impossible game moments
- Thread starter Knight Templar
- Start date
F-Zero GX.
Bad guys want to take over the galaxy/universe, and you must stop them....by beating them in a race. Also, there are "Light" and "Darkness" racing championship belts, and when they combine, whoever holds them controls some...universal forces.... or something.
Also, Captain Falcon insists on racing Black Shadow (OMG CREATIVE NAME), instead of simply Falcon Punching him into oblivion, because fighting is "the coward's way" even though Falcon is a friggin' bounty hunter.
The nearly identical endings of every Megaman game for the NES up until Megaman 6 are worthy of mention as well.
Bad guys want to take over the galaxy/universe, and you must stop them....by beating them in a race. Also, there are "Light" and "Darkness" racing championship belts, and when they combine, whoever holds them controls some...universal forces.... or something.
Also, Captain Falcon insists on racing Black Shadow (OMG CREATIVE NAME), instead of simply Falcon Punching him into oblivion, because fighting is "the coward's way" even though Falcon is a friggin' bounty hunter.
The nearly identical endings of every Megaman game for the NES up until Megaman 6 are worthy of mention as well.
Have you read the HALO books? Because the Spartans are incredibly super-duper human with augmented everything (they don't break bones, they break internal organs on their nigh-indestructible skeletal frame) and have that superspecialawesome suit, they can jump out of a plane, overpressure the padding gel in their armor, and they have a good chance of actually surviving a fall from low-orbit. You really should read the HALO books (except the fourth one, it sucked) and it becomes almost plausible that MC survived.Pittzi said:
You've read Yahtzee's Fullyrambolicomatic page on why it would be kick arse to be Mario, didn't you?eggdog14 said:
Perversely, that snippet has been declared non-canon (purely humorous), as opposed to the additional legendary footage cuts in Halos 2 and 3, which are canon. Johnson was retconned to have been already off the ring (if memory serves, commandeering something Covie). Funny you make the crack about gel layers, since Johnson himself is implied by some of the IRIS ARG material to be a holdover from the SPARTAN I program (ORION).tiredinnuendo said:
And in response to LordOmnit, most cars have a center of gravity significantly enough higher than the wheels to make rolling them upright from past about 70 degrees nigh impossible for someone of anywhere near average fitness. (A Land-Rover Series II is on the border between one and two people, with its aluminum upper body. Don't ask how I know this.) I wasn't talking about cars, though, but MC's ability to flip a TANK. And yes, the flipping can constitute the vehicle leaving the GROUND. That strength in itself is an "impossible moment", but does go far in explaining how rifle butts kill so easily in multiplayer. Another impossible moment as it were in Halo 2 was eliminated in 3: the ability of Brutes and combat form Flood to resist great amounts of pistol-whipping in proportion to damage that would be caused that way in multiplayer. The Brutes are also no longer mere "bullet sponges"
Mama, I didn't mean to become this much of a Halo nerd! I'm sorry! D:
In many rpg systems, if you play a mage, you can also become a better mage by bashing creatures with your staff. Hell, in D&D like systems, you can become a better lockpicker by killing monsters (assigning skill points)
In wow, you can't be top class in your profession before being a top class adventurer too. You can melt good iron before you have bashed dozens of creatures to their death.
In wow, you can't be top class in your profession before being a top class adventurer too. You can melt good iron before you have bashed dozens of creatures to their death.
Hogwash. They can write whatever they want, but it doesn't change the fact that you can fall to your death in the game.Pwnage_Incarnate said:
- J
That's why they removed fall damage in Halo 2 and 3, except for the thousand foot precipice from-which-man-cannot-return kind. The marine in Halo 2 singleplayer helping you upgrade your suit is careful to mention this as an upgrade to the aforementioned gel-layer handwave. Also, one must consider that if the suit makes it possible to survive a fall at terminal velocity, any additional altitude beyond that necessary for that is just fluff, it's not going to make him hit the ground any harder.tiredinnuendo said:
One reality breaker in the Halo games: almost never any living quarters or restrooms. Changed in Halo 3 for the human base, but still... We hardly know anything about the Covie homelife; High Charity was crawling with soldiers and featured no obvious living quarters (prophets' living quarters? just another hallway), grunt feeding nipples, or anything!
How about the last stand perk in Call of Duty 4. Before anyone argues against me I know you could possibly survive a gunshot wound for a small time. What Im talking about is when you either put a full clip into a person or hit them with the 50cal. No person could survive more than a few rounds from any firearm witout the aid of a flack jacket.
