I have one of those big families which kind of spread all over the town like some kind of weird ant colony. My dad has eight siblings, and was/is close to all his uncles, aunts, cousins, etc. A relative passed away recently, one of my dads uncles (please; no condolence, mid-ninties is a fantastic achievement to unlock, at least 500 points!) He never married and had no children, his only next of kin being a half-sister that nobody even knew existed until after the Grim Reaper laid a bony hand on his shoulder. This tragic event has inevitably sparked much misery with our family, although, I suspect, not the kind of misery one would expect. No tears of sadness have been shed, no laments for the words unsaid, no words to honour he who is dead. Being like most large familes when faced with such a loss, my family honour the dead in the only dignified way they know how - by having a massive fight over what he left behind while his corpse cools quietly in its box.
He was fairly well off and left quite a wad of cash lying around. In fact many of the family suspected he had quite a few bob while he was still alive. To this end, one of my aunts and her husband, the family vultures, swooped in and started to take care of him when he started to get a bit peakey. When I was a kid I really doubted the conspiracy theories that my dad used to propogate about these two individuals, but this is the third such relative who they have done this too.
They are now extremely pissed off, because he didn't leave a will, the executor of his estate has expressed intention to divide up the inheritance evenly between everyone. But, says my aunt and her husband, they "invested" in his care, and as such have a greater claim to the money (and his property, a fairly decent house) than anyone else. My dads response has been measured and dignified - he compared his sister to Dr Shipman, and asked her if she merely ministers to the dead or helps borderline cases along. Thus a family-wide shouting match has begun, and promises to get really juicy too.
I suggested to my dad that they should just give the lot to charity, and in any event both him and my aunt are both on the graveyard side of 60, and so don't have enough time left for this crap anyway.
So am currently a disowned bastard (probably until at least Monday afternoon). Anyone else have a family who make them wonder if the natal nurses made a mix up at the hospital where they were born?
He was fairly well off and left quite a wad of cash lying around. In fact many of the family suspected he had quite a few bob while he was still alive. To this end, one of my aunts and her husband, the family vultures, swooped in and started to take care of him when he started to get a bit peakey. When I was a kid I really doubted the conspiracy theories that my dad used to propogate about these two individuals, but this is the third such relative who they have done this too.
They are now extremely pissed off, because he didn't leave a will, the executor of his estate has expressed intention to divide up the inheritance evenly between everyone. But, says my aunt and her husband, they "invested" in his care, and as such have a greater claim to the money (and his property, a fairly decent house) than anyone else. My dads response has been measured and dignified - he compared his sister to Dr Shipman, and asked her if she merely ministers to the dead or helps borderline cases along. Thus a family-wide shouting match has begun, and promises to get really juicy too.
I suggested to my dad that they should just give the lot to charity, and in any event both him and my aunt are both on the graveyard side of 60, and so don't have enough time left for this crap anyway.
So am currently a disowned bastard (probably until at least Monday afternoon). Anyone else have a family who make them wonder if the natal nurses made a mix up at the hospital where they were born?
