I need some advice.

[Matt'TheBean'Hooper]

i put this in the wrong place last time...
It seems as no one i know uses this site this is the best place to ask this.
So im seeing this girl and shes moved away to america (I live in england) last year we were going out for 6 years.
But anyway she messaged me on facebook earliar, She'd taken alot of antidepressents 22 in total so I spent the last 2 hours trying to convince her to not slice her wrists. so I finaly got her to stop taking the pills and not to cut her self, but now im so worried I cant concentrate on anything, I cant stop shaking, But my main problem is that i cant go and see her not for a few months anyway, and I know that she's gunna do it again, so can anyone help me out here i need something taht i can say or do to make sure she doesnt do it again, I love her so much I cant loose her, so yeah i would realy like some advice. Thank you

 

[GigaHz]

Sounds like she's an attention whore or an emotional vampire.

Hate to be blunt but it's true.

Maybe the reason why she's doing these things is not so much to hurt herself, but to get attention from you knowing that you care about her well being.

Call me cold, and it might be a complete change of character on your part, but I'd tell her to stop playing games and to smarten up. Tell her that it's not fair for her to play around with your emotions, and that you will only speak to her again if she is ready to discuss SOLUTIONS to her problems and not further problems.

Seriously. She is taking advantage of the fact that you have known her for a long period of time. Do not become a dumping ground for her mopey bullshit. Be there for her ONLY if she is going to be there for herself. And if she isn't, not your problem.

 

[Matt'TheBean'Hooper]

I wish i could say that your right but I cant she was trying to realy hurt herself.

 

[Genericjim101]

Girl is crazy, do not be afraid to voice how her actions also make you feel. If she gets rageful at that then it's obviously a one way issue in her mind. The least that can be given in return for effort and caring is a bit of effort and consideration back, empathy should work both ways.

 

[GigaHz]

I have been in my share of situations like that.

You need to stand up for yourself. Whether or not she is hurting herself is irrelevant. She needs to be aware that by her choosing to hurt (or threatening to hurt) herself, it is having a negative effect on you. So give her a choice.

If she wants help, figure something out. If she wants to talk, let her speak. But if she's just going to threaten you with action and pull on your heart strings, man up and leave her to her own drama. Make her aware that you demand respect and she will change her tune. Mark my words.

 

[Matt'TheBean'Hooper]

the thing is she alwasy looks after everyone else but never takes the time to look after herself and now its just all built up i try and do all that i can for her, it was easier when she lived here, she was never afraid to ask how anything made me feel. Its not like she's trying o get attention, if i wasnt there to talk to her and stop her, i think she would have killed herself, i was just talking to her and she seems a bit better, but i realy need to go see her.