how to stay positive?

[Inkvizitorius]

I dont think there is any way to stay positive all the time its only natural there will be lots of ups and downs, but the best way I have found to get yourself out of a hole of despair is acceptance, accept that shit is going to happen and has happened but dont let it stain you accept that people will say bad things about you behind youre back and may possibly hate you it seems to be human nature to do such things.

Then once you have accepted it know that you can change it by fighting back if something in your life is strangling you get rid of it aim for somewhere you want to be and keep going even if you think you will never reach it and if you do aim higher and further keep pushing more and more but also dont do it because you want something physical do it because you want to improve yourself (i.e self mastery).

Strengthen your spirit think of everything as a chance to move forward and that you cannot be bowed or broken by anything that is thrown at you. Thats how I try and stay positive and it has worked pretty well despite some tough times.

Oh and whatever you do dont let yourself get trapped keep your lofty goal(s) in sight but set way markers towards it smaller goals if you will and aim to complete them as long as you keep pushing on following your path not erring from it you will hopefully be much happier as there is nothing like giving your life meaning and purpose rather than just existing.

apologies if that is a bit incoherent its a bit hard to describe abstract concepts but hopefully you get the gist of it.

You begun like a Nurgle worshiper, but ended up, like a true Tzeentch follower!

Anyway, well spoken and you should try to do that he says. Accept and abandom aspects, that hurt you. Overcome your weak links, habbits little by little. Abandon your treacherous friends one by one, find a way to distract your mind with hobbies. Find new friends among new circles there you would be accepted. (like in games clubs, MMORPGs and etc.) And most importantly, DO NOT SURRENDER! If you are getting beaten, go to gym, karate clubs and so on. Find a way and work for chance to overcome your problems.


BTW: yes, to move out would be most appropriate solution here. But first you must know, why? Because if you repeat the same mistakes again, you will end up in same situation as you are now.

 

[spacewalker]

What's an emo topic?
I hate it when people say this. This usually comes from the same type of people who say "money doesn't equal happiness". Fact is, first world countries often have higher suicide rates than third world ones. The way our society works puts immense amounts of pressure on people and pretty much breeds mental illness. Just cos you're doing fine economically, doesn't really mean anything.

There are lots of reasons why "money doesn't equal happiness", and it is directly tied to how society works and why people oftem are being preassured. I feel it is an important phrase to have in mind since your sucsess will often be measured on flawed flawed premises, how much money you have.
Dont mean to say that money is not nessicary to keep yourself alive, but working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

as for the first and third world suicide rates, not all that many third world countries actually keep track of suicides, sometimes because far more people are dying of oter reasons, like war, untreated diseases, and hunger.

 

[Rooster893]

<youtube=TqGYUszT804>

This song always puts me in a good mood when I'm feeling down. Hope this helps, bro.

 

[Biosophilogical]

Fake it 'til you make it.

Obviously it isn't all you should do, but being downtrodden and depressed will make it harder to make friends, make it harder to bother doing anything productive, and it is possible you could burn-out from lack of emotional fuel. So if you really want to get out of your bad head-space, you need to pretend that you are, even if you are the only one that doesn't believe it. If you put pretending to be happy first, you'll be more likely to make good first impressions, you'll be productive (maybe get a hands-on hobby), and eventually, one day, you'll realise that you are actually enjoying all these little things (ad that day may be a week from now, a month or a year .... maybe more, but the point is to try, because you don't get out of downward spirals by turning off your engines and letting gravity take over.

OT: As for an example. When I started uni, it was such a radical shift from high school, and most of my friends were at other unis, or TAFEs, or had jobs, and most of my classes were so big that it was hard to make new friends. I slumped, and I slumped hard. This semester, I put myself out there, pretended to know what I was doing (socially and academically), and you know what? It worked! I've made 10 new friends, I'm going to all my classes, I'm generally happy, and while I still may be a teenager dealing with the emotional side of his hormones, I'm doing loads better than I was last semester, and it is all because even though I was (and am) unsure, worried, over-whelmed, a little scared, and more than a little insecure at times, I pulled my finger out, said "Screw feeling this way" and made myself appear like I was the man I wanted myself to be, even if I'm not there yet.

