Im a guy but just keep being their for her. She may say she doesn't want to see anyone but soon enough she will want someone to talk to or just to be with. Don't be too pushy though.
I need some help from the girls!
- Thread starter PurpleLeafRave
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And that detour was necessary... why? I understand the "There are no girls on the internet" is a tired and overused meme, but still...Labyrinth said:
"waves at Tehpwnsauce and points at boobs" Hi!!! Girl on the forum, don't die of shock.Tehpwnsauce said:
Topic wise- If you have already let her know that you are there for her and she can reach you anytime, just give her some space to figure things for herself out. She will get back to you when she is ready to talk.
The thing is, nothing like this has happened before, we've only been together a month and a bit.kiyeshi said:
I recommend that you shag somebody easy while she's busy. Yeaaaaaaaaaah! Woop woop, get in there my son!
No, really I'm only joking lol. I think you should leave her alone, there's nothing more annoying than somebody who won't leave you to yourself at a time like that, even if they are just being kind.
No, really I'm only joking lol. I think you should leave her alone, there's nothing more annoying than somebody who won't leave you to yourself at a time like that, even if they are just being kind.
Again, not a girl here, but I've dealt a lot of people who are in depressive states and most of my friends used to be girls. Give her a little room at first, a week or so to herself. Feel free to send her the odd (and I do mean odd) email, message, letter, text, whatever to let her know you're there for her. At this point in time she's going through something highly personal and needs to have a little escape for a while, which is fine. Your job at this point is to let her know you're there if she needs a talk and that you're going to be a person who will be there to hold her and be there for her even if she doesn't want a talk and needs a shoulder to cry on.
From that point you try and get her out of the house a little bit more, ask her to come around your house when it's just you two, grab a duvet, stick it on the sofa, watch your TV and curl up with her so that there's no need to talk unless she wants to, let her come out of her own shell at her own pace, just be a safe little escape from the world when she needs it. Then you can start trying to gentle coax her into a talk if she needs it, but for the most part everything should be on her terms right now; push too hard and you'll only be a reminder of what's going on in her life.
I see you've only been together for a short while, so don't be frustrated if she can't talk to you; sometimes you need someone totally anonymous and not involved to talk to when in these situations and she just might not like you knowing how distraught she is at this point. Be supportive, give her time, try to encourage but don't push, and through the whole thing let her feel she has control over what's happening between you two; she's lost control over what's happening in her own home, don't try to force her into something when she's not ready and make her lose control over that aspect of her life too.
Blah, that's all I can say over the subject. I obviously don't know either of you so my advice is general and sweeping at best; you know her more than we do, try to figure out as much as you can yourself.
From that point you try and get her out of the house a little bit more, ask her to come around your house when it's just you two, grab a duvet, stick it on the sofa, watch your TV and curl up with her so that there's no need to talk unless she wants to, let her come out of her own shell at her own pace, just be a safe little escape from the world when she needs it. Then you can start trying to gentle coax her into a talk if she needs it, but for the most part everything should be on her terms right now; push too hard and you'll only be a reminder of what's going on in her life.
I see you've only been together for a short while, so don't be frustrated if she can't talk to you; sometimes you need someone totally anonymous and not involved to talk to when in these situations and she just might not like you knowing how distraught she is at this point. Be supportive, give her time, try to encourage but don't push, and through the whole thing let her feel she has control over what's happening between you two; she's lost control over what's happening in her own home, don't try to force her into something when she's not ready and make her lose control over that aspect of her life too.
Blah, that's all I can say over the subject. I obviously don't know either of you so my advice is general and sweeping at best; you know her more than we do, try to figure out as much as you can yourself.
She probably does appreciate what you are doing but just isn't showing it. Otherwise I have no idea what you could do.
Though I remember when my parents got divorced and it being one of the best things to ever happen to my family as my Mum finally got rid of my piece of shit Father.
So I find it hard to relate to people who devastated by parents divorcing.
Though I remember when my parents got divorced and it being one of the best things to ever happen to my family as my Mum finally got rid of my piece of shit Father.
So I find it hard to relate to people who devastated by parents divorcing.
this may be a it harsh but i think she needs to get over it. it's bad that her parent's may split up but she isn't the only one in that boat. my parent's broke up when i was little (well, 6 months old) but i still saw my dad on a regular basis. it's not the end of the world but it will take some time for her to adjust.
This is by no means serious but did you consider storming her house, and slamming her parents into the walls until they forget about breaking up? that could cheer her up.....
Tehpwnsauce said:
Sigel said:
*ZOMFG there's more than one! It's an invasion!*Labyrinth said:
/sarcasm
OT: IMO I think it's best that you be there for her as much as you can. That way she has a shoulder to lean/cry on. However if she wants some space then give her some room to breathe, yet still be within reaching distance in case she needs a hug.
But what do I know? I'm apparently something that doesn't exist in cyberspace.
EDIT: *points at Tehpwnsauce* We do exist. We are here. And we don't like it when you say we aren't.
As a girl, and someone who's parents are going through the whole "splitting up" thing right now too, the best I can recommend is to give her the space she needs, but make sure she knows you care.
It's a pretty confusing time, so she probably doesn't know how to react. Try and be normal with her; don't keep asking "are you ok" or "do you want to talk about it". The best you can do for her is be ready to listen when she is ready to talk about it
It's a pretty confusing time, so she probably doesn't know how to react. Try and be normal with her; don't keep asking "are you ok" or "do you want to talk about it". The best you can do for her is be ready to listen when she is ready to talk about it
To be honest if you keep pushing, something will snap. Give her space, let her know you're there if she needs you and be patient.
Hey, first make sure she knows that your giving her some space so she doesn't think that everyone she loves is abandoning her. If you just up and leave, or stop trying suddenly, she might mistake that for you giving up on her.
Anyway, this is more of a normal problem, than a problem that can only be solved by women and effeminate men.
Anyway, this is more of a normal problem, than a problem that can only be solved by women and effeminate men.