Getting Rejected : What's the worst that could happen?

[SonicKoala]

Sure, worse stuff could happen, but when it comes to asking out girls, it seems to me that the potential gain more often than not FAR outweights the potential loss, so I still think it's a risk worth taking (and if you don't think that, I'd strongly suggest growing some balls - you're clearly lacking them).

OT: I've never been rejected - I suppose I'm just lucky... I guess.

You've never been rejected, and you've never experienced how much that can hurt. Don't pretend like you understand it when you don't, and don't insult people that have been through shit you haven't.

I wasn't trying to insult anyone, I was making a really bad joke about people who don't take that risk - however, I suppose after being rejected, the fear of rejection would become a bigger factor, and I'm sure that getting rejected can be incredibly painful, depending on the circumstances. Like you said, I've never experienced that, but I'm sure I will one day.

I'm sorry that you took offense to my post - in retrospect, it was both thoughtless and ignorant, and I apologize.

 

[Doc Theta Sigma]

I dunno whether its just my own personal flaw or just extremely bad luck... But the last two or three girls (who are still my very good friends) that I was going to ask up ended up telling me they had gotten back together with their douchebag ex-boyfriends right before I was about to ask them out. Now... I know its not technically rejection but its still a punch to the stomach. After that I got over them pretty quickly... We're still good friends and only one of them knows how I felt about her. She of course gave the "You're a sweet guy and a good friend" speech. Life goes on though...

 

[Crazycat690]

Lol, so wrong, the worst thing that could happin isn't rejection, it's that she says yes, you get a kid, married and after 10 years she get a divorce and take all your money. IN YOUR FACE!

However, the worst thing that could happen if she rejected you is probably that you die. What? You said THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN!

 

[zhoominator]

I've asked out 4 girls in total and was rejected all 4 times. Of course, if you aren't particularly confident like me then that can knock the confidence more I suppose.

There is another girl who I like but won't ask out since there is too much to lose there.

 

[CrayZ]

Worst rejections? I can't remember anything hardcore. She just said no. You deal with it.

Besides, when I feel rejected, I stop feeling rejected and start being awesome, true story.

I suppose the worst possible rejection is death, although I'm unsure how the hell that could happen...

Some pretty entertaining stories in the posts above, so kudos.

 

[GrinningManiac]

The Worst?

Getting rejected when you haven't actually ASKED HER OUT

I have a friend who, two years ago, was talking to this girl. They really got on. He said "do you wanna go see a film tonight?"

To clarify: he already had a girlfriend, he was just really getting along with this girl and knew she'd want to see this film.

She let him down gently with the whole "Moving too fast, Wanna be friends, You're a sweet guy" speech, only to later realise he had literally JUST. WANTED. TO. SEE. A. FILM.

His ACTUAL girlfriend heard about the incident through the grapevein, and an argument ensued. He managed to explain things well enough (which is hard to do and nigh-on impossible to achieve in the face of a very angry woman (let's be honest, arguments become one-sided at that point)) and they were fine.

The other girl? She "vanished" for a while

 

[JazzCP]

You. Have. NO. Idea. I've been strung along by every girl I've ever had any feelings for. I mean, every single one. Just because they see me as just like every other guy that they had been out with before, despite the fact I'm one of the nice ones. I hate being an 18 year old British man sometimes...

The Worst?

Getting rejected when you haven't actually ASKED HER OUT

I have a serious request. Stop getting inside my head. It's weird... XD

 

[Adzma]

Sure, worse stuff could happen, but when it comes to asking out girls, it seems to me that the potential gain more often than not FAR outweights the potential loss, so I still think it's a risk worth taking (and if you don't think that, I'd strongly suggest growing some balls - you're clearly lacking them).

Oh that's cute, just because a guy is concerned about having the worst happen to him he needs to grow balls. But not you of course, YOU ARE A MAN!!!!!!!!

Please.

 

[Carnagath]

Probably the most painful rejection I can remember happened when I was 15 and told a girl that I really like her, only to be met with...complete silence. She just stood there looking at the floor, and it drove me insane because I didn't know what the hell was going on. I said her name a couple of times to at least get her to look at me, she didn't, and I said "nevermind" and fucked off. I saw her again a couple of weeks later and we had a talk like nothing ever happened, "What's up?" "Not much" etc. That made me feel terrible, I'd take a "LOL NO" over that any time.

 

[DazWolf]

I have never rejected anyone on the rare occasion I've actually been asked out. However....about six months into my last relationship, I suddenly got shot down when he decided to run off and marry a friend of a friend of a friend. No one has asked since.

Best part: "Oh, I never would have met her if it weren't for you!" His mom said I should have punched him, even if it was his wedding day.

