I feel like a f***ing idiot...

[Smeggs]

People wearing haz-mat suits came to my door, and told me to wait outside because they had to tear-gas out the stray dog in my attic. I have an dog in my attic so I believed them. 30 minutes later they walked out with "bags of animal carcasses," which I later find out to be my ps3, wii, dvd player, and a bunch of jewelry. Didn't think that robberies could be so planned, but now my parents are mad at me. Now I can only afford a 360 which really annoys me.

Shouldn't the fact that you have a single dog in the attic have tipped you off when they came out with multiple bags?

What the hell did you think? That they hacked up the dead dog's body to fit it in the bags? And you don't wear hazmat suits for tear gas, nor do you use tear gas to get an animal, animal control would have sent someone over.

Sorry, but if you derped this hard it's sort of hard to feel sorry for you.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

If this is true, wow.

If this isn't true, wow. All these responses.

 

[Darh Abdomino]

I think we're moving past the important part. Why/how did a dog get in your attic? I'm given to understand those aren't readily accessible.

 

[Guardian of Nekops]

Wow, that was pretty well organized. sucks that it happened to you, but the only advice I can offer to you to take from this is this:

Anytime someone comes to your door that you have not specifically called, it doesn't matter if they are wearing hazmat or police blues, ask for ID, if they refuse to offer ID, they are frauds and you can tell them where to go and how fast to get there.

Not only should they have ID (which you may or may not be able to tell is genuine) but they should have a warrant (if police) and a work order (if other sorts of professionals), all of which they are required to show you before you have to let them in. If you didn't call them, or your parents didn't, they should ALSO have a warrant, of sorts... something from the mayor/apartment complex/whatever saying you have to let them in.

Unfortunately, you won't know what any of this stuff looks like, either, but if what they show you looks fishy then don't be afraid to tell them to leave. The people who NEED to get in there will be able to do it despite you, and they'll convince you.

 

[Darren716]

If this is real you should email your storry to Screwattack.com, they have a podcast and one of the segments is crazy news stories and this will beright up their ally. Also if you live in Florida they will deffinetly put your story on. OK on topic, this realy sucks that this happened to you, but why didn't you report the stay dog in your attick to animal control?

 

[Nouw]

I just know someone is going to try this an end up being on Cracked.com.

 

[Captain Booyah]

Know what I think?

I think that OP wasn't really robbed at all, and he's just testing out his theft idea on the Internet and seeing how plausible it is. That guy's gonna plant a Jack Russell in some poor sap's attic. And now you've told him that he needs documentation and that professionals wouldn't use tear gas! LOOK AT WHAT YOUR SUGGESTIONS ARE DOING, ESCAPISTS! SOMEBODY'S GOING TO HAVE A MOTHERFUCKING XBOX BECAUSE OF YOU

Spoiler: I rest my case. *adjusts sunglasses*

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

...the lot of you know this is false and the OP is a troll, right?

The people continue to believe it. I'm quite incredulous about this whole scenario.

In other words this is in order. [http://www.gifsoup.com/view/1028266/successful-troll-o.gif]

 

[Chromanin]

When I opened this thread, my eyes keyed on the words "people wearing hazmat suits" and "ps3, wii," and I thought, "This is going to be painful to read." After reading the last line though, "Now I can only afford a 360 which annoys me," I'm pretty confident I just got taken for a ride. Bravo.

However, in all seriousness, kids, NEVER let anyone force his way into your house, ESPECIALLY if they claim to be some kind of authority figure. Unless your house is currently on fire, stop them, ask for ID, make a huge stink about the whole scenario, call the cops, or if they threaten to call the cops, call their bluff. Worst that can happen is the cops actually do show up.

... And why the hell was there a stray dog in your attic?

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

One time this scraggly looking guy with long greasy hair came to my door and explained he needed to confirm the diameter of my anus as there was apparently a disease going around causing enlargened anuses.

Naturally I let him have a go. He said I had nothing to worry about and that mine was nice and tight. I wouldn't know for sure though since he wouldn't let me see what he was doing.

Oh, sorry about that. I just have nothing to do in the day anymore since I lost my job as the wallet inspector. At least I have warms hands though, right?...

My friend bought a laptop from currys a few days ago. The list price was 350, she spent closer to 600 because the salesman did a pro con job on her. Shouldn't trust anyone.

how many days?

if it's in the last 10 I think she can go and ..... kick em' in the nuts
or just ask for her money back

No can do. She bought it the day she was leaving for Croatia for a couple of months.

I told her to tell me if she was going to buy anything, so that I could accompany her and stop exactly this kind of thing from happening.

 

[Rule Britannia]

That's too bad
Well I guess you'll probably be more cautious in the future :S

 

[Deric Wadleigh]

You know what's hilarious about this? If this was true, no police officer would ever believe this report.

 

[cthulhumythos]

maybe.. maybe the dog ATE your stuff. and then it had an allergic reaction to the tear gas (which is totally standard animal control gear. as well as hazmat suits) and exploded. they then spent the next half hour cleaning up dog giblets in your house. hazmat suited, tear gas equipped, freelance animal control providers are the REAL heroes today. and you accuse them. tsk tsk.

alright, if this is a legit story- wow. that's.... that's quite the story. at least you'll have something to tell your kids!

 

[Matt9102]

maybe.. maybe the dog ATE your stuff. and then it had an allergic reaction to the tear gas (which is totally standard animal control gear. as well as hazmat suits) and exploded. they then spent the next half hour cleaning up dog giblets in your house. hazmat suited, tear gas equipped, freelance animal control providers are the REAL heroes today. and you accuse them. tsk tsk.

This seems most plausible.
Anyway, you are a troll among trolls. Bravo.

 

[sky14kemea]

...the lot of you know this is false and the OP is a troll, right?

Sssshhhh! You're ruining the illusioooooon!

It probably is fake, but even then, it's a fun kinda topic to discuss! =P

 

[OldNewNewOld]

Fake.
This is just a variation of the "Owl in the attic" story.
This should be closed asap.

 

[Sangreal Gothcraft]

yeah that is how i feel as well..then i find out we have been trolled -_-

 

[WaffleCopters]

at least you werent like "derp, didnt know i had a dog up there, but OK "

 

[The Pinray]

I don't get it... You are joking, right? There's no way on Gia's green earth that you're serious.

You story is very suspect, friend. I'm not sure I buy it.

 

[Nouw]

...the lot of you know this is false and the OP is a troll, right?

Sssshhhh! You're ruining the illusioooooon!

It probably is fake, but even then, it's a fun kinda topic to discuss! =P

Seconded. I'm thinking of a smart way to double-cross them. Ideas anyone?