Girlfriend moving in

[Rylot]

So I've got a girlfriend who currently lives in Austin, Texas and is strongly considering moving up here (here being Eastern Washington State). She is still a student and is planning on going to a community college here if she moves up. She's also heavily involved in sports (track) and is moving up here in part because of me but also because she doesn't have a team near her in Texas while there is a rather large team here in my hometown. I live in a two bedroom two bath with a friend of mine. My roommate and girlfriend both know each other and are on good terms. We've known each other for about a year and have been seriously dating for the past two months. We're intimate but have no immediate plans to get married or have children.

Background stuff taken care of; does anyone have any advice, things to watch out for, horror stories?

 

[Ando85]

A buddy of mine had a live in girlfriend in college in a 1 bedroom apartment. Problem was she could not concentrate on her studies without some sort of private room so they eventually had to get a different apartment.

Seeing as you have a two bedroom with three people it might be tough not having your own personal space as I suppose you would be sharing a room with your gf. If you are anything like me you need a personal man cave. I've found being around anyone for too long would get on my nerves. But, depending on how extroverted or introverted you are it might not be a problem for you personally.

Another buddy of mine had a live in girlfriend and they broke up. Problem was he didn't make a lot of money so paying the rent and utilities by himself without any help put a big strain on his finances.

Best of luck to you. I'd say go for it but consider there might be a few snags.

 

[Jodah]

Just be ready for her girlying up your pad. I had a roommate that had a live in girlfriend during college. It was okay but she did add some stuff to various rooms that three guys never would have needed or even wanted.

 

[lettucethesallad]

Living with someone is a pretty big deal. All those little things that annoy you but you figure you can ignore - imagine them every day. Seeing eachother all the time, household chores and limited personal space can all take their tolls. And after 2 months of dating, and by the sound of it having a long distance relationship, are you really ready for it? I'm not trying to be a dick, but are you sure you've thought this through?

If it were me, I'd probably look at her getting her own place nearby, and then take it from there. If things are still cool in a few months and the relationship is still going strong, then I'd bring up the moving in issue again. I had a long distance relationship for a year before moving across the country to move in with my boyfriend at the time. It crashed and burned pretty quickly. When just seeing eachother during every other weekend, there wasn't time to reflect over if we were a good couple - it was just fun having the chance to hang out, and you were blinded to any warning signals about not being compatible in your way of doing things. It's such a big difference between having a long distance relationship and a 'regular' relationship when you live near eachother that I'd be careful about doing it again.

Anywho, I hope things work out for you. Best of luck.

 

[Rylot]

snip

That is a pretty valid point for me. I think I'll have to have some me time set aside every now and then. She's also supported pretty well by her parents so she'll be helping with evenly with rent and everything.

Snip

She isn't too girly but yeah, I'm prepared for pink things to start showing up.

Snip

Yeah, I definitely know there are some pretty difficult challenges with living together. I did forget to mention that she spent three weeks with me last month with no problems. I like to think that we have enough communication to talk about the little things before they start piling up, but I'll definitely keep that in mind.

 

[Ziadaine_v1legacy]

After only dating 2 months, I think that's a bit of a too-soon big leap for you. Heck, I'd recommend moving in with someone only after 6 months and a strong relationship. Alot can go wrong in under 6 months very quickly.

 

[Zorak the Mantis]

My last girlfriend and I lived together for a semester in college, It was nice at first, but I think it was too soon, we weren't used to each others mannerisms or day to day lifestyle yet so it took some getting used to. I believe it is best to wait at least 6 months to a year before you start living together.