Favourite Excuse

[drummersbangharder]

If I'm stuck in a conversation with someone I don't particularly like or know and want to get out of it, I'll say incredulously: "This is the longest conversation I've had in 5 years, Goodbye." That usually stops people dead in their tracks. They just stand their speechless. Just make sure you won't see them again.

 

[His22]

My friend and i were late to a programming class, with only 3 of us in it, and when asked by our teacher why we were late we told her we got chased by a lepper. She seemed genuinely worried about us, and starting asking if we were ok......

Although she was a bit senial....probably due to us in the first place.........

 

[Schnippshly]

"I didn't do it." People find it a lot harder to convict you of something if you deny doing it even though clearly you did.

 

[Fenchurch]

"If I told you, you'd think I was just making up excuses."
If they ask me to tell it anyway, I make up something ridiculous.

 

[Pumpkin_Eater]

I like to blame my screwups on the bots. If there are no bots I say that I'm drunk.

 

[Mullahgrrl]

I am between educations!

 

[Crofty]

"Telling you my reasons for [thing I need an excuse for] would be in breach of the official secrets act. Please refrain from further questioning."

 

[RetiarySword]

I HAVE TO RETURN SOME VIDEO TAPES!

High five who can tell me the film that is from!

 

[The Great JT]

(Points at some random person) He told me it was legal!

 

[lozzab]

What, I didn't do that... Are you sure it wasn't my evil twin? - this probably works better if you actually have a twin

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

I'm generally excused for lateness to class when I fabricate something about battling aliens / zombies /ninjas. People just accept that I'm odd and probably was.

 

[KosherGreenBean]

"It was like that when I got here" or "It wasn't me this time! I swear!"

Damn it. Beat me to it.

 

[Alleged_Alec]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=teMlv3ripSM

People always quit eventually. Or, alternatively, just tell something so strange that they forgot what they were doing.

 

[DreadfulSorry]

One of the best excuses I've ever heard my friend use:

"So, I couldn't do this assignment, because my field caught on fire." The best part? It was actually true.

 

[antipunt]

Denialism. Like -crazy-

"What me? *pfft* More likely you did it!"

 

[Skeleon]

"Sorry, I didn't listen."

Or just

"Sorry, my bad"

without further explanation

 

[shotgun ko]

I usually just stare at people blankly and say "what?" as if i didn't hear them. Dosent work, but it shrugs off the impending shouting/accusations/cricket bat beatings for a few seconds.....

 

[deranged_muppet]

"Shoulda, coulda, woulda, but I wanted to see that"

 

[TheEvilDuck]

"i was on the moon, with steve"

"I was dead at the time!"

EDDIE IZZARD FTW!!!!

When I was younger I used to say "BUT I HAVE LEARNING DISABILITIES!" I stopped doing that because no one cares.

 

[Armored Prayer]

"It's an illusion."