First thing you'd say after rising from a coma.

[zHellas]

"None of you fuckers better have changed my name to Rip Van Winkle!!!"

 

[Booze Zombie]

"Took you long enough to press the reset button."

 

[Kamon42]

"Still no good games out? Fail.." Relapse into coma

 

[Gentleman_Reptile]

Has the music gotten any better yet?

 

[RamirezDoEverything]

"I'll have a coke"

 

[Deadpool062]

ABOUT GOD DAMN TIME! Or something along those lines

 

[dancinginfernal]

"Two questions. Have my loved ones given up on me yet, and do I have an epic beard?"

 

[Nuclear Pancake]

'Guess whos back, back again' ect

 

[somadman]

WHO TOUCHED SASHA!!!

 

[bulbasaur765]

Can cats and dogs talk yet?

or

How many Pokemon are there now?

 

[Scarim Coral]

How much have I missed from Naurto Shippuden, Bleach, Fairy Tail and One Piece episodes and manga's?

 

[ssgt splatter]

"Where the white women at?" Random one-liner from robot chicken.
or
"What year is it? 2020?! Do we have virtual reality porn yet?"

 

[Carnagath]

"God damnit, I'm still alive?"

 

[Mechsoap]

''Shit, that was a helluva night''

 

[le picklez]

"What the fuck..."

 

[Baldry]

...This isn't my bed...

 

[garfoldsomeoneelse]

Somebody wheel me to the nearest bathroom and get me a laptop, my pipes are in serious need of a clearing.

EDIT: Better yet: "I have seen heaven! Quick, get me a book deal!"

 

[Nouw]

"So what's happening?"

The logical question to ask, then proceed to live my life as I missed out a considerable amount of time.

 

[Rickyvantof]

"I'm never drinking again."

 

[Darkwhite]

I LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE