"hello everybody"

[Fairee]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

 

[coldwarkid]

Also, who on earth let out the rabid raccoon!?

my bad, i left the gate open when i went to the shops earlier >_<

Hmm, well, you shall be punished.

aww man, im already moving the body

I sincerely hope so. However, you may have more than one to move soon enough...

thanks anynews i should know

Most news comes in regular updates on the front page of the site. There's a forum guidelines link at the top of the forums page which is always useful to be aware of.

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Look, if we need a new body, I'll see what I can do.

*gets out hatchet*

I'm away to look for an unsuspecting Ned. Won't be long. Glasgow's crawling in the buggers.

If you're out getting more bodies then try this time to make sure they get preserved properly, last time the embalming fluid leaked everywhere, took us days to get it out of the carpet. Speaking of which, it's brand new this carpet so please for the love of God make sure you carry a few body bags with you. I'm not getting brain fluid anywhere this time...

No worries my friend, I've got some Tesco's own bin bags, and the wee buggers come preserved in buckfast. This job could get no easier. I'm even going to leave the hatchet in for comic effect/added warning.

 

[Trivun]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

Hello, I never got my welcome so I'll just give the one that was so frequently denied from me:

Welcome to the Escapist, I hope you like it here.

Welcome to the Escapist!

Cpt. I believe the above psot has a job for you.

Which one? There's quite a few above posts.

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

Oh yea, I remember now. The SAS guys were nice though.

Edit: Double post, sorry all.

 

[sky14kemea]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

Oh yea, I remember now. The SAS guys were nice though.

yeah, one guy fixed my ipod, and gave my pet rock a bath =D shame the racoon bit him on the way out

 

[Trivun]

If you're out getting more bodies then try this time to make sure they get preserved properly, last time the embalming fluid leaked everywhere, took us days to get it out of the carpet. Speaking of which, it's brand new this carpet so please for the love of God make sure you carry a few body bags with you. I'm not getting brain fluid anywhere this time...

No worries my friend, I've got some Tesco's own bin bags, and the wee buggers come preserved in buckfast. This job could get no easier. I'm even going to leave the hatchet in for comic effect/added warning.

Fair enough If you need any more hatchets try the shed out back. Otherwise, I have a sniper rifle you can borrow, although it doesn't really add the same level of fear...

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

Oh yea, I remember now. The SAS guys were nice though.

Oh yes, definitely. We offered them tea and biscuits, except that one who stamped on my hand when I tripped. He was pretty nasty

 

[Fairee]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

I think me giving out a few *ahem* favours helped sweeten the deal too. I'd better stick around, you guys may not be so lucky next time......

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

I think me giving out a few *ahem* favours helped sweeten the deal too. I'd better stick around, you guys may not be so lucky next time......

So that's who keeps ringing us then hanging up when I answer!

 

[Trivun]

dont worry about said body under the stairs, im moving it to the dumpster tomorrow =D

But then what will we warn people about?

Max?

Oh yea, there is always Max. Look out for him, new guy, or you may be the body.

There is no proof that Max was responsible for that death. Just because he was in the cupboard with her seconds before she died, doesn't mean he was responsible......

But there was a sign saying "Max's body - Do not Touch" for ages.

Yeah, until the cops got interested. Now we don't know anything about what happened.....

I did say not to let them in.

We didn't have much choice. They broke down the door at 9am while we were all asleep.

I concur. I was having such a nice dream about ponies too and suddenly six SWAT teams, riot police, SAS and Delta Squad burst down the door... It was lucky they didn't reach the main storage containers in the back, else we'd all be in the Bay now... As it happens Max was out so they let us off with a warning. I never did get back to sleep afterwards though...

I think me giving out a few *ahem* favours helped sweeten the deal too. I'd better stick around, you guys may not be so lucky next time......

I find myself wondering what favours these could have been... Anyway, the tea and biscuits went down a treat, Ginger Snaps if I recall

 

[i never thought so]

I hope i use the correct gramma then.

 

[Incredible Bullshitting Man]

I´m starting to be more and more convinced that Max isn´t a real person. Rather, it is an supranormal being born from constant derailment. It is, in fact, the thread derailing incarnate. It derails everything it touches. See for yourself; The guy isn´t even present (and hasn´t been for a while, as far as I know), but still he managed to derail this thread. Or more precisely, we are derailing this under its name. The end is near, I tell you.

