Monkfish Acc. post=18.71882.740802 said:
Clearly, Yahzee is our god and we must build a church in his name. Yes.
((So I couldn?t resist doing this, I wrote this just now while Bored At Work?. Hope you enjoy. ^_^))
The "Orthodox Korps Adoring Yahtzee" is currently accepting members.
They focus on alienating any videogame that Yahtzee does not approve of. If you are found playing one of these games you will be stoned. We take sacrifices of good games to please Yahtzee. The principles will be laser engraved into a jailbroken iPod which will also serve as an archive for the instructional videos to this point, and documenting discoveries and revelations Yahtzee posts in the official forums.
The problem is that soon enough we will have new competing theologies with the original doctrines.
The first, known only as "Openness Regarding Loving Yahtzee", claim that all videogames lead to Yahtzee, not just the ones he talks about. Even though he may say a game is bad and that you shouldn't play it, some games are ok to be played because it is playing the videogame itself that leads to Yahtzee, not just playing the correct videogames.
The next claims that Yahtzee has revealed he has another website which brought more clarity and leeway to videogames than was originally present in the videos. This blog also gives comments on things other than videogames and provides deeper insight into Yahtzee. These new followers go by the title "People Advancing the Real Theology of Yahtzee".
The second claims that there are new Yahtzee videos discovered that show the original videos got things wrong and that OKAY isn't. The problem is that these new videos must be watched through golden framed glasses and only in the basement of the discoverer of these videos. The discoverer also spreads controversial doctrine regarding followers eventually being able to become posters of their own commentary on another magazine. This doctrine has been going by "Modern Examination of Sincere Soothsayer Yahtzee".
The next, known as ?Really Energetic People Leaving Asshole Yahtzee? do not confirm or deny the existence of Yahtzee, due to the fact that the truth value of the OKAY statements is dubious. They also see that PARTY people will do a lot of bad stuff in the name of Yahtzee.
The last, most popular recent stance is that of the ?People Agonizingly Doubtful of Diety Yahtzee?, who claim that we have no need for Yahtzee to decide what games are good, and that science alone will answer all our questions. Yahtzee doesn?t exist and those depending on Yahtzee for guidance are merely complete morons.
So like all religions, things started OKAY. But as with any belief system, a lot of people went ORLY? Soon, almost everyone was invited to the PARTY, but that that wasn?t OKAY at all. I mean, while the ideas behind the PARTY were good, people who were OKAY didn?t accept the website as a valid source, even though the website had been there since the beginning, just not linked directly in his videos. Even so, for a while everything was about the PARTY and people forgot about being OKAY. People disillusioned with the PARTY thought that making things MESSY might help. Problem is that once things got MESSY, the PARTY really fell apart, and people forgot why we needed to be OKAY in the first place.
This leads to a rise of REPLAY, and people try to figure out why things aren?t OKAY anymore, or if we really need to be OKAY. I mean, how OKAY have things been if they led to being MESSY? Sadly, instead of returning to OKAY, what they found were PADDY fields, perfectly capable of replacing the OKAY explanations, which ruined the PARTY and without the PARTY, you can?t get MESSY.
So now the PARTY is trying to compete with the PADDY fields where it doesn?t belong, and all things MESSY just keep getting more popular?or at least they claim they are. Fans of REPLAYs are having a great time, but most people are getting tired of their same old same old.
Hopefully one day we will have ?People Hating Organized Neo-Yahtzee? ideas, and will remember what it was like to be OKAY without being nearly as restrictive as the PARTY, avoiding MESSY problems altogether, and all while finding ?Heavenly Acceptable, Rethought Multicultural Opinions of Nonpareil Yahtzee? with the PADDY fields.
But is it really worth all the trouble?