 

[Jolly Madness]

I would prefer the 'get really close and then go for the long awaited kiss' thing often seen in Hollywood.
Okay, it doesn't happen often in real life but hey....

Woah, that actually happened to me. *Feels special*

Anyhoo. I've never had the opportunity to be rejected (probably because I'm a cowardly bastard), but I have turned down a girl friend of me. And apparently it does get worse then being sad or disappointed. I won't say that she's emo, but she's a foster child and isn't usually happy. Seeing someone utterly crushed because of something you did... it's not something you want.
Love sucks, basically.

Oh, and when your best friend loves you, it doesn't really improve the friendship. Unless she's VERY vain.

 

[Inco]

Probably the most painful rejection I can remember happened when I was 15 and told a girl that I really like her, only to be met with...complete silence. She just stood there looking at the floor, and it drove me insane because I didn't know what the hell was going on. I said her name a couple of times to at least get her to look at me, she didn't, and I said "nevermind" and fucked off. I saw her again a couple of weeks later and we had a talk like nothing ever happened, "What's up?" "Not much" etc. That made me feel terrible, I'd take a "LOL NO" over that any time.

Ahhh, the old psychologically destructive one.

Worse than just a 'no' as it really screws around with your head. At least with the 'no' you get it up, front and out.

Whereas that one can really mess with your head. Sometimes its because the girl likes you as a really good friend ,nothing more, but doesn't want to try and hurt by saying 'no' to your face. Only to make it worse by doing that.

But back onto the topic. They often say 'no is only the worst it is going to get'
I think that is more referred to clubbing and parties with people you might never see again. As they can't really spread rumours about you and ruin you personal self esteem, because they will not actually know who the hell you are. While at school, you are forced to know someone to a slight degree.

You. Have. NO. Idea. I've been strung along by every girl I've ever had any feelings for. I mean, every single one. Just because they see me as just like every other guy that they had been out with before, despite the fact I'm one of the nice ones. I hate being an 18 year old British man sometimes...

Well, i got a nice piece of advice for ya, even if you one of the nice ones. String them along yourself. Thats what they are used to nowadays. Don't get attached to a specific individual, just string people along until you know that they are the real deal.
Trust me, i am in the same position as you (except for the British part, I am Aussie.) and it has stopped me getting to involved in things that are way over my head.

 

[aseelt]

Worst for me: I asked a girl out at work, she said yes. And then the next day said no.

The rest of that working day was *incredibly* awkward. And then she went off sick and never came back to work again.

Found out later she had a boyfriend, and that everyone else at work knew. Wtf?

 

[Zepren]

I started seeing this girl thinking she was single, seeing as she told me that she had just broke up from her bf, turns out she didnt specify which boyfriend as she had two. Yeah so that was pretty much fucked up. finding out yourself ie no one telling you not even her is the worst part. Meh

 

[Cowabungaa]

I got rejected once, she told me she was a lesbian.

She wasn't, of course, she told me to 'spare my feelings' which also proved that she didn't actually know me. I hate being lied to like that, I'm an honest guy.

Looking back at it, I see that it has only been a good experience. It wouldn've lasted between us anyway, seeing as she turned out to be a massive bigot against almost anything I liked (everything that's animated is for toddlers, every gamer is an addict, etc etc) and I learned some valuable lessons from it.

The first and most important was to be honest about your emotions. Keeping them a secret only gives you trouble in the end. And of course the valuable lesson that not every crush is really love, I learned how to make that distinction. In the end, it's easy to see why I had a crush on her. She was the first girl I ever met that was actually interested in gaming (sure, one of those typical Sims players, but she was dying to try out Oblivion) and she even lived in my street. But sadly, she was a massive *****.

 

[high_castle]

I'm assuming the OP is still in school. Once you get out of there, it really gets easier. Teenagers tend to be a bit emotionally immature. But asking people out as an adult generally yields more mature responses. You may still be turned down, but the nature of the turn-down generally eases up quite a bit. You'll usually just get a polite, "No, thank you" or sometimes a white lie of "I'm already seeing someone." At least, that's what I do when I'm asked out by guys I'm not interested in. And remember, you won't hear "yes" if you never ask in the first place.

 

[Plurralbles]

she shot me in the foot with a .22.

 

[IckleMissMayhem]

OT: I haven't been rejected. Not that I'm irresistable, I just like to be very sure that they'll say yes when I ask.

This. Or I work my charms, and wait for them to ask.

 

[BonsaiK]

I once had someone laugh at me, then proceed to avoid and ignore me for a year, while spreading rumours about me.

Meh. That's not such a bad outcome. You could have been stalked, that's far worse.

You should never be afraid of rejection though. I'm running at the rate of about one rejection per week so far this year. I'm cool with it.