Favorite Mass Effect 2 Quotes

[IrrelevantTangent]

"This one has forgotten whether or not it has replaced its weapons' heat sinks. It wonders if the criminal scum considers itself fortunate."

"The Council thought the first Hanar Spectre would play by the rules..."

"I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A SCIENTIST SALARIAN!"

"I enjoy seeing humans on their knees. *pause* That was a joke."

"If she [EDI] starts mouthing off about being the 'vanguard of our destruction', I call shotgun on the first lifeboat out of here."

[hr]


And the hilarious conversation between the lovestruck turian and oblivious quarian on the Citadel. You know the one.

 

[hazabaza1]

I liked the Salarian bachelor party. Fun times.

Also, not a quote, but headbutting a Krogan was hilarious.

 

[KSarty]

Thane recruitment mission
Garrus: We're vulnerable here if that elevator isn't empty
Grunt: Yeah, we should get behind...stuff

ship conversation
Mordin: Not now, trying to discover how scale-itch infected the Normandy. Sexually transmitted, only carried by Varren. Implications...unpleasant.

 

[Thaius]

"So you humans celebrate commitment by tempting infidelity?" Salarian, forced to sit through a bachelor party by his human friend

One of many great lines in that club.

 

[Pingieking]

All my favorites have already been mentioned.

All the conversations that took place during the bachelor party on Illium.
Mordin's song.
The officer's lecture on the cannon and "eyeball it".
EDI is pretty hilarious for an AI.

 

[Internet Kraken]

Like I said in the other thread;

Guard: "As this is a high-security vessel, you must relinquish possession of your weapons."
Shepard: "I'll relinquish one bullet. Where do you want it?"

 

[Leanbullet]

Shephard: You had a right not to follow your commands orders when they result in certain death.
Miranda: Well we'll have to remember that next Shephard orders us into near-cetain death.
Thane: Well that's about every 4 minutes!

 

[GrinningManiac]

I've yet to play the full game, but the sneak peek at the romantic dialouge possible between Fem-shepard and Garrus was hilarious

"You know I always like to save the last shot before popping the heat sink"
*embarresed/confused look from Shepard
*Relisation dawns on Garrus's face
"Wait...that analogy just went somewhere horrible...

 

[Slash Dementia]

"Those Asari-Hanar porn games they sell on Shiri'ka are really nasty" On the Citadel, near the game seller (or I think it was him).

 

[Comma-Kazie]

"Hey gunny, you've done something with the meals . . . almost like you've added more food and less ass."

Joker: "License to screw up, Commander--you heard it right from the ship!"

And although it's technically not a quote, Joker's mimicking of Legion really cracked me up.

 

[Programmed_For_Damage]

Joker: Garrus has finally worked that stick out of his butt and is now beating people to death with it.

 

[Callisto49]

Tali: "I just wanted you to know, I'm running a minor fever, my joints ache, and my sinuses are packed with I-don't-know-what. But it was TOTALLY worth it." After the 'romance' option.

Something like that. Made me chuckle.

Most of the other ones I like have already been mentioned.

 

[NoriYuki Sato]

"I sprained my thumb on the mute button, but I think I got my point across." - Joker

i love how much he hates EDI

 

[Durxom]

"Hey gunny, you've done something with the meals . . . almost like you've added more food and less ass."

Joker: "License to screw up, Commander--you heard it right from the ship!"

And although it's technically not a quote, Joker's mimicking of Legion really cracked me up.

I was just about to say that too, Joker's Legion impression made the game for me.

 

[MiracleOfSound]

'I catch what falls through the cracks.

Heh... through the cracks.'

 

[MiracleOfSound]

"Hey gunny, you've done something with the meals . . . almost like you've added more food and less ass."

Joker: "License to screw up, Commander--you heard it right from the ship!"

And although it's technically not a quote, Joker's mimicking of Legion really cracked me up.

I was just about to say that too, Joker's Legion impression made the game for me.

I couldn't stop laughing at that, hands down my favorite "Joker-moment"

That was so fucking funny...

Probably beats out Shale stepping on the chicken as my funniest game moment.

 

[Agayek]

As the title says, what are your favorite quotes from Mass Effect 2?

It is my belief that after playing this game, everyone will have at least one. The comedic value and writing of this game is golden!

Please put any quotes that may contain spoilers or plot elements in spoiler tags

My personal favorites so far (that I can remember):

"I am a biotic GOD!" - High Volus

"You're all racist!" - Turian at C-Sec Security

"A hospital. Not a good place to have a fight." -Garrus
"What IS a good place to have a fight?" - Mordin
"Garden... electronics store... antique shop, if it's classy." - Garrus

"That's right, Sir Isaac Newton is the deadliest sonofabitch in space!" - Gunnery Chief

Shephard: Why did you use my armor to repair yourself?
Legion: There was a hole.

 

[Omikron009]

Spoiler: Joker Near The End Game Quote

Joker - Great. See, this is where it starts, and when we're all just organic batteries, guess who they'll blame? "This is all Joker's fault. What a tool he was. I have to spend all day computing pi because he plugged in the Overlord."

Damn it! This was going to be mine! Let's see if I can think of anything else...

Anything Tali says during the romance segments with her. They're so adorably awkward. "I thought about bringing some music but I didn't know what you like and...I'm babbling like an idiot."

or, when during Tali's loyalty quest you ask admiral vas Qwib-Qwib about his name and she just facepalms and mumbles "Oh here we go."

 

[Shepard's Shadow]

I can't remember it exactly, but it happens if Legion is in your party when you go help Tali. You can intimidate the quarian that meets you, and Shepard says something like "If you don't let us in, I'll take off my mask and breathe germs all over this ship." It just sounds so immature when he says it.

I also loved Joker mocking Legion. It was hilarious, not a quote, but still.

 

[gxs]

I like Joker and EDI:

The part when Joker has an argument with EDI about "personalizing" his workspace and EDI replies that personalizing doesn't mean smearing grease over it's camera.

He fractured his thumb on the mute button. But he made a point.