I'm scared.

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The Stonker

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Feb 26, 2009
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Well escapists.
I want to tell you guys something, because I have no other place to turn to.
Now what happend was that I suffered a mental breakdown just reccently.
I suffered a mental breakdown because I realized that people only use me as a person to search to, the person who they can "talk to".
When I had a girl come to me and tell me about an issue that she had then I just finally burst into tears.
I don't know why I burst into tears, I really don't, but on that moment I just needed someone to actually be there, and guess what she did?
She looked at me awkwardly and wandered off.
Now you people will probably find this silly, but I've never had anyone to be able to look to except for reccently.
For I've lived most of my days well, alone.
When I was a child then I could never play with the other children because well, they liked shoving me into the dirt and beating me up.
I'm sorry escapists if I bothered you, I'm really depressed and I've been really depressed the last year and I've considered suicide.
Good day and thank you for reading.
J.A
 

Jedoro

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Jun 28, 2009
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People are overrated, to be honest. My advice would be to find a source of validation in yourself, get to where you don't need other people to be happy, or at the very least content. Once you can do without them, it's easier to make friends because you won't come off as clingy at all.

At the risk of sounding like a broken record, "It'll be alright in the end. If it's not alright, it's not the end." Hang in there.
 
Apr 19, 2010
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TheYellowCellPhone said:
Bullshit.

People listen, you just found one sour grape that one time you wanted sweet wine.

And considering suicide? "What are you -- a man or a mouse?"
Aww I wanted to say something like that. Why can't people ever consider my feelings? I think I'm going to go be depressed in my corner now.
 

Jonluw

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May 23, 2010
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Sounds like what that girl did was rather dickish, yes. I suggest you talk to someone other than her about your issues.

I don't really know what else to say though.

Edit: If it makes you feel any better: There are a lot of us that feel like crap a lot of the time. I actually had a rather bad day today.
 

The Afrodactyl

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Jul 19, 2010
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Don't commit suicide, man...

Let's face it even if you don't value your life, as you clearly said: people come to you as someone they can talk to.

People obviously see you as kind, helpful and trustworthy.

It's obviously just the stress of being relied upon in such a way - I've had it too.
Just take a few minutes to think about all the good you've done for these people, just by sitting and listening to them.

From your description, you sound like a very, very nice person. And this world needs as many of those as possible.
 

Private Custard

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Dec 30, 2007
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I've been toying with the whole suicide thing for about a decade now, I even know how I'd do it.

But you know what, you just have to be too fucking stubborn to do it. Keep saying to yourself "fuck it, I'm not going out like that", and keep soldiering on. My breakdown was back in 2002 and things have gradually improved since then, but not quite to the point I'm actually enjoying being here.

Do the opposite of what I did, try talking to a professional........and try the pills they offer you instead of flushing them down the toilet.

Keep fighting. It takes a fair amount of time to fall into a huge hole, it takes time to get out of that hole. Don't do anything rash in the meantime.
 

Furious Styles

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Jul 10, 2010
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The Stonker said:
When I had a girl come to me and tell me about an issue that she had then I just finally burst into tears.
I don't know why I burst into tears, I really don't, but on that moment I just needed someone to actually be there, and guess what she did?
She looked at me awkwardly and wandered off.
Cruel though it may seem, that is a pretty reasonable response to someone bursting into tears for no apparent reason. Its what I'd do. i'd feel bad later and maybe ask them about it, but at the time I'd be pretty uncomfortable and i wouldn't know what to do.

And if she came to you, maybe she considers you a friend. Why not go to her, instead of just bursting into tears?
 

Mastercylinder

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Jun 27, 2010
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I really don't like to be involved in personal matters but, c'mon man don't kill yourself over people's ignorance. Same kinda things happen to me. It's better to just ignore what other people think of you and move on with your own personal goals. Don't let stupid people drag you down with the rest of them.
 

Dango

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Feb 11, 2010
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To be honest, I kinda wish I was in your position. Being the person that everyone could just comfortably talk sounds really nice... to me at least.

As for your problem, something that always keeps me form being depressed is that I remember that sadness is only a passing thing. It comes and goes, and every time it goes you're left feeling even happier than before it came. Try to keep that in mind.
 

Imp Poster

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Sep 16, 2010
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Sorry, but I am not getting what you mean. So you are tired of being used as an "ear"?

