Honest and you

[Rickolas Walrus]

I like to feel I'm pretty honest about things 99% of the time. If my friend introduces me to one of this friends/the person he/she is trying to date, I'll let them know if I like them or not. Although I'd be more apt to telling little-white-lies to my girlfriend/wife/significant other as long as it wasn't earth shatteringly important in the long run. For example: I'd tell her I liked a dress when I really didn't if it were just something she bought for no real reason other than a party or just for kicks, but I'd let her know that I don't like it if she plans on using it for, say, a job interview or something

I do however have a "code" if you will about being as honest with someone as they are with me. I was, for the most part, completely honest with my ex girlfriend when we were dating (if you could call it that), but when I found out that basically everything about our relationship was a lie on her part, I made sure to make everything on my part a lie as well on the rare occasions we...uh..."tolerate each others company". If you're not going to be honest with me, then I'm not going to be honest with you

 

[Mikeyfell]

If you're enjoying telling the lies keep on trucking.

But if the conversation actually matters to you be honest.

You can't be a slave to someone else's feelings, otherwise what's the point.

I'm single by the way. So this isn't relationship advice, it's just general life advice.

 

[ThePenguinKnight]

Before answering any question or even making a statement, I consider three important factors:

1. Will life be easier if I lie?
2. What is the chance they will find out I am lying?
3. How do the current benefits weigh against the possibility of being discovered in the future?

I agree with this three step program.

 

[TheVioletBandit]

I think some people in this thread are confusing honesty with rudeness. It is perfectly possible to be gentle, kind, and honest. To the OP, you could tell her you don't really like her hair cut in a way which won't hurt her feelings. For example you could tell her you still think shes beautiful, but that it's not your favorite haircut that shes had. In this way your telling her the truth but also presenting it in a way that well have the lest negative emotional impact.

We shouldn't equate insensitivity with honesty as the two have little to do with one another.

 

[smithy_2045]

Being honest tends to be an excuse for people to be a dick. If your girlfriend gets a bad haircut, there's a difference between saying "damn your haircut is ugly ya ugly *****" and "im not really a fan of it, but you're still beautiful to me"

 

[T3hSource]

Surely,no matter how brutally honest you are,you have to consider the person you're talking to.Would they like the hard truth,will they accept it,how will they react to it?
Most of the time I'm very honest,too much in the world I live in for that matter and that usually ends up kicking me in the ass.
I also tend to hide truths,even if they're blatantly obvious,usually in those cases I know that it's just better not to attempt to lie.

 

[The Night Angel]

I practise near 100% honesty. I will tell white lies to avoid offending, or when something isn't my secret to tell, but apart from that, I never lie any more.