Fortunately, Unfortunately

[M0rp43vs]

Fortunately, A fairy appears and will grant you a wish
Unfortunately, if the wish isn't "I wish to become you're slave", She will cut off your limbs

 

[mcpop9]

Fortunately an army of smurfs kills the fairy
Unfortunately they are hungry
And are carnivores
And you are stuck in a. Burning bus...
And they like their meat cooked........

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Fortunately the fairy dust created by the rotting fairy corpse grants you superhuman powers, allowing you to throw the burning bus at the smurfs.

Unfortunately, you miss.

 

[M0rp43vs]

Fortunately a wandering group of Mac Feegles come and slaughter the smurfs with reckless abandon
Unfortunately, they are worse than the smurfs and are getting bored, setting their sites on you

 

[M0rp43vs]

Fortunately, like the real Winston Churchill, the robot, While charismatic, is not very formidable or much of a threat.

Unfortunately, they've sent a non-robotic Jack Churchill into the present/future to stop you from travelling back in time to cause all of this

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Fortunately, the Doctor annihilates Jack Churchill to prevent the space time continuum getting damaged further.

Unfortunately, you`re next on his list.

 

[M0rp43vs]

Fortunately the time travel arc is over and this plot thread is left hanging(...or is it?)

Unfortunately, you have locked yourself out of your car

 

[Mr. Omega]

Fortunately you are the master of unlocking and manage to get the door open.

Unfortunately, you don't have the keys for the car.

 

[M0rp43vs]

Fortunately you are also adept at hotwiring so it doesnt bother you.
Unfortunately you realized you took the bus earlier and this is not your car. The owner seems to have noticed in any case and has called the cops. You are now locked in a car chase with a fleet of police cruisers and police choppers

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Fortunately, the TARDIS cannot reach the dimension you`ve moved into, so you`re safe for now.

Unfortunately, this dimension is full of zombie hoardes. And you`re all outta gas.

 

[M0rp43vs]

BUt hey, Zombie meat is still meat... sorta

Unfortunately, you are still thirsty. And turns out your stomach does not agree with rotting meat

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Fortunately, you use your trusty jetpack you always keep in the trunk to avoid drowning.

Unfortunately, you cannot control your jetpack, end up at 32000 feet, and about to freeze to death.

 

[Vesuvius Hetlan]

Fortunately, you have a thesaurus and easily able to reclassify the Hoodlum and rapscallions into something else.

Unfortunately the only word the thesaurus has in it is rapist and space marine. (Choose wisely who get's what name...)

 

[M0rp43vs]

Fortunately you prepared a lightsaber that would dispatch these two without fail.
Unfortunately it is left behind in the flooded dimension and because of an oversight by the stupid designer you cannot pass this section without it.
No you can't use the thesaurus as a bludgeoning weapon
No you can't use the gun in your pocket on them, you have to save it for the section with the zombie in your bathroom later
No you can't just punch-Listen when I said stupid designer, I mean stupid designer

The muggers are approaching you slowly...

 

[Yuno Gasai]

Fortunately, you've dealt with this kind of thing before, and are able to avoid being raped mercilessly and slaughtered brutally by Space Marines.

Unfortunately, you didn't realize that rapists and Space Marines aren't the only inhabitants of the level you're on. You're now face-to-face with a strange tentacle demon which seems to have captured a Japanese schoolgirl, and is now setting its grotesque sights on you.

 

[Vesuvius Hetlan]

Fortunately you manage to save the japanese schoolgirl from the tentacle monster and get away.

Unfortunately the Japanese schoolgirl was a super assassin sent to kill you.

 

[Heartcafe]

Fortunately, you were a J-pop idol and entranced the schoolgirl with your BAMF dance skills and incredible hair-do

Unfortunately, this means the only chicks you will be getting are underage and their fathers/boyfriends are plotting your painful demise.

 

[Vesuvius Hetlan]

Fortunately you manage to seduce their fathers/boyfriends.

Unfortunately you manage to seduce their fathers/boyfriends.

 

[Kieros]

Fortunately, you packed an umbrella.
Unfortunately, it was a new folding variety. That you packed in the wallet.

 

[M0rp43vs]

But hey, it's not like the rain is gonna kill ya or anything.
Unfortunately, The rain is trying kill you. Each raindrop contains tiny Steven Seagal out for your blood. And the rain is acid rain