Female Perspective - Friend Zone

[Lil devils x_v1legacy]

I disagree that values and sexual attraction are necessarily related. Sexual attraction is based more on chemistry and timing rather than values. Sure you can grow to find someone attractive due to their values, but if you are excited and then get hit with someone you have extreme chemistry with values are the last thing to come to mind. It usually takes everything you have to resist your sexual attraction at that point =)

Chemistry = traits with strong emotional connotations. Emotions are based on values. Ergo, chemistry is ultimately values-based. Granted, some people's consciously held and subconsciously automated values do not add up, so they'll find themselves having "chemistry" with people they despise or even weirder situations.

It's really not all that complicated. What gets complicated is people's reactions to it.

No, no I am talking about Physical chemistry. Pheromones, the scent that drives you to act on your primitive instincts. You may be completey not interested in someone and have your body craving sex with them like mad. I am talking about "primal urges and needs" . You may not even know a person and be sexually attracted to their "scent".

 

[JMeganSnow]

No, no I am talking about Physical chemistry. Pheromones, the scent that drives you to act on your primitive instincts. You may be completey not interested in someone and have your body craving sex with them like mad. I am talking about "primal urges and needs" . You may not even know a person and be sexually attracted to their "scent".

Bull pucky. There is no evidence whatsoever to back this up. Human pheremones don't produce sexual arousal. (They do produce a certain degree of relaxation and comfort feelings--up to a point.)

Physical attractiveness is a value like any other. So is smelling good. Failure to introspect and be aware of the sources of one's emotions does not change that fact.

 

[RiboNucleicAxe]

I know they won't run into a burning house to save me like my friends would (and I would for them).

Really? Because I'd do this for any of my male friends. It's why when I was growing up I was glad that Canada is one of the few countries in the world with conscription for both sexes - if we ever went to war my friends wouldn't be forced to go off without me like they would in, say, the US draft.

I've walked them home from bars, I've driven two hours out of my way at four in the morning to pick them up so they wouldn't have to drink and drive, I've helped pull them off of each other when they're fighting, I've let them sleep in my room when their fathers were drunk and hitting them, I've let them cry on my shoulder when they broke up with their girlfriends... because my bros are the best and they'd do the same for me.

You don't think I'm worthy of being your friend because I happen to have an extra X chromosome? Your loss, comrade. I'll stick to being friends with - and sleeping with - men who think more highly of me than that.

This is one of the few examples of proper friendship I've read on this thread. I hope they're as good to you as you are to them <3

 

[Cookie-darling]

Personally, it doesn't matter how long it takes for a guy to ask a girl out. If she is extremely interested in you, that won't change. She might move on if she thinks you aren't interested in her, but if you eventually show your interest she will probably reciprocate as long as she is not in a committed relationship. It is also very important for a guy and a girl to be good friends before they start dating. It's rather stupid to do it the other way around, because then all you have is the passion, none of the intimacy or commitment. It is very important to have all three components for a lasting relationship to work. Intimacy is translated as having trust between one another and being able to share all your deepest thoughts whenever you wish. If you begin dating someone, but you barely know them, or you have no intimacy with this person or desire for a true commitment, then you are simply having a sexual relationship. Which is totally cool if that's what you both want. Either way, though, if a girl likes a guy, she shouldn't wait forever for him to ask her out and then simply move on when he does not- if she really wants to be with him, she should drop a lot of big hints, or perhaps even ask him out herself. It's not taboo.

 

[Cookie-darling]

No, no I am talking about Physical chemistry. Pheromones, the scent that drives you to act on your primitive instincts. You may be completey not interested in someone and have your body craving sex with them like mad. I am talking about "primal urges and needs" . You may not even know a person and be sexually attracted to their "scent".

Bull pucky. There is no evidence whatsoever to back this up. Human pheremones don't produce sexual arousal. (They do produce a certain degree of relaxation and comfort feelings--up to a point.)

Physical attractiveness is a value like any other. So is smelling good. Failure to introspect and be aware of the sources of one's emotions does not change that fact.

Actually, we are all animals. Animals in the wild give off a chemical into the air that attracts the mate to them. Females give off a chemical attraction to males, and vice versa. It is actually quite scientific. Human pheromones is a controversial subject that we do not fully understand, but there is a natural animal craving for sex. Naturally, people are attracted to people who are symmetrical. http://www.livescience.com/7023-rules-attraction-game-love.html
Women often state they love the smell of men's shirts, armpits, and sweat. The sweat has their natural body chemicals in it. Most people do not find people attractive who are unhealthy and non symmetrical. This goes back to animal instincts of wanting to find the best mate possible. Women are more choosy because they have to find the ideal male to carry on the gene pool. Most women do desire to be with a fit, healthy and rich man. Not because they are shallow, but because he provides security and healthy genetics. Men are less picky because they only need to inseminate any female in the world and they will have a high chance of creating offspring. They are kinda choosy, but they simply want females who display fertile characteristics such as good hips, round breasts, and a very feminine form. A woman who looks like a man will be less attractive to the majority of men at first sight- it would be more about intellect there, and that is a whole other story. I have heard many men state they love the smell of the female genitalia, or even just the smell of female sweat. It's the same thing as a woman loving the scent of a man's sweat or clothing. And I am not referring to men who spray a bunch of cologne on.