First thing you'd say after rising from a coma.

[Not-here-anymore]

"DARY!"

Of course, I would have said "It's gonna be Legend- wait for it." right before falling into the coma.

Best. Coma line. Ever!

Possibly something incredibly boring like 'when am I?'
Or I might leave asking questions until I've checked to make sure I haven't woken up mid-apocalypse a la Resident Evil, 28 Days Later, or the Walking Dead.

Alternatively, 'If anyone tells me how Mass Effect 3 ends, I will end them!'

 

[loc978]

...n'some bread, too!

 

[JoshGod]

Why am i still tired?

 

[FoolKiller]

"I guess those all-nighters from school finally caught up with me, huh?"

 

[Father Tunde]

"So... I take it the Malayans weren't right?"

"So... Was Al Gore anywhere near right"

"Where's my Robot Nurse?"

 

[DarkRyter]

"I'm back, bitches."

 

[Zarmi]

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum, but I'm all outta bubblegum

 

[Calcabrina]

"I want food" Or something like that.
Or maybe just go back to sleep.

 

[Ninonybox_v1legacy]

Fucking Lag

 

[DRSH1989]

There's a bomb in the building! RUUUUN!

 

[urahara75]

"So... does my health insurance cover this type of thing?" and, "Who sold their stuff &/or body parts as collateral in my staid?". ;P

OTOH, I could always stick w/ the jokey, "Hey!! Did anybody look after my Chia-Pets??"...

 

[Headsprouter]

''I SLEPT THROUGH THE RELEASE OF THE ELDER SCROLLS V!!!????? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!''

 

[Hader]

I like chocolate milk.

 

[Wondermint13]

Braaaaaaaaainsss...

 

[xdom125x]

"Where When am I?"

 

[kwagamon]

Well that was a slightly longer sleep than usual...

 

[Mr. Bojangles]

"O hai guiz!"

I couldn't resist.

 

[MagnusShalefist]

"The Sleeper has awakened!"

 

[ReaperzXIII]

MWHAHAHA THE PROPHECY HAS BEEN FULFILLED! BOW DOWN FOOLS AS I YOUR IMMORTAL MASTER AWAKENS TO CONQUER THE EARTH!!! YOU HUMAN FEMALE GET ME MY CHARIOTS AND MY CONCUBINES!!!!

 

[Assassin Xaero]

"I'm still alive? Goddammit."
*sigh*
"Where's the bathroom?"