Inappropriate bowel movements

[Barbas]

Let's discuss those for a bit.

I crapped my pants once in the Museum of American War Crimes. It wasn't funny at the time, but now I look back on it as one of those strange almost-achievements due to its sheer peculiarity. Please share your own stories of unfortunate undergarment disasters, near misses and pub[l]ic disturbances. Where were you, what happened, and how has it changed your life?

 

[Casual Shinji]

Boy, things are getting quite dirty over here. Masterbation, dickpics, and now fecal matter....... ;D

OT: I once peed myself on a school trip when I was like in the third or fourth grade. Kids saw, older kids saw, and one chuckle fuck two classes up kept reminding me of it for the rest of his time in school.

Never pooped myself thankfully.

 

[EHKOS]

I was at an arcade with my parents. It had no bathroom. I was like...eight. So I keep telling them I had to pee, and eventually, I just got into one of those racer seats (except it was longer, and more concave, almost like a toilet bowl now that I think back on it) and just pissed my pants. They were SOAKED. So we left about two minutes later (great timing guise) and we go to this Mcdolans on the way home, and my dad was like "OK, we can go in and you can pee now." I just replied "I don't have to go anymore." Because really, what are you, as an eight year old, going to say? I'll never forget the look of surprise, shock, and terror in my mom's face as she looked back at me.

Went home, took a shower, and to this day I feel bad for the staff member getting paid shit wages who had to clean up that enormous piss puddle. And yet, sometimes I also laugh, and then feel worse after laughing. But man, those shorts...top to bottom, they were soaked through, I can remember them getting cold on the way home. Throw 'em at a wall, they'd...WAIT A MINUTE YOU'RE JUST GATHERING FAP MATERIAL STORIES AREN'T YOU!?


Also one time I just woke up, 20 year old guy, turned over to get up, turns out I literally shit the bed. No stomach ache, nothing strange the night before, but since I'm a heavy moving sleeper, it got all over my shorts (yes I sleep in my clothes). So for no reason, I just pooped my pants. Pooped 'em.

 

[Scarim Coral]

While I have many bowel movements in my live time but I always made it to the toliet in time except for one...

Back in high school during last lesson (English) before home time, I needed to take a dump (wasn't anything bad, I guess my digestive were fast or strong that day). Back then I cared about having 100% attention on my record (if I had asked my teacher to go to the toliet, she would had mark it down on my homework book) and going to the toliet during lesson affected it so I figure I can hold it in. On boy was I wrong.

I pretty much ran like there was no tomorrow when it was home time (toliet ain't open after school). I tried my best to hold it in but sadly I fail when I reach the halfway point. On the plus note, back then I was wearing those closed underpant type (oh god imagine if I had started wearing boxer a couple of years earlier??!!). I ran to fast that I had to knock on the door and my parent were suprised that I was home alot ealier than I would had arrived.

Needless to say I drop my load that were on my pant into the toliet, clean my ass and put the now soil underpant in the bin. Heh I kinda suprised how none of my parent notice the content in the bin, surely it would had smell bad?

Before you mention about getting a teacher to open the toliet door or knocking on some stranger door to used their toliet, I'm the shy type...

Also one time I just woke up, 20 year old guy, turned over to get up, turns out I literally shit the bed. No stomach ache, nothing strange the night before, but since I'm a heavy moving sleeper, it got all over my shorts (yes I sleep in my clothes). So for no reason, I just pooped my pants. Pooped 'em.

Actually you reminded me another time when I was a kid althought I had diarrhea. I can't remember why but I didn't tell my mum about it until it was bed time.

 

[BadNewDingus]

I've sharted myself playing video games. I didn't know until I got up ... it was kinda of a dark time for me.

I just felt bad for one of my friends that sat in the seat a day later. I did clean it up, but still.

 

[The Almighty Aardvark]

Note, this isn't a story about someone exactly shitting their pants, but it's related enough that I'm going to share it here.

So me and a group of my friends were going to Otafest, an anime convention where I live, for a weekend. We were going with a group of people who went regularly, and they would typically invite everyone in the group to just sleep over at their parents house for the weekend.

We went to the convention on the Friday, and came back to her place later in the evening. There wasn't anything all that notable save for a guy, let's call him Steve, got angry and had a bit of a mental breakdown (Which in retrospect, was because the rest of us were acting like assholes and excluding him), though he felt better as the night went on. The guys and the girls were split up, with the guys sleeping downstairs and the girls sleeping upstairs. Several of the guys were asleep downstairs already, but me and another guy were upstairs joking around with the girls until about 3am.