"but I've never had anyone to be able to look to except for reccently."

What does this mean? Is reccently a ID name of someone?

It seems you have a problem you can't describe or haven't said in your OP. You should just let it out if not here then someplace. Sounds like you have something on your chest and you want to get it off.
 

TraderJimmy

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Apr 17, 2010
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Weird, I had fmylife.com open in another tab.

Anyway, yeah. This is not true. People don't "use you as a guy they can talk to". People are, in general, surprisingly honest and emotional with each other, and sometimes if you have friends your friends will be honest and emotional with you.

This is part of the privilege of friendship.

Depression/suicide the only advice I can give is don't self-medicate, and try to live as clean and healthy a life as possible for a while. Lame advice perhaps but give it a couple of months and it should start to work. If it doesn't, see a doctor.
 

Erana

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Feb 28, 2008
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TheYellowCellPhone said:
Bullshit.

People listen, you just found one sour grape that one time you wanted sweet wine.

And considering suicide? "What are you -- a man or a mouse?"
You do realise that most people don't respond well to the, "Stop whining and just deal with it" mentality, right? A comment like this is the kind of thing that would help put a person over the edge.

The Stonker said:
Well escapists.
I want to tell you guys something, because I have no other place to turn to.
Now what happend was that I suffered a mental breakdown just reccently.
I suffered a mental breakdown because I realized that people only use me as a person to search to, the person who they can "talk to".
When I had a girl come to me and tell me about an issue that she had then I just finally burst into tears.
I don't know why I burst into tears, I really don't, but on that moment I just needed someone to actually be there, and guess what she did?
She looked at me awkwardly and wandered off.
Now you people will probably find this silly, but I've never had anyone to be able to look to except for reccently.
For I've lived most of my days well, alone.
When I was a child then I could never play with the other children because well, they liked shoving me into the dirt and beating me up.
I'm sorry escapists if I bothered you, I'm really depressed and I've been really depressed the last year and I've considered suicide.
Good day and thank you for reading.
J.A
If you're randomly bursting into tears, and have been feeling like this for a long time, you may well have some physical problem that's messing with your emotions. I strongly believe that depression should be treated as a symptom rather than a diagnosis in itself- I suggest you go to the doctor and have all your labs taken. If you're deficient in something or are more sensitive to certain chemicals than the general population, it could very well be what's getting you so down. I'm hypersensitive to certain hormones, and I'm a wreck if they're not regulated.
Not to say that being other peoples' rock isn't a burden, but it shouldn't be driving you to a state of disphoria. It could be a contributing factor, though I suspect something larger's at play.
 

Stormz

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Jul 4, 2009
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It was a normal response, I wouldn't feel very comfortable if I walked up to you and you burst into tears. You don't have anything to be depressed about in this situation. People think of you as trustworthy and kind enough for them to tell you their problems. That's a GOOD thing. So cheer up dude.
 

Phoenix09215

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Dec 24, 2008
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Well I really don't get this. How can you feel alone if you have people who come to you for advice or for someone someone to talk to? Maby your just helping the wrong people? If the people really cared for your opinion then they would care about you.

And can you blame the girl for walking off? She comes to talk to you and you respond by bursting in to tears! I know that if I was in her shoes I probably would've done something similar...
 

Mozared

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Mar 26, 2009
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2yeNzL7rTU

Really, that does a better job of wording it than I will. Please give it a chance, I'll promise you it'll be worth more than me typing up a wall of text here.
 

Knusper

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Sep 10, 2010
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Don't be so upset! To follow Louis' (the guy from L4D) optimism, something is really just around the corner, just look for it. I tried it and it worked, sort of. Speak to your paerents or something if you're seriously down.

Edit: That last point, can't stress it enough.
 

Crossketch

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Jun 25, 2010
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I don't think you should drug yourself up like some people here said i used to feel the same way but now whenever I feel down like that I watch something that makes me laugh. Laughter truly is the best medicine. I may not have helped but if you need somebody to talk to I'm weird but I'm here for ya.

- [email protected]
 

yizas

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Nov 19, 2009
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When i was going to quit my job (wich i didnt) a friend told me that quitting a job is like commiting suicide. You dont talk about it, just do it, and if you do so well make it something cool like riding a nuclear bomb all the way down to hell Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehaw !


Cowboys from hell ************ !