 

[AnarchistFish]

working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

who are you to judge that?

 

[Loonyyy]

OP, I've been feeling the same way you do, due to some similar reasons. There is no such thing as staying positive. Anyone who tells you to should get donkey kicked in the face for suggesting it. There is no way to think yourself happy. If life gets you down, well, thats what it does, and it sucks. But, on the flipside, you can do the things in life that you enjoy, listen to the music that you like, watch the films you like, play video games, hang with friends, and all of these things are things that make you happy. If on the balance, you're as happy as you are sad, well, at least you're content, and the good moments have a comparison of drudgery to help them stand out. As for how to get the motivation back, I don't know. My energy has been shot of late, and I've been insomniac and tired, and am almost to the point of motivating myself through pharmaceuticals, meaning sleeping pills for the insomnia and caffiene to wake me up and get me going. Which is a really bad way to be going.

Just live the best you can, and don't mope. Take things as they come. Don't pretend to be happy. That's a horrible feeling. Just don't let unpleasant emotions consume you.

 

[funguy2121]

Disclaimer : This is not an EMO topic and pathetic lame posters can go F** themselves politely

moving away will seriously help. not much else you can do.
and uh...
its a really cheery show, so try watching it. it might cheer you up...

Somebody doesn't read before he posts. Why recommend a show for little girls to to a grown man to pull himself out of his self pity and suicide threats?

OP, your first line and the rest of your post completely contradict each other. You're in college, so I take it you're at least 19, right? Your OP looks like it was written by a very pissed off 13 year old. This is the most helpful thing I can sincerely tell you: grow up. Stop acting like a child. Life sucks. Deal with it and stop asking others to save you "for a year." It really will help.

 

[Alssadar]

Try doing something to make you important- slight amounts of arrogance have made me realize that I'm an important person, and that if I were gone, it would be a problem. Therefore, I am an essential part of the world I live in, and thus, I can stay happy knowing I have a purpose. (which, at the current moment, is playing Bass 4 in a Drum line)

 

[HardkorSB]

Disclaimer : This is not an EMO topic and pathetic lame posters can go F** themselves politely

How does one stay positive if ones entire life has been A spiral of misery?
This I mean from enduring verbal and physical abuse as a kid (Read daily beatings at home and at school)
To standing a shanking in a public room
To the passing away of friends via suicide
to 3 years of friendship and okayish life (filled with sickness like cancer still)
Back to a downwards spiral of daily having to hear that everybody hates you
Knowing that people are blatantly lying to your face
and just openly being betrayed
Losing the motivation for the college you worked for so hard to get in
and just going "Fuck all I could just die right? " whenever you're alone in the dark too long
(But being smart enough to not actually do it, just tormented by the idea)


if Someone could help me think of a way to regain my positive stance for a year that might be mighty fine

After that I'm movign away anyway to start over somewhere else

Been there, done that. You'll get over it.
Honestly, stand in front of a mirror, slap yourself in the face as hard as you can, look at yourself and say: "Stop being such a pussy!"
Repeat until you've had enough.

working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

who are you to judge that?

As a person who has done both of these jobs, I say that he's right. If not having a fun and respectable job is enough to make you kill yourself then go ahead and make room for someone who actually wants that job.

 

[AnarchistFish]

working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

who are you to judge that?

As a person who has done both of these jobs, I say that he's right. If not having a fun and respectable job is enough to make you kill yourself then go ahead and make room for someone who actually wants that job.

I think you miss my point. It's the idea that people have of what does and doesn't justify unhappiness that's the fundamental problem. Sure, maybe it isn't a good reason, but people can't really help what the effect of their experiences on them is.

 

[spacewalker]

working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

who are you to judge that?

judge?
I'm saying its not for other people to argue that having this kind of a job would make somone worthless. Exerting the kind of pressure society puts on you that you metioned in your first post.

 

[GoddyofAus]

Not giving a shit about anything has proven to be quite useful for me.

 

[AnarchistFish]

working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

who are you to judge that?

judge?
I'm saying its not for other people to argue that having this kind of a job would make somone worthless. Exerting the kind of pressure society puts on you that you metioned in your first post.

It doesn't read like that?

 

[HardkorSB]

working at a cash register or as a janitor should really not be an argument for killing yourself.

who are you to judge that?

As a person who has done both of these jobs, I say that he's right. If not having a fun and respectable job is enough to make you kill yourself then go ahead and make room for someone who actually wants that job.

I think you miss my point. It's the idea that people have of what does and doesn't justify unhappiness that's the fundamental problem. Sure, maybe it isn't a good reason, but people can't really help what the effect of their experiences on them is.

Yeah, sure. Some person may look at a leaf falling from a tree and cry about the end of it's life. That's a kind of mental illness, in my opinion.
I can't feel sorry for someone killing himself over not having his dreamjob. I can pity him, I can also make fun of him a bit but that's about it.

 

[M-E-D The Poet]

Disclaimer : This is not an EMO topic and pathetic lame posters can go F** themselves politely

moving away will seriously help. not much else you can do.
and uh...
its a really cheery show, so try watching it. it might cheer you up...

Somebody doesn't read before he posts. Why recommend a show for little girls to to a grown man to pull himself out of his self pity and suicide threats?

OP, your first line and the rest of your post completely contradict each other. You're in college, so I take it you're at least 19, right? Your OP looks like it was written by a very pissed off 13 year old. This is the most helpful thing I can sincerely tell you: grow up. Stop acting like a child. Life sucks. Deal with it and stop asking others to save you "for a year." It really will help.

that first line was more of a "FLAME SHIELD ACTIVATE" knowing the usual census this forum applies

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

It could be worse, you could be dead. You may be afflicted, morose and despondant, but you still have plenty of time for things to yet improve. I know this will propably be largely platitudinous and innefectual, yet I still think it'll be more heplful then the wave of haughty condescention and general 'get over it and cheer the fuck up!' kind of retorts these threads can generate.

 

[beniki]

Disclaimer : This is not an EMO topic and pathetic lame posters can go F** themselves politely

How does one stay positive if ones entire life has been A spiral of misery?
This I mean from enduring verbal and physical abuse as a kid (Read daily beatings at home and at school)
To standing a shanking in a public room
To the passing away of friends via suicide
to 3 years of friendship and okayish life (filled with sickness like cancer still)
Back to a downwards spiral of daily having to hear that everybody hates you
Knowing that people are blatantly lying to your face
and just openly being betrayed
Losing the motivation for the college you worked for so hard to get in
and just going "Fuck all I could just die right? " whenever you're alone in the dark too long
(But being smart enough to not actually do it, just tormented by the idea)


if Someone could help me think of a way to regain my positive stance for a year that might be mighty fine

After that I'm movign away anyway to start over somewhere else

The same thing anyone should do if they suffer a disappointment.

Hard work. Work yourself to the bone. Make yourself so damn tired you can't feel a thing, and you just collapse in a heap at night.

After a few weeks of that, you probably have achieved something to pick yourself up. And if not, then you'll have a nice thick bonus cheque.

And for the gaps in between working like a dog, well, there's always video games and alcohol.

 

[Danik93]

ze snippity

Just listen to this... seriously it's impossible to not feel good when listening tho this song!

<youtube=MjRnpV5TIaA>

 

[Minjoltr]

Your story sounds a lot like that of a friend of mine so I would suggest -

Move.

Abandon everyone who isn't a positive influence in your life. Meet new friends. Do new things. If people dislike you for it, forget them, it's not up to them. Rise above it. If you feel someone's been lying to you, get confrontational, if they hate you for it, have you really lost anything?

If college isn't feeling right, go and see someone about it - department staff, tutors, guidance counsellor, there will be someone who can advise you. Change your modules, change your major, go to different clubs. If you're not there yet, you might be able to postpone it for a year to get things worked out. If you've just started, the first term's rough on everyone.

Find a hobby, take up a sport, everyone says exercise helps lift one's mood.

Fuck it.

Buy a kilt.