Sure, here's my tip: find a group that plays 3.5. Much better than 4th edition.
OK, here's some real advice- while munchikins/powergamers are lame, it is possible to maximise your potential without being exploitative. In my experience the secrets to success in a tabletop RPG are multipliers and controlling fate.
First, multipliers. My current character is a 3rd level Bard. We had an adventure where we led a reasonable-sized army of peasant militia with a couple of NPC class characters, a moderate-level cleric and a high level (but rather aged) dwarven fighter against an entire HORDE of orcs, including a warlord, shaman, 2 ogres and an elite division of black orcs. We got some support from some surprisingly competent goblins who the orcs were oppressing, but possibly the most significant thing any one of us did in the whole battle was right at the start where I cast the level 1 spell 'Inspirational Boost' and began singing at the top of my lungs to use my Inspire Courage ability. With the bonus from Inspirational Boost (+1 to the effects of Inspire Courage) I was functioning as the equivalent of a level eight Bard, giving +2 to all to hit rolls, damage rolls and to saving throws against Charm and Fear to every ally in the army. Given the difference in power between a peasant and the common orc, this made a HUGE difference. Normally my ability only affects 5 characters as we're a 5-man party. In this case, it was more than ten times as effective.
Another aspect of multipliers: my bard is a half-elf with 6 ranks in Diplomacy, Bluff and Sense Motive. Know what that means? Including my 18 charisma, my racial bonus and the 2 synergy bonuses I get for having 5 ranks in Bluff and Sense Motive, I get a bonus of +16 to my Diplomacy checks despite only being level 3. I can generally talk my way out of any situation where someone isn't immediately trying to kill me (the character type is commonly known as a Diplo-sniper). And the best thing is I don't even have to be powergamer-style cheap to do it- it's a simple and perfectly reasonable skill combination that can produce AMAZING results. All I had to do was look for the bonuses.
Finally, fate manipulation. You know what the single most powerful ability in a tabletop RPG is? The ability to reroll dice. One annoying limitation of RPGs is that it doesn't matter HOW good you are, how smart your decisions are, how prudent or cautious you are, your fate is ultimately in the hands of the dice. If you try to jump a 6-foot gap over a bottomless ravine and you roll a natural 1, it doesn't matter if your character is so agile they could dance on the head of a pin, you plummet to your doom. One of the best spells in 3.5 is a 3rd level spell called 'Alter Fortune'. For the cost of 200 exp, you can cause ANY creature within close range (friend or foe) to reroll one die. Whether your party fighter charges with his last strength to deal the deathblow that will kill the necromancer and dispel his ghoulish army only to flub his attack roll, or whether the enemy rolls JUST enough damage to knock you unconscious at the very worst moment, this is an example of a spell which can literally save entire campaigns. It's not the only spell that can do so either- any spell or effect that gives you a second chance to be saved from your own dice-rolling incompotence is worth 10 times its weight in gold.
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