Fortune cookie corner

[Souplex]

Hello, and welcome to fortune cookie corner where we share our favorite fortunes!
*Breaks open a cookie*
*Munch* *Munch*
Money is a means to an end; not the end itself.
What are your favorite fortunes?

 

[Neonbob]

You are expecting something deep from a tiny slip of paper. The hell is wrong with you?

Okay, it's not real YET, but give it time.
It will be printed one day.

 

[NeutralDrow]

"Bad luck and misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for the rest of eternity."

Cookie to anyone who gets that.

 

[Sassafrass]

'Fame will find you eventually'

Lame, but possibly awesome.

And a joke one.

'You will catch an STD from your partner.'

 

[oppp7]

I like the ones that aren't fortunes, just telling you about your personality. Can't quote one though.
Also, one said my mother was good to her wife. Seriously...

 

[Nitpicker of the Wastes]

Your lucky numbers are 41, 23, 56, 24, and 19.

I never understood those numbers.

I've also never seen one with 42 on it...

 

[Valate_v1legacy]

"You're fucked, lucky numbers: Not 6."- I actually got that once...

 

[Metric Monkey]

"Tastes like chicken"
I really don't know what the hell it meant when I got it, and I still don't know.

Spoiler: Image

EDIT:

A little thing my family likes to do with fortune cookies is to read them aloud and then add "...in bed" to the original fortune.

Here are some memorable ones:

"You will become the leader today...in bed."
"Avoid the opposite sex today...in bed."
"You will experience great changes in your wardrobe...in bed."

You just made me read through the entire thread doing that.
I'm so immature.

 

[skitzo van]

I got one that said "the successful road is often lonely"... I think the fortune cookie told me I was gonna die alone...

 

[Timotei]

"Don't be a prisoner at the Fortune Cookie Factory" - I got that one with an order of Panda Express

 

[Souplex]

"You're fucked, lucky numbers: Not 6."- I actually got that once...

You are fucked in bed. It works for everything.

I got one that said "the successful road is often lonely"... I think the fortune cookie told me I was gonna die alone...

To be fair it could also mean you die poor.

 

[Da Joz]

"I'm glad I finally got out of that cookie"

"You will find true love on Flag Day"

 

[Da Joz]

"Bad luck and misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for the rest of eternity."

Cookie to anyone who gets that.

Rockos modern life, filburt gets it the day before he goes on the mega spin game show.

 

[Timotei]

"You will be successful in the field of entertainment."

Was this before or after you're Issac Clarke Log post. If it was before then do not discount that cookie.

 

[Fire Daemon]

I hate those North Korean fortune cookies.

"You are a coward"

Nobody wants to read that after a nice meal.

 

[Dr Pussymagnet]

"Your fortune is yet to come."

True story.

 

[Kuchinawa212]

"Victory is fleeting. The struggle is eternal"

Just let it sink in...Best fortune cookie ever!

 

[martin's a madman]

"You suck, everyone hates you, including me, I don't know you and I do not wish to know you. You are an immeasurable blight to society, I hope this cookie gives you food poisoning or you are struck by a bus while enjoying your meal." Lucky numbers: 9,11,20,12.

 

[Chicago Ted]

I hate those North Korean fortune cookies.

"You are a coward"

Nobody wants to read that after a nice meal.

Least it's not as bad as the Japanese ones.

'YOU DISHONOUR US!'

On topic though, I really can't remember the last time I had fortune cookies.

 

[Trivun]

"The wise man once said, 'is wisdom a state of being, or am I just high?'"

Not a true one, obviously. But wouldn't that be awesome? It would prove my long held belief that true wisdom is only to be found in the listening of indie rock and folk tunes [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_SAjG4UDqHs&feature=PlayList&p=43997DB7AA69212B&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=39&shuffle=4953] and the consumption of large amounts of alcohol and weed. Which sounds good to me