Hey! I didn't say that!

[username sucks]

From this point on, I own the Escapist and ban everyone from it. If you wish to challenge me you must beat me in a staring contest.*Stares intently*

Welp, there goes the last good place on the internet. Goodbye internet, you may be missed. Maybe.

 

[Teoes]

I'm going to set up my own website, called Escaper! It'll have Blackjack and hookers. Who's with me?!

Your idea for the name sucks almost as much as your username, but I am tempted by the notion of Blackjack and hookers.

 

[username sucks]

I just murdered a hooker and I am afraid the police will find out, but I am tempted to do it again.

Well thanks to your post, I think that the police will make that difficult decision for you.

 

[Fijiman]

I control the police, and the military, and the clown, and the tacos. I am unstoppable.

You monster!

 

[Neuromancer]

You can control me anytime.

Hot damn isn't username sucks popular.

 

[Teoes]

The thread went for one whole post without being misquoted into kinkiness and perversion, so I just had to fix that.

Well if nothing else there is a running theme here, right?

 

[Neuromancer]

I'm just jealous because username sucks will never notice me.

Dang he's REALLY popular around here.

 

[DyqstARD]

Dong is REALLY tasty around here.

Well that's just inappropriate.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Dong is REALLY tasty around here.

Finally, someone I can relate to!

We find soulmates in unexpected places.

 

[Teoes]

Mine is tastier than most. I rolled it in chilli and garlic this morning especially.

..no sale. +10 for effort and imagination though.

 

[EeveeElectro]

All of these bloody gay jokes people are making me wonder!

I agree!

 

[Euryalus]

*heavy vomiting noises*

Umm Eevee? You didn't eat that cheese in the fridge did you? Because it's like 3 years past the expiration date.

 

[HowEveryLoserPreaches]

Um Eevee? Could I have some of that rotten cheese? I'll pay big bucks.

Dude, how high are you?

 

[username sucks]

Dude, I'm like, so high right now it's like there's, there...there...just, whoa.

Ooookaay. Have fun, I guess.

 

[Kitsune Hunter]

Dude, I'm like, so high right now it's like there's, there...there...just, whoa.

So you smoke weed? What are you, casual? Heroin is hard-core and is the better drug.

Jeez, didn't know elitism existed in drug use

 

[Teoes]

Pah - I took drugs before drugs were cool.

I never had you pegged as a dirty hipster.

 

[EeveeElectro]

Going hipster shooting tonight, anyone wanna join me?

I think I'm washing my hair but make sure you get them in the eyes so they have to wear real glasses.

 

[Kitsune Hunter]

Going hipster shooting tonight, anyone wanna join me?

Oh shit, I'm a hipster, I don't want to die, but I'll probably walk away as running is too mainstream.

Are you sure it's a good idea to maintain your hipster pride in the face of death?

 

[Teoes]

I know you're not actually washing your hair. I have photos to prove it! It's obviously you, even with all the leaves in the way.

And I've got the photos to prove what you've been up to. How much is my silence worth?

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I don't understand the need for toilet paper.

Well, you see, its useful for cleaning things like spills and squashing bugs!