EDIT: One more thing: Welcome! Hope you enjoy your stay. If I may take a moment of your time, I advise you to look through these guidelines, if you haven´t already. It will do you good. Have a nice day.

 

[coldwarkid]

If you're out getting more bodies then try this time to make sure they get preserved properly, last time the embalming fluid leaked everywhere, took us days to get it out of the carpet. Speaking of which, it's brand new this carpet so please for the love of God make sure you carry a few body bags with you. I'm not getting brain fluid anywhere this time...

No worries my friend, I've got some Tesco's own bin bags, and the wee buggers come preserved in buckfast. This job could get no easier. I'm even going to leave the hatchet in for comic effect/added warning.

Fair enough If you need any more hatchets try the shed out back. Otherwise, I have a sniper rifle you can borrow, although it doesn't really add the same level of fear...

You're too late, job's done! I put down a tarpaulin to save the carpet, and left a honey badger in the doorway just in case one of the little illiterate buggers gets brave.

Oh, and I think the guy's name was Lorenzo or something. See the effect RL sports have on people? This is why we stick to video games!

*wipes blood from face, sighing*

 

[Shapsters]

Welcome to what I like to call, Internet Disneyland: The happiest place on the internet. Be friendly and if we see you troll once we will burn you at the stake so quickly YOU WONT EVEN-

Ahem...sorry.

Welcome!

[sup]Stay away from Max, who is the rabid raccoon and the dead body and a cynical bastard all in one![/sup]

 

[ErGo]

Why hello there

 

[Trivun]

If you're out getting more bodies then try this time to make sure they get preserved properly, last time the embalming fluid leaked everywhere, took us days to get it out of the carpet. Speaking of which, it's brand new this carpet so please for the love of God make sure you carry a few body bags with you. I'm not getting brain fluid anywhere this time...

No worries my friend, I've got some Tesco's own bin bags, and the wee buggers come preserved in buckfast. This job could get no easier. I'm even going to leave the hatchet in for comic effect/added warning.

Fair enough If you need any more hatchets try the shed out back. Otherwise, I have a sniper rifle you can borrow, although it doesn't really add the same level of fear...

You're too late, job's done! I put down a tarpaulin to save the carpet, and left a honey badger in the doorway just in case one of the little illiterate buggers gets brave.

Oh, and I think the guy's name was Lorenzo or something. See the effect RL sports have on people? This is why we stick to video games!

*wipes blood from face, sighing*

Very nice All bases covered, very efficient. Who taught you how to kill? They did an excellent job. Oh, by the way, you missed a spot of blood on your right cheek

 

[Fairee]

So that's who keeps ringing us then hanging up when I answer!

Yeah, sorry about that. I will now be official secretary, so I can answer the calls.

I find myself wondering what favours these could have been...

I think certain revelations about the sites i visit should answer that for you.....

 

[Mr Fatherland]

Where is Max anyway, he doesn't get involved much anymore. Not since...The Accident.

(There was no accident, I'm just saying it for the newbies to get a fear of Max. It's just healthy ya'know.)

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

So that's who keeps ringing us then hanging up when I answer!

Yeah, sorry about that. I will now be official secretary, so I can answer the calls.

I find myself wondering what favours these could have been...

I think certain revelations about the sites i visit should answer that for you.....

Oh we don't want to visit that again. It looks very odd on internet history.

I´m starting to be more and more convinced that Max isn´t a real person. Rather, it is an supranormal being born from constant derailment. It is, in fact, the thread derailing incarnate. It derails everything it touches. See for yourself; The guy isn´t even present (and hasn´t been for a while, as far as I know), but still he managed to derail this thread. Or more precisely, we are derailing this under its name. The end is near, I tell you.

Max is Tyler Durden.

Where is Max anyway, he doesn't get involved much anymore. Not since...The Accident.

(There was no accident, I'm just saying it for the newbies to get a fear of Max. It's just healthy ya'know.)

He wa suspended until yesterday. He's back now.

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

Dang it! Double post again