At some point during the night, things escalated and we had a pumpkin pie fight. We were covered in it, the couch was covered in it, and it wasn't until after we ran out of pie that we realized that we needed to clean this up. We got a bunch of towels and did our best to clean off all of the pumpkin pie, then me and the other guy went back downstairs to sleep.

Come the morning, for whatever reason her mother seems really pissed off. She informs us that we're not allowed to stay over on Saturday night. We didn't really understand what had her so angry, maybe she thought that we were doing something sexual upstairs, maybe she was angry that we were up so late, we didn't have a clue. So we went to the convention, went our separate ways after, then met up again in the morning. The rest of the convention goes without any real hitch.

It isn't until after the convention that we find out what her mother was so pissed off about. She got up before all of us and saw all of her white towels just covered in brown. She was convinced that Steve was so angry that he got up in the middle of the night, and took a shit on all over her towels. She didn't even try to clean them (at which point she'd probably have noticed the smell), she just threw them all away.

How she came to this conclusion, is beyond me, but it made for a pretty amusing story.

 

[Catfood220]

So, I was at a music festival about 10 year and over the course of a 3 day festival I ingest copious amounts of booze as well as some speed and magic mushrooms with added poor hygiene for good measure. On the Sunday, I woke up with the feeling that someone has been kicking me in the kidneys. A trip to the toilet doesn't get rid of the feeling so I think its just me over doing it.

So I'm watching the final band of the weekend, Greenday, when all of a sudden guts drop, I desperately need a toilet. But I am not missing Greenday so I hold it, because I was drunk and stupid. To my credit, I made it to the end of the set. Then I wander to the toilet where there is a massive queue and my shit decides that it has waited long enough. There was nothing I could do to stop it, all I could do is keep a straight face as I shit my pants and hope that no one has noticed.

I finally get into the toilet stall where the worst of it is contained in my underwear which I manage to tear off and dispose of. But of course there is no toilet paper so all I can do is pull up my jeans and walk back to the campsite with a squelchy arse before I can get some toilet paper and go and clean myself up.

I wish I could tell you this was the last festival I shit myself at. But these days, I pay attention to what my body is saying. I take toilet paper with me at times as well as Imodium to help bung me up again as well as trying to keep my hygiene standards high. And thankfully, there have been no accidents in the last 5 years. I'm not saying it hasn't been close couple of times though.

 

[FPLOON]

I used to pee myself in the most unconventional of situations... While standing to the Pledge of Allegiance in Kindergarten... While walking out of a bathroom... Even in the passenger seat of my mom's car less than 5 years ago... The one I remember the most was in first grade...

It was my first time on stage as my class was presenting the acapella version of Brown Bear Brown Bear... Beforehand, each of us were given a copy of one of the animals from the original book to color in ourselves, which doubled as our only "prop" to represent the corresponding animal when it came up during the acapella... I had the fish (I think) and, just like everyone else , I had to stand up, "sing" my piece from the book with everyone else who had the same piece, and sit down... Well, I had to go to the bathroom right when my class was coming to the stage and I tried to hold it until the was all over... Once I got up to "sing" my piece, I started peeing my pants and I did not stop peeing until I sat back down... I think my mom knew, afterwards, why for the rest of the acapella I did not want to look at the audience...

Other than that, after hearing this <url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ju0Z6NquldM>Castlevania III rap, I cannot unsee the "reason" for Trevor Belmont's walk animation...

 

[stormtrooper9091]

Unfortunately, I can name several different occasions and I really can't single out the one most embarrassing. So I'll be posting in detail a bit later

 

[Bob_McMillan]

Took a poop while I was dribbling a ball in football practice. Then I had to ride home beside two dudes from my team and their mom.

When someone asked what that smell was, I suggested that it was dog shit. We all started looking at our shoes. Thank God they just dropped it eventually.

 

[BoogieManFL]

When I was in 2nd or 3rd grade I went to take a pee at the urinal right before recess. Apparently my shirt slipped down without me noticing while I was talking to my buddy who was in the urinal next to me and deflected all my piss down on my pants, soaking them.

I think I spent recess on my hands and knees walking through the grass acting like I was looking for my dropped lunch money, with my buddy helping. Afterwards he walked right in front of me back to class to block visibility and I stuck very closely to my desk. It hadn't dried much by lunch so I "accidentally" spilled milk on myself by opening it too fast and ripping it (cardboard cartons) and it pretty convincingly covered my lower shirt and upper pants. I don't think anyone noticed or else they probably would have made fun of me.

Ever since I've always make sure Mr Happy is free and clear.

 

[Aerosteam]

At the airport. I was with my family, we got off the plane thank fuck. I blame either the aeroplane food or a restaurant the previous day, but I had a really sore stomach, all the way till we got back home - the entire time I thought I probably shit myself. I was wearing white shorts that day, but it was only when I changed my clothes I noticed a brown spot. So I shit my pants like what I suspected, and multiple people probably saw the brown stain on my asshole in public. I didn't feel it, so it must've been pretty liquid-y, combined with all the walking that day I'm surprise my shoes weren't filled.

I binned the underwear I had and never wore those shorts again.

 

[Creator002]

Never shat myself, had a near miss once when I didn't realise I had to go until I was passing the toilet, then it just came.
I pissed myself in my sleep recently (month or two) somehow. I don't remember the dream (if any), but I just woke up and thought "hmm, my pants seem wet."

 

[PainInTheAssInternet]

I had a near miss. I was with my girlfriend at her house which is only about 3 km from mine when I realized I had to go. I have a thing about using anyone's bathroom but my own particularly when it concerns crap. Since it's late anyways, I decide it's time for me to go. Halfway home, I feel like my bowels are being filled with equal parts solids and air. I have to fart really bad, but I don't trust it for obvious reasons. It gets so bad that I have to stand absolutely still on the sidewalk in the middle of a park in the dark for a few minutes while the urge passes. Finally it does and I continue on my journey.

When I got home, I got my reprieve in the bathroom. I farted for two seconds and absolutely filled the bowl with solids.

 

[Batou667]

Come the morning, for whatever reason her mother seems really pissed off.

Well, to be fair, having a food fight in a strangers house was quite a dickish move in itself.

 

[The Almighty Aardvark]

Well, to be fair, having a food fight in a strangers house was quite a dickish move in itself.

To be more fair, we'd been friends for a while before that, and her mom wasn't the sort of person who'd care about that as long as she didn't have to clean it up.

 

[MetalDooley]

Going back a few years I was coming home from a night out with my friends.About half way home I got a sudden cramp in my bowels and knew I wasn't going to make it so I jumped the ditch into a nearby field.Unfortunately my reactions were dulled due to my alcohol intake and I couldn't get my pants down in time so ended up crapping myself quite substantially.Luckily it was late and I live in a fairly quiet area so I was able to walk home without meeting anyone.

I made it home,went straight into the garage,stripped off all my clothes,cleaned off the worst and stuck all my clothes in the washing machine.And then I discovered I had forgotten to bring a key so now I'm naked,reeking of shite and locked out of my house at 2am.Eventually I had to wake up my father.He unlocked the door to find me standing there balls naked with my lower half covered in feces and just shook his head and said "I'm not going to ask" and went back to bed

 

[Barbas]

(Snip).

Possibly the best parenting you could ask for.

 

[Tiger King]

I was at a house party many years ago, it was at this pretty rich girls house and it got spectacularly out of hand. All these random people turned up and the place got pretty trashed.
The living room I recall, had this pristine white carpet that probably needed replacing after red wine, food and soil from a knocked over plant pot stained it. The girl who's house it was, was in a hell of a state, running from room to room, begging people to 'put that down!' Or 'stop doing that' and 'get off the furniture!'.
So it was pretty chaotic and all rather fun unless you were a certain rich girl who's parents were going to kill her when they got back from holiday/vacation.

Anyhow, most people were in the living room partying it up to music from the early 2000's, drinking, laughing etc and there's this one guy passed out on the couch, sat bolt upright with a beer can in hand but completely out of it. As he was unconscious the guy was left alone and largely ignored. so a lot of heads turned when the guy drunkenly rose from the couch and we all watched in horror and then amusement as this guy did a 180, dropped his jeans to the floor and urinated on the sofa. Once finished, the guy pulled up his trousers, turned around, and plonked himself back down in his now pissy seat on the sofa where he resumed his comatose state.
I can't imagine what it must have been like to be that guy at school on Monday, or when he had to do the walk of shame home in pissy pants.

Never had an accident myself but I did come scarily close last summer. I had gone for a run on the beach and I suddenly got this feeling in my stomach like someone had drilled a hole in my guts and everything was about to fall through. I ran home as fast as I could with my arse cheeks clenched as tight as a vice and just made it home intime before a rather embarrassing thing happened.

I would be so embarrassed if I ever did have an accident like some of the stories here!