Escapist Sentence Generator

[wesdabigman]

I violently attacked Agent 47 and the sounds of their screams is comforting and assuring.

 

[TheGhostOfSin]

I made an ill-advised pass at Tails but it doesn't stop the voices, oh no, it doesn't stop them at all...

Yes I know I sort of cheated and used G instead of T but get over it.

 

[Rabid Toilet]

I went shopping with Jill Valentine, however, it tasted like almonds, so I'll never do it again.

What shopping trip did we go on?

 

[Corven]

I went to the movies with Tommy Vercetti and we found out that watermelons just won't flush down the toilet.

 

[The Iron Ninja]

I kissed Ryu Hayabusa... It's been three years and they still haven't let me go.

I hate Ninja Gaiden.

 

[smallharmlesskitten]

I got drunk with Chun Li and to my surprise I was overcome with Pixie Power

 

[Lord Krunk]

I cried with Buzz Lightyear.

And I'd do it again, but with feeling.

That's awesome.

 

[Cpt. Red]

I cried with Tom Nook and I'd do it again to, but with feeling...

Does that mean that I am emo?

 

[Piemaster]

I played strip poker with Tony Hawk and I swear they looked like that before I met them.

What happened during that game?

 

[Mr. Squirrel]

I played strip poker with Mario, but they wouldn't stop touching me in my private places

 

[000Ronald]

OK, OK...I made an ill advised pass at myself; that still doesn't change the fact that IT'S BEEN THREE MOTHERFUCKING YEARS AND THEY STILL HAVEN'T LET ME GO!

See, it's much more fun if you put your own little spin on it. Or that's what I think.

Apologies if you see this now and are slapping yourself in the head; you deserve it, but still...

 

[Hellion25]

OK, OK...I made an ill advised pass at myself; that still doesn't change the fact that IT'S BEEN THREE MOTHERFUCKING YEARS AND THEY STILL HAVEN'T LET ME GO!

See, it's much more fun if you put your own little spin on it. Or that's what I think.

Apologies if you see this now and are slapping yourself in the head; you deserve it, but still...

Damn you found a flaw in the generator. I shall do nothing about it because I am lazy.

And go for it if you wanna put your own spin on it. Tis all just for shits and giggles anyways.

 

[Xhumed]

I went shopping with Jill Valentine, however, it tasted like almonds, so I'll never do it again.

What shopping trip did we go on?

Dali-Mart?

 

[Jobz]

I played strip poker with Yoshi and now my training is complete.

Gotta love that little green lizard.

 

[ThePoodonkis]

I cried with Sonic the Hedgehog... it's been three years and they still haven't let me go.

 

[Easykill]

I'm having more fun reading these than I have any right to. Trying to rationalize them is just awesome.

I went to a movie with Princess Zelda and my insurance premiums went through the roof.

Now for the rationalization; the chances that she'll be kidnapped at the movie is crazy high, and the chances that I'll die in said kidnapping are also high. The insurance company thus decided that dating Zelda was a liability and raised my insurance rates. See? Made sense.

 

[Hellion25]

Yeah try rationlizing the one where the guy made a pass at himself and ending up kidnapping himself for three years. It hurts my brain trying to make sense of that.

 

[Easykill]

That's easy, I have two. One, he just gets locked up in a mental hospital. Two, he's the Logician so he somehow bends reality so there's two of him. He then is captured and tortured/vivisected for three years.

 

[the monopoly guy]

I cried with Alex Kidd... it's been three years and they still haven't let me go

EDIT: Damn you Poodonkis! Damn yoooooou!

 

[000Ronald]

Yeah try rationlizing the one where the guy made a pass at himself and ending up kidnapping himself for three years. It hurts my brain trying to make sense of that.

That's easy, I have two. One, he just gets locked up in a mental hospital. Two, he's the Logician so he somehow bends reality so there's two of him. He then is captured and tortured/vivisected for three years.

Actually, I was imagining myself looking in a mirror, making a pass at myself in the mirror, and then getting locked up in an insane assylum for three motherfucking years because my family got tired of my bullshit.

I have a very active imagination.