Don't know what to say

[Girl With One Eye]

My boyfriends best friend(who is also one of my friends) mum passed away a few days ago. Its my boyfriends birthday today so it is likely I will be seeing him later. I'm just not sure if I should mention his mum? Should I say something like "I'm sorry to hear what happened" or is it best not to bring it up at all?

Any comments are much appreciated.

 

[Vryyk]

Maybe don't bring it up in case it's something he'd rather not think about it.

Perhaps just buy him something small like an energy drink he likes and say something nice to him? Don't underestimate how much those little things matter to people. Especially in times like that.

 

[rutger5000]

Give him a good hug. That's really all you can do if he doesn't want to talk about it. It shows that he can talk about it, but doesn't need to. Sometimes talking is overrated and you need different kinds of communication.
Another guy mentioned small gestures like buying him a drink or something. That could work, but I still would go with a hug. It just means and says more.

 

[zombiesinc]

My boyfriends best friend(who is also one of my friends) mum passed away a few days ago. Its my boyfriends birthday today so it is likely I will be seeing him later. I'm just not sure if I should mention his mum? Should I say something like "I'm sorry to hear what happened" or is it best not to bring it up at all?

Any comments are much appreciated.

If he's your friend, regardless of the environment, give him a hug and let him know you're there if he ever needs anything. I don't think ignoring it is a good idea. Although bringing it up may make him uncomfortable, ignoring the reality simply because you're both at a party, isn't going to do anything for him in the long run. Even if he chooses to ignore it himself, doesn't mean it's okay, or in his best interest. You don't have to say anything beyond "I'm sorry", and ultimately, that moment of discomfort, embarrassment, or sadness will be far outweighed by the moment of relief, gratitude and comfort.

 

[dmase]

I think if its your bf birthday and there is more than just that one friend there someone else will bring it up. I know its hard to bring something like that up, so just follow someone else's lead.

 

[Slippers]

From someone who has lost a parent.

Do not ask how are you with pitiful eyes.
Do not offer your full fledging support.
DO not mention it, just have fun.

I fully understand that you want to show him, that he can rely on you. So give him that, which he needs the most of, fun.

He's been hearing condolences for the last few days, he needs to do something to get loose. Believe me, there's nothing more depressing in ones life, than hearing "I'm sorry about that" for a few days straight.

 

[lemiel14n3]

Yeah, I wouldn't bring it up. There's really no words that you can say to make this better, right now the best thing for him is a friend, no a guy who pitys him. Take your time, wait for him to talk to you.

 

[Ramin 123]

Maybe don't bring it up in case it's something he'd rather not think about it.

Perhaps just buy him something small like an energy drink he likes and say something nice to him? Don't underestimate how much those little things matter to people. Especially in times like that.

An energy drink...? I'm sorry but I pissed myself laughing when I seen that. Oh man..(btw I'm not being a dick, I just thought that was hilarious)

(To O.P)Well it depends on how close you are to him, if you are proper friends say "I'm sorry to hear about it, hug him etc (make sure to tell your bf in case he thinks you're shifting his friend). But if you aren't that close, just don't bother mentioning it or be horrible like me and not go near him (if it was someone I didn't know I wouldn't bother).