Does this happen to everybody?

[Lazy]

I'm not a particularly busy person. I work seven days a week, but only for about four to five hours a day, and that's right in the morning so I'll often have the entire day to myself to think. My mind wanders towards philosophical topics big and small, and I'll drift off for hours sometimes.

Then, I open my big stupid mouth and it's like it all immediately escapes out my gob, and I'm left stumbling over words with nothing to say.

The written word isn't much better, either. For all the time I've spent reflecting on the comments and arguments I read on this site, reviewing my own personal stance on things and carefully wording my thoughts, it all evaporates the moment I'm sitting in front of a keyboard. I post pretty rarely for this very reason; I don't want to get involved in conversations or debates because I always leave feeling the same way: defeated and stupid.

Does this happen to everybody? How do you deal with it?

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

The written word isn't much better, either. For all the time I've spent reflecting on the comments and arguments I read on this site, reviewing my own personal stance on things and carefully wording my thoughts, it all evaporates the moment I'm sitting in front of a keyboard. I post pretty rarely for this very reason; I don't want to get involved in conversations or debates because I always leave feeling the same way: defeated and stupid.

Does this happen to everybody? How do you deal with it?

You learn by losing. I've gotten ripped a new one of this site a few times and I don't feel bad about it because I come out of the situation more knowledgeable than I was before. There are so many people from so many different countries here, having conversations with them is a great way to broaden your perspective and forget about those nasty stereotypes. I might feel defeated, but I most certainly don't feel stupid.

I personally don't like debating because one side or both tend to get offended and the whole thing turns into a giant argument, which is counter productive, but I love conversations, where both sides are on friendly terms and no one is trying to "win".

 

[Zhukov]

Uh... no.

I can generally express my thoughts without trouble.

You just start with a broad statement of your position then elaborate from there.

Granted, it's harder using speech when you kind of have to construct arguments on the fly. Text is easy though since you have all the time you want.

 

[Rose and Thorn]

I have no problem talking about what I am thinking, but I do often feel I speak my mind to much and let people know more about me then I really want them too.

Sometimes I'll end up kicking myself because of telling someone a secret of mine only to later think it over and realise I only told them because I wanted to talk about it, they probably don't care and I don't really want them to know.

So now a days I only talk when spoken to or if I have something important to say. I tend to post my most personal stuff on the escapist these days.

 

[Dead Seerius]

There have been a few times where I couldn't quite put my thoughts into spoken words on the fly, but if I'm writing my opinion on a forum or text I can usually get it out alright.

Usually when I'm having a friendly argument in person I'm thinking while I'm talking, which sometimes leads to a bit of stumbling.

 

[King Billi]

I'm not a particularly busy person. I work seven days a week, but only for about four to five hours a day, and that's right in the morning so I'll often have the entire day to myself to think. My mind wanders towards philosophical topics big and small, and I'll drift off for hours sometimes.

Then, I open my big stupid mouth and it's like it all immediately escapes out my gob, and I'm left stumbling over words with nothing to say.

The written word isn't much better, either. For all the time I've spent reflecting on the comments and arguments I read on this site, reviewing my own personal stance on things and carefully wording my thoughts, it all evaporates the moment I'm sitting in front of a keyboard. I post pretty rarely for this very reason; I don't want to get involved in conversations or debates because I always leave feeling the same way: defeated and stupid.

Does this happen to everybody? How do you deal with it?

I think I understand what you're saying here and if I'm right then I do agree.

Sometimes no matter how sure I am in my opinion on a topic it just dosen't come out as strong as I'd like when I speak or write it down.

I think its just because once an opinion is spoken out loud it becomes somewhat muted by context and reality whereas an intangiable thought can have limitless potential and relevance when it's not boiled down to specifics..?

Hmm? Take what I've just said as an example. This honestly seemed like a really interesting idea in my head but now that I've committed it to words it suddenly seems awfully trite and pretentious.

 

[Ljs1121]

I'm absolutely terrible about this. Regardless of who I'm arguing against, I cannot do it.

I'm already a stuttering mess in real life as it is. There's no reason to further complicate my speech by mixing in controversial topics.

As for the Internet, it's easy enough to just stay out of such discussions and focus on fun, uplifting things.

 

[MeChaNiZ3D]

It happens to me often, I have to have a good long argument over the topic about 3 times before I have my opinions straight. And expressing concepts like the feeling you have when you realise how strange it is that everything exists and why there are properties such as solidity and temperature and why there are five senses in a concise form - "Why are things as they are and not otherwise" - also takes some doing.

 

[Sewa_Yunga]

Spoiler: snip

I'm not a particularly busy person. I work seven days a week, but only for about four to five hours a day, and that's right in the morning so I'll often have the entire day to myself to think. My mind wanders towards philosophical topics big and small, and I'll drift off for hours sometimes.

Then, I open my big stupid mouth and it's like it all immediately escapes out my gob, and I'm left stumbling over words with nothing to say.

The written word isn't much better, either. For all the time I've spent reflecting on the comments and arguments I read on this site, reviewing my own personal stance on things and carefully wording my thoughts, it all evaporates the moment I'm sitting in front of a keyboard. I post pretty rarely for this very reason; I don't want to get involved in conversations or debates because I always leave feeling the same way: defeated and stupid.

Does this happen to everybody? How do you deal with it?

Yep, I know that feel. I mean, look at my post count and join date
Spoken conversations work better for me, since when I try to write about anything I tend to think ->type ->read ->think over ->delete ->rethink ->type again ->send (or not).[footnote]This description has gone through at least three of these cycles [footnote]this footnote through two[/footnote][/footnote]
However when I talk, I naturally can't delete what I just said, so I either try to clarify what I actually meant, or when I'm having a bad day in this regard I keep on thinking (and possibly entangling myself in different phrasings), while muttering a simple "hmm" without saying anything useful at all.

I've had real problems in school because of that too; my grades plummeted whenever there were written exams involved. What little I wrote had nigh-perfect grammar and spelling though.

 

[Daaaah Whoosh]

The problem with philosophy is that it requires precise definitions, and in regular conversations, almost all the words we use have loose definitions. Trying to get a philosophical idea across without any misunderstandings requires a lot of luck, or a lot of work. It makes perfect sense that you have such difficulty expressing your thoughts in a way that others can understand.

 

[Frezzato]

I'm not a particularly busy person. I work seven days a week, but only for about four to five hours a day, and that's right in the morning so I'll often have the entire day to myself to think. My mind wanders towards philosophical topics big and small, and I'll drift off for hours sometimes.

Then, I open my big stupid mouth and it's like it all immediately escapes out my gob, and I'm left stumbling over words with nothing to say.

The written word isn't much better, either. For all the time I've spent reflecting on the comments and arguments I read on this site, reviewing my own personal stance on things and carefully wording my thoughts, it all evaporates the moment I'm sitting in front of a keyboard. I post pretty rarely for this very reason; I don't want to get involved in conversations or debates because I always leave feeling the same way: defeated and stupid.

Does this happen to everybody? How do you deal with it?

Are you a student? You sound like a student. I don't mean that in a negative way, seeing how going to school to better yourself is a good thing. So are you a student?

 

[Casual Shinji]

The solution is not minding coming across as stupid sometimes, because it's going to happen once in a while anyway.

It's better to have conversed and sounded stupid, then never to have conversed at all.

 

[CrimsonBlaze]

It sometimes happens to me, the lack of expressing or retaining certain thoughts leave us the second we want to verbalize or write them down.

I tend to usually just wait a few minutes, try to think back to key points that I made, and just write down/say those key points. Eventually, it will come back to me and I might even have better thoughts that I had not previously considered.

I say that it gets easier over time, and practice is key.

 

[Rawne1980]

Never have a problem getting out what I need to say.

Sometimes i'm wrong and some dick .. er .. kind, yes that's what I meant, kind .. person corrects me.

The trick is to not let it bother you if you're wrong or if someone disagrees. You won't be right all the time and there are some people on this site that THINK they know far more than they actually do, so some folk will disagree with you sometimes.