Insult Swordfighting!

[General Mostly Electrified Steel]

Yes! The ultimate game, thankee.

And thankee, Al, for the idea.

It works like this. You have unlimited non-fatal powers, and superb skill with a blade. So you can kick ass. However! Your gods will look down on you if you can't engage in witty repartee while doing so, instantly rendering you as weak as a kitten.

I'll start.

I put on my robe and wizard hat, and coat my broadsword in sorcerous flames.

"Ha! You fight like a dairy farmer!"

Engarde.

 

[General Mostly Electrified Steel]

EDIT

Al beat me.

I summon a tangible forcefield around my torso, and bow to Al.

 

[Copter400]

*In a flurry of duel-wielding scimitars, Copter400 cuts Darth Mobius something fierce.*

And yo' mum knows all about ridin', doesn't she Mobius?

 

[Copter400]

*With half a rapier sticking out of his shoulder, Copter makes a pretty thin rebuttal.*

My boyfriend? Oh, you mean YO' MOMMA'!

 

[General Mostly Electrified Steel]

Fighting a war on two fronts, Gems calls on the powers of Jergal to infuse his blade with energy, before unleashing a whirling defence, throwing both Swift and Al backwards.

"Time to feed you some more humble pie, beggar!"

 

[Copter400]

*Seeing GMES in a moment of weakness, Copter stumbles to his feet and makes a desperate backstab in his general direction.*

Take your humble pie and stick it where the sun don't shine!

 

[Copter400]

*Having regained his strength, Copter makes a quick jab at Al*

He-man or she-man, Joeline?

 

[Copter400]

*Copter uses Al's headbutt as an opportunity to beat him repeatedly on the helmet with the pommel of his other scimitar*

So you admit the manicures, you disgrace to masculinity?!

 

[Copter400]

*Swift's blow catches him off guard, but Copter fends off the sudden attack*

Then what does that make you, you inexcusable whore of a bastard-child?

 

[end_boss]

How fitting. You fight like a cow.

 

[Copter400]

*Copter stabs Swift about halfway through his lengthy insult before waltzing off to treat his wounds and play Oblivion*

Too long, you fool!

 

[PurpleRain]

I watch through the cracks of my hands as the ban hammer comes ragging down upon this thread.

 

[Rolling Thunder]

*Leaps into the fray brandishing a claymore*

Hey Joe, is it just me or are you overly eager for your enemies to,ah, 'submit' to you?

*Carves up Almightyjoe like a roast joint.*

 

[Easykill]

I believe flamer is a type of "gay" insult. Makes Fantastic Four kinda weird though....

EDIT: Huzzah! I am ze Infamous Scribbler!

 

[Kogarian]

I believe it was both of your mothers, states a bystander.

 

[InