighting game that has a razor thin "story" at best, just... no. Makes me wonder why they thought "y'know what? It's been 25 years since that was awful; we should do it again."
Hard disagree. The 1995 Mortal Kombat film is awesome for a reason. Despite the lack of gore, I never noticed until way afterward. The movie had awesome fight scenes, characters, and charisma. Everybody knew exactly what they were in for. The story was straight, simple, and went to the point. That's why it worked. Annihilation on the other hand, is a bag of donkey dicks.
 

Xprimentyl

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You know the only reason Mortal Kombat works at all is that the ultra-violence is paired with cheesy camp right? Also, lacks self awareness? Have you fucking watched it lately? Because I watched it month ago and the amount of winking to camera this movie does with Raiden alone is astonishing. MK95 worked because the movie was serious when it mattered - the fights - but the rest of it, everyone knew what movie they were in. Cary Tagawa probably saved them money on set disposal because the ************ kept eating them with all the scenery chewing he was doing. And you know what? Those big scenes in the trailer with Scorpion and Sub-Zero announcing themselves are so goddamn awful its almost laughable. Somehow being introduced as Shang Tsung's bitches on his boat to a decent music track and just silently taking a fighting stance was better than a movie where the two are meant to be fully fledged characters.
Hard disagree. The 1995 Mortal Kombat film is awesome for a reason. Despite the lack of gore, I never noticed until way afterward. The movie had awesome fight scenes, characters, and charisma. Everybody knew exactly what they were in for. The story was straight, simple, and went to the point. That's why it worked. Annihilation on the other hand, is a bag of donkey dicks.
We can agree to disagree. Yes, the fight scenes were nice, but the cheesy glue holding everything between them together was just painful to watch. No, I've not watched it SINCE '95 probably, but I recall, even at the tender age of 15, recognizing that nearly every scene between the fights was cringe-worthy, Sonya's character in particular was horrid.
 

happyninja42

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Haven't seen the 2021 version, but the 1995 MK movies was terrible. It was just fan service drenched in cheese and camp, and it's lack of self-awareness doesn't even allow it to cross into "so bad, it's good" territory. Movies based on video games are always going to be hard to pull off, but when you make one based on a 2-player fighting game that has a razor thin "story" at best, just... no. Makes me wonder why they thought "y'know what? It's been 25 years since that was awful; we should do it again."
Partly because a not insignificant portion of the fanbase, and just people in general, genuinely feel the movie is pretty good for what it's actually trying to do. Sure, you can say "the bar is really fucking low" when talking about video game movies, or 90's action movies, but I think it's a pretty good film. It knows what it is, what the source material is, it doesn't take itself too seriously, but also applies enough depth and drama to the characters when needed to have an impact. The acting isn't great, but basically no action/kung fu movies of that era had good acting, because they got C-D list actors, and martial artists with no real acting background. But they did what they could with what they had, and yes it's not an amazing film, but it's genuine, earnest, and fun as hell to watch. I don't consider it a "guilty" pleasure at all, it's just a pleasure. I saw it in the theaters when it first released, and have loved it ever since.

You know the only reason Mortal Kombat works at all is that the ultra-violence is paired with cheesy camp right? Also, lacks self awareness? Have you fucking watched it lately? Because I watched it month ago and the amount of winking to camera this movie does with Raiden alone is astonishing. MK95 worked because the movie was serious when it mattered - the fights - but the rest of it, everyone knew what movie they were in. Cary Tagawa probably saved them money on set disposal because the ************ kept eating them with all the scenery chewing he was doing. And you know what? Those big scenes in the trailer with Scorpion and Sub-Zero announcing themselves are so goddamn awful its almost laughable. Somehow being introduced as Shang Tsung's bitches on his boat to a decent music track and just silently taking a fighting stance was better than a movie where the two are meant to be fully fledged characters.
Yeah, introducing Scorpion and SZ as mind controlled slaves to his will, was a really good way to hammer that home. Yes, the real impact of it is lost on anyone not familiar with the games and the rivalry set up between those two, but for the fans it does come across to illustrate how dangerous Shang Tsung is.
 

BrawlMan

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We can agree to disagree. Yes, the fight scenes were nice, but the cheesy glue holding everything between them together was just painful to watch. No, I've not watched it SINCE '95 probably, but I recall, even at the tender age of 15, recognizing that nearly every scene between the fights was cringe-worthy, Sonya's character in particular was horrid.
That's part of the problem. I've seen Mortal Kombat '95 more than I care to count. For the record, I was 6 years old when the movie came out. Yes, it has some cheese in it, but that doesn't make it automatically bad or super cringey. I swear the word cringe has gotten thrown around too much lately and is used for a catch-all term for anything cheesy or bad. The movie has heart and was honest about what it wanted to do. Also, there were a couple of tears jerking moments for me in the movie. Mainly the ending after Shang Tsung is defeated. And Chan appears one more time in front of Liu to say goodbye.
 
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happyninja42

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That's part of the problem. I've seen Mortal Kombat '95 more than I care to count. For the record, I was 6 years old when the movie came out. Yes, it has some cheese in it, but that doesn't make it automatically bad or super cringey. I swear the word cringe has gotten thrown around too much lately and is used for a catch-all term for anything cheesy or bad. The movie has heart and was honest about what it wanted to do. Also, there were a couple of tears jerking moments for me in the movie. Mainly the ending after Shang Tsung is defeated. And Chan appears one more time in front of Liu to say goodbye. .
While I agree, @Xprimentyl is correct that Sonya's acting is really bad. It is. But again, it's a martial arts film from the 90s. None of them had good acting.
 
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BrawlMan

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While I agree, @Xprimentyl is correct that Sonya's acting is really bad. It is. But again, it's a martial arts film from the 90s. None of them had good acting.
As far as Sonya's actress goes....she's fine. I'm not saying hers was the best or anything, but it was decent. Besides, with so many later video game movies that came out, most of them have worse acting than whatever she did.
 

happyninja42

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As far as Sonya's actress goes....she's fine. I'm not saying hers was the best or anything, but it was decent. Besides, with so many later video game movies that came out, most of them have worse acting than whatever she did.
I'm not talking about other films, I just mean in the confines of MK '95, she was definitely the weakest acting performance. Too serious to enjoy how cheesy her acting was, not serious enough to actually care about her motivations. I think she got better as the film progressed, and they softened up her Tough Girl persona. But when she's being all "I'm a tough woman! I don't need no man! I just need to kill Kano! There's only one person I trust...and you're looking at her!" Yeah she's pretty bad. When she puts that aside, she gets better, but she also has a massive reduction in dialogue at that point, and is mostly restricted to rolling her eyes at Johnny from the sidelines, and saying one line here and there. In fact most of her dialogue are single lines at most, and the other 2 of the trio would say much longer lines, and she would one line reply. I think it's just a fact that she wasn't really a great actress at that time. A quick imdb of her work history, and MK '95 is very close to the start of it. She had some tv spots here and there, she was in billy madison, but...I mean that's not a good indication of acting skill, an Adam Sandler film.

I'm not holding it against her, she was fairly new apparently, but given she hasn't really done a whole lot in the industry, I'm guessing she's just not the greatest of actors. Which is fine, it's statistically impossible to having nothing but A-listers. She is still noticeably bad in MK '95
 

BrawlMan

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I'm not talking about other films, I just mean in the confines of MK '95, she was definitely the weakest acting performance.
I know. I was just giving my own opinion on the matter. Nothing more.


There's only one person I trust...and you're looking at her!" Yeah she's pretty bad.
Tell that to my older brother. He still quotes that line. But not the one he quotes the most.
 

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"That was a $500 pair of sunglasses you broke asshole" ? Is that the one he does the most?
It's either that or "This is where you fall down.",as far as Johnny Cage is concerned. I'll have to get back to him on that. I know he quoted Raiden and Shang Tsung lines the most when we were kids. And he would still do it plenty of times in his adulthood.
 

happyninja42

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It's either that or "This is where you fall down.",as far as Johnny Cage is concerned. I'll have to get back to him on that. I know he quoted Raiden and Shang Tsung lines the most when we were kids. And he would still do it plenty of times in his adulthood.
Yeah, I love This is where you fall down. I also love "She went this way..." *moves a metric ton of clearly undisturbed spiderwebs from years of accumulation* "I can smell her perfume" *taps nose*

I also love the shit eating grin Liu Kang has on his face when he taps Johnny on the shoulder after the crashes and burns with that pickup line to Sonya. Or Johnny's line where he summarizes about why they should acknowledge their victory "We're standing...they're not...what more do you want?" and Raiden's genuine slow clap of approval. Then him pointing "What will you do about...them?" *cut to metric ton of extras shouting and ready to fight* "Ah ah..." *Raiden holds up finger and lets a spark show up* *Mook army remembers he's a fucking god and will murderize them, back up* "I believe you'll find the exit is...." *walks through the mook army* "This way..."

Just, so many gems of genuine cheesy comedy gold in that film.
 
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thebobmaster

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"Liu, I hate this place. I'm telling you, I hate it. I'm in a hostile environment, I'm completely unprepared, and I'm surrounded by people who probably wanna kick my ass. It's like being back in high school!"
 

happyninja42

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"Liu, I hate this place. I'm telling you, I hate it. I'm in a hostile environment, I'm completely unprepared, and I'm surrounded by people who probably wanna kick my ass. It's like being back in high school!"
Hehehe, yeah, Johnny was really great in that film. Annoying enough to be the obnoxious movie star, but also human enough to be relatable and still have you like him. I need to see if that guy did anything else.

*Edit* Looks like he pretty much stayed a tv actor, with the occasional movie here and there. Definitely kept busy though. Good for him.
 
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