"If you can't say anything Nice, don't say anything at all."

[000Ronald]

My grandmother used to tell me the same thing all the time when I was little; apparently every word I said as a child was offensive to someone. Which was weird, because she was the only person who seemed to mind.

On the other hand, most of the things she said I found offensive or hurtful. So maybe she just wanted to be the only person who could offend people.

The moral of the story, kids, is that you shouldn't do things just because people tell you to.

'pologies.

 

[TWRule]

The saying is a platitude. There obviously times when something that's not particularly "nice" has to be said. Of course, that doesn't excuse people who show zero tact, but that's a separate issue.

 

[Sinclair Solutions]

This is advice that I feel is terribly ignored in today's society, or at least the parts I have seen. Everyone is just so eager to "tell it like it is" or to prove their superiority over someone, that they have no consideration for other people's feelings anymore. I wish people would just keep their douchy comments to themselves, or at least learn how to phrase it in away that doesn't make the person you are talking to feel inadequate.

 

[Vykrel]

i heard that saying once again a few days ago, and actually came up with an alternative...

"If you can't say anything nice, they probably have it coming."

 

[lacktheknack]

A better, more updated version is "If it can't be said tactfully, it isn't worth saying."

 

[lacktheknack]

I so wish there was a way to blank post on the Escapist right now. XD

You do this: ...

Or this: <color=white>Nasty Words

 

[SimuLord]

That maxim is basically the diplomatic way of saying "Dude, don't be a dick" and is still as worthwhile now as it was 60 years ago.

 

[Astoria]

I think that saying means more don't say something mean for the sake of being mean that what it says. Most of the time I will keep my mouth shut but if someone is just being a flat out dick I'll say something. Sometimes people need a few insults to realise that they're just pissing people off.

 

[WolfThomas]

I find I do this all the time...when it comes to some attractive women. My mind's like "Her logic is faulty, she's misinformed, must fix!" and then my penis is like "Woah slow down a minute, she's hot man, come on!". So I end up with me murmuring something like "Oh really?".

But yeah whenever I criticise someone I try to double check I'm correct and be as tactful as possible.

 

[Mimssy]

That maxim is basically the diplomatic way of saying "Dude, don't be a dick" and is still as worthwhile now as it was 60 years ago.

Everything is made better by the "Don't be a dick" rule.

 

[Negatempest]

Saying a movie is terrible is being a dick. Saying a book is terrible is being a dick. You are honest, but you still are degrading a piece of work that took time to create. Could we lie about how we enjoyed Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (I loved it personally). Could you tell your friends that Michael Bay's Transformers was a great homage to the original? Would you say the Twilight series is an "interesting" read? No, for quite a few of us we want to say that most of these are a piece of ****. We would want our siblings to know that it is a piece of ****.

To me the saying is too..incomplete. There is more that has to be added, but could only be added through experience. This is why I could never tell my younger brothers this saying if it is something so incomplete because it would just confuse them when applied to life experiences.

 

[RowdyRodimus]

Well Yahtzee would certainly be outta the job.

Then can it become a mandatory law throughout the universe? Please?

 

[Sarah Frazier]

It's pretty much an old way of trying to make people think twice before saying something and becoming an accidental troll. Unfortunately it's still up to the person to decide how much they want to sugar coat negative thoughts or make them as hurtful as possible. Rather than teach my kids to only say nice things or nothing at all, I'd rather they take a moment to find a positive suggestion to go with a negative observation.

 

[Super Toast]

The saying holds no water in this thing called "Real Life".

 

[Kortney]

I don't think the saying was meant to be looked at with this much scrutiny. It's just a fluffy little saying which has simple good will and politeness behind it. It's basically saying "don't be nasty". Of course there are a few things wrong with it, I'm sure the writer realised this too.

 

[Hader]

The guy in my avatar once said "I follow two rules: 1. Never kill someone without a reason.
2. You can always find a reason to kill someone."

Point being here that sayings like this are never universal no matter how much you want them to be. There are exceptions, whether we like them or not. Two sides of the coin, they may appear to be the same but they are always going to face in opposite directions.

 

[CouchCommando]

An example of some one ignoring the saying "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."
A cousin that we hadn't seen in some time, well over a decade went out of her way to visit my parents. We all had a joyful reunion, and reminisced about old times growing up in the same rural town together, when I inquired about my uncles health, she made the observation that he was eating junk as only a concerned daughter can.
....then my social retard isolationist pessimistic father then went into a put down session about how disgusting he behaved when he was a child (this is her father he was talking about) and brought up an incident from some 50 years ago (25 years before she was even born)!!! when his (my uncles) mother served him a burnt meal and he put it in the compost and made himself a sandwich.
Like er *crickets* no point ,full of venom and seriously exposing my father for what he is.
A venomous douche of no peer.

 

[supermariner]

nah that saying is bollocks
people need to be critisised (contructively, not just for the sake of it)
if i don't realise that what i'm doing is shit
i need to be told
so i can try and improve ... or choose not to
either way, the information that i'm shit is important and may or may not be acted upon, but isn't pleasant to hear. but is necessary to know

You should
stop hitting
the
enter key so often.

I'm giving constructive criticism.

Ah but see it's the manner in which you stated it that takes it from constructive criticism to just plain criticism. Something that can be taken as rude.

Had you simply said: Hitting the enter key so often makes your text hard to read. Well then it would hard to find that insulting. Which makes it constructive.

Thank you for giving me constructive criticism on my not-so-constructive criticism. XD

aha sorry it's just my way of writing things. But i would never have known it annoyed you if i weren't pulled up on it. i'm glad you told me what i didn't want to hear. You see? This not saying anything nice thing has just been proven twash through the means of an unwitting tag-team of us

 

[Sn1P3r M98]

i heard that saying once again a few days ago, and actually came up with an alternative...

"If you can't say anything nice, they probably have it coming."

I like that. From now on, I'm gonna counter with that.