Is that the bloke who also did a video walkthrough for Shadow of Colossus? Love him and his estranged comments about Coke-Cola when fighting sea serpents.hickwarrior said:
I loved the drone nightclub in Jet Force Gemini!
Anyway, as for my contribution:
Freelancer is a big one which springs to mind. So, you take up arms against an alien race which has existed for thousands upon thousands of years, and possesses technology which hugely out-powers your own, but you can penetrate their home world with a fleet of 50 ships? Please, it was an epic battle, but somewhat overstated.
hi i'm back.
so the falling form space thing in halo 3 is explaned by impact gel. well thats that then.
wait a seccond! wheres that bloody gel when i'm geting killed in one hit by a hunter?
why in RPG's does nobody care that you mass genoside just about everything in your way. who cares if you kill MOSTLY robbers, if i meet sombody who had killed a few million people i am not going to run over hug them.
but on RPG's if you play the theif arn't you the kind of person your suppost to kill?
"i will kill you you bad theif"
"what? you a theif too you know"
"yes but i',m not a NPC so HA"
so the falling form space thing in halo 3 is explaned by impact gel. well thats that then.
wait a seccond! wheres that bloody gel when i'm geting killed in one hit by a hunter?
why in RPG's does nobody care that you mass genoside just about everything in your way. who cares if you kill MOSTLY robbers, if i meet sombody who had killed a few million people i am not going to run over hug them.
but on RPG's if you play the theif arn't you the kind of person your suppost to kill?
"i will kill you you bad theif"
"what? you a theif too you know"
"yes but i',m not a NPC so HA"
Ahh, the deal-breaker moments of videogaming. I can think of a few.
Vampire: The masquerade: Redemption. I can appreciate that an arrow set for flaming is not quite standard issue, what with the need for oily cloth and whatnot. The deal-breaker here was that, in the medieval period, to fire a regular arrow, you needed a bow. To launch a fire arrow... you needed a "flaming bow". I can only presume this had special asbestos grip.
Inventory systems... ok, adventure-gamer's pockets is an old and established tradition going back to the days of Sierra On-line. How about the modern RPG pockets, wherein it's quite acceptable to carry 99 blue gems in a single space... but a red, a blue, and a green gem? That's 3 separate slots!
I recently made the mistake of picking up Darkwatch. Let's see, a secret organization that uses trains with their logo in polished steel on the doors. And, of course, a "morality" system where not only are the choices binary, the prose for the choice is prefaced with "Good:" and "Evil:". Just in case you were unclear on the social ramifications of swallowing souls.
Hit point systems: Ever considered the deeper ramifications of the healing potions? I mean, you could practically mark out on the bottle what the recommended dosage would be for a 12th level warrior with two hits from a frost giant versus a mage bitten in the groin by a goblin.
For that matter, I'm thoroughly sick of games having an XP and level system. I've never in my life seen anybody "level up" and suddenly have a few more hitpoints, and hit harder. It gets quite hilarious when they're VERY close to the threshold and shoot, say, a squirrel. And level up. Because, after all, nothing screams "Hero" like absorbing local wildlife for additional power.
A very common action/rpg trope is the total lack of anything resembling self-preservation in the enemy. The guards that "swarm" you about five at a time. And then another wave. And another. And you've littered a building with a hundred dead... an action that outside of the context of a game, would be the stuff of legends. And you reach the boss's chamber. And even the butler attacks you eagerly. Enthusiastic cries of "Get him!" echo in the chamber. Not once is there an ashen-faced man saying "Please... I have a family. Go on by if you must. Just let me go."
But there's never calm in the face of danger. No acknowledgement of the sheer mass of dead you leave in your wake. The NPC exists in a state of violence, walking around, or, if unarmed, then abject cowardice.
Other fun tropes, the utter inability of most characters to climb a rock that I, an overweight man, could scale freehand. They can jump 18 feet straight up, but if the rock is 19.5 feet tall, it's an implausible obstacle. Or maybe it's a solid fence with gaps you could fire sheep through, but the dexterity involved in going through an opening that's not at floor level is just too much for your mighty warrior.
Or the trivial task quest of most RPGs. Some large NPC who never does anything asks you to run a small errand. Nothing very heroic, just an arbitrary number of body parts from the local wildlife. Or delivering a letter. I especially enjoy that one in an MMO with a fully functional mail system.
Of course, it's also fun in a GTA game to realize that if you commit suicide, the hospital respawn will clear out your wanted level just as well as getting busted, but also leaves you closer to where you want to go.
Ever have a cutscene stop an attacking foe?
How about in Hitman where running triggered suspicion... but walking calmly for the exit while the guards rush to the boss's room to find your handiwork... that's fine?
One of my favorite issues with Half-life was that the pistol did twice the damage of the assault rifle, with the same ammunition. Or how you could find the spots where AI wouldn't trigger, but you could see an elbow... and shoot someone to death without them ever approaching to see what was killing them.
Of course, most hit point systems don't have anybody ever get weaker when they're near death. I mean, personally, if you broke both my arms and beat me with a sock of nickels for 15 minutes... I really doubt I could wield a shotgun accurately enough to hit a gazebo. Let alone jump over a barricade, headshot my pursuers, and crawl for a medkit. Last game I played to bother with any feature of the sort was Cthulhu. Which would have been a pretty decent game, but you could only move at a pretty slow speed, and the quality of your ending was inspired by Samus Aran. A horror game that expected the player to RACE through.
Scarface, simple problem. The terrain was a bit harsher than your average GTA. Normally, there's a mix of things. Stuff that the game ignores, like shrubs. Stuff that is a collision but not an important one, like a stopsign. And stuff that's an absolute barrier like a building or tree, and any collision will cause your car to bounce or flip or something. In scarface, nearly everything was in the 3rd category, and you could, mid race, ram a mailbox and be stopped cold.
I'm sure if I spend another hour or so I'll come up with some more good examples. But I've blown enough of my life this way for one evening. Someone else's turn!
Vampire: The masquerade: Redemption. I can appreciate that an arrow set for flaming is not quite standard issue, what with the need for oily cloth and whatnot. The deal-breaker here was that, in the medieval period, to fire a regular arrow, you needed a bow. To launch a fire arrow... you needed a "flaming bow". I can only presume this had special asbestos grip.
Inventory systems... ok, adventure-gamer's pockets is an old and established tradition going back to the days of Sierra On-line. How about the modern RPG pockets, wherein it's quite acceptable to carry 99 blue gems in a single space... but a red, a blue, and a green gem? That's 3 separate slots!
I recently made the mistake of picking up Darkwatch. Let's see, a secret organization that uses trains with their logo in polished steel on the doors. And, of course, a "morality" system where not only are the choices binary, the prose for the choice is prefaced with "Good:" and "Evil:". Just in case you were unclear on the social ramifications of swallowing souls.
Hit point systems: Ever considered the deeper ramifications of the healing potions? I mean, you could practically mark out on the bottle what the recommended dosage would be for a 12th level warrior with two hits from a frost giant versus a mage bitten in the groin by a goblin.
For that matter, I'm thoroughly sick of games having an XP and level system. I've never in my life seen anybody "level up" and suddenly have a few more hitpoints, and hit harder. It gets quite hilarious when they're VERY close to the threshold and shoot, say, a squirrel. And level up. Because, after all, nothing screams "Hero" like absorbing local wildlife for additional power.
A very common action/rpg trope is the total lack of anything resembling self-preservation in the enemy. The guards that "swarm" you about five at a time. And then another wave. And another. And you've littered a building with a hundred dead... an action that outside of the context of a game, would be the stuff of legends. And you reach the boss's chamber. And even the butler attacks you eagerly. Enthusiastic cries of "Get him!" echo in the chamber. Not once is there an ashen-faced man saying "Please... I have a family. Go on by if you must. Just let me go."
But there's never calm in the face of danger. No acknowledgement of the sheer mass of dead you leave in your wake. The NPC exists in a state of violence, walking around, or, if unarmed, then abject cowardice.
Other fun tropes, the utter inability of most characters to climb a rock that I, an overweight man, could scale freehand. They can jump 18 feet straight up, but if the rock is 19.5 feet tall, it's an implausible obstacle. Or maybe it's a solid fence with gaps you could fire sheep through, but the dexterity involved in going through an opening that's not at floor level is just too much for your mighty warrior.
Or the trivial task quest of most RPGs. Some large NPC who never does anything asks you to run a small errand. Nothing very heroic, just an arbitrary number of body parts from the local wildlife. Or delivering a letter. I especially enjoy that one in an MMO with a fully functional mail system.
Of course, it's also fun in a GTA game to realize that if you commit suicide, the hospital respawn will clear out your wanted level just as well as getting busted, but also leaves you closer to where you want to go.
Ever have a cutscene stop an attacking foe?
How about in Hitman where running triggered suspicion... but walking calmly for the exit while the guards rush to the boss's room to find your handiwork... that's fine?
One of my favorite issues with Half-life was that the pistol did twice the damage of the assault rifle, with the same ammunition. Or how you could find the spots where AI wouldn't trigger, but you could see an elbow... and shoot someone to death without them ever approaching to see what was killing them.
Of course, most hit point systems don't have anybody ever get weaker when they're near death. I mean, personally, if you broke both my arms and beat me with a sock of nickels for 15 minutes... I really doubt I could wield a shotgun accurately enough to hit a gazebo. Let alone jump over a barricade, headshot my pursuers, and crawl for a medkit. Last game I played to bother with any feature of the sort was Cthulhu. Which would have been a pretty decent game, but you could only move at a pretty slow speed, and the quality of your ending was inspired by Samus Aran. A horror game that expected the player to RACE through.
Scarface, simple problem. The terrain was a bit harsher than your average GTA. Normally, there's a mix of things. Stuff that the game ignores, like shrubs. Stuff that is a collision but not an important one, like a stopsign. And stuff that's an absolute barrier like a building or tree, and any collision will cause your car to bounce or flip or something. In scarface, nearly everything was in the 3rd category, and you could, mid race, ram a mailbox and be stopped cold.
I'm sure if I spend another hour or so I'll come up with some more good examples. But I've blown enough of my life this way for one evening. Someone else's turn!
The super-nazi-gasmask-LMG42 soldier of Medal of Honor: Airborne. That was just ridiculously out of place.
Any game where you pick up stuff by running over it.
The last time I looked, running headfirst into a crate just gave me a bruise,
not 15 shotgun ammo.
(Even worse are flying games that do this. Game makers, next time you're in an air-
plane, try crashing into a box that a buddy pushed out of a cargo plane.
I'll bet you wont get a lightning powerup!)
The last time I looked, running headfirst into a crate just gave me a bruise,
not 15 shotgun ammo.
(Even worse are flying games that do this. Game makers, next time you're in an air-
plane, try crashing into a box that a buddy pushed out of a cargo plane.
I'll bet you wont get a lightning powerup!)
If we're going to be extremely picky here, almost all games are impossible. Wasn't that the whole point to begin with? An escape from reality to make your day to day life more fun? To let you experience scenarios your real life would never offer?
True, some games take it rather far and even though people will defend those points with explanations that are only valid in the universe of that particular game, it's all pointless anyway.
Halo's gel-layer system is described in the books. In Halo 3, the escape pod the Master Chief was in is right next to him, meaning he was launched out of it on impact. He didn't take the full blow. In the second book, if I remember correctly, a group of Spartans jump out of a crashing Pelican without any kind of pod and several of them die, many of them are injured. Said gel-layer doesn't help you when fighting a hunter because overpressurizing it means you can no longer move, like a little child who is forced to wear far too many and too thick clothes to keep out the winter cold. You're just preparing to absord an impact.
Call me a Halo nerd, I don't care. All games are bound to have some sort of explanation for stupid shit they put in their gameplay, and there will always be people who love and people who hate it and complain about it.
True, some games take it rather far and even though people will defend those points with explanations that are only valid in the universe of that particular game, it's all pointless anyway.
Halo's gel-layer system is described in the books. In Halo 3, the escape pod the Master Chief was in is right next to him, meaning he was launched out of it on impact. He didn't take the full blow. In the second book, if I remember correctly, a group of Spartans jump out of a crashing Pelican without any kind of pod and several of them die, many of them are injured. Said gel-layer doesn't help you when fighting a hunter because overpressurizing it means you can no longer move, like a little child who is forced to wear far too many and too thick clothes to keep out the winter cold. You're just preparing to absord an impact.
Call me a Halo nerd, I don't care. All games are bound to have some sort of explanation for stupid shit they put in their gameplay, and there will always be people who love and people who hate it and complain about it.
Many, many things from Tekken 5, but I'll cite the most horrible one:
Julia's "story" is that she wants the "reforestation data" (or whatever it was called). As lame as that is, the boss Jinpachi actually carries the cd with him! After you kill him and he turns to dust that's the only thing he was carrying...
It can hardly get any more unreal and lame...
Julia's "story" is that she wants the "reforestation data" (or whatever it was called). As lame as that is, the boss Jinpachi actually carries the cd with him! After you kill him and he turns to dust that's the only thing he was carrying...
It can hardly get any more unreal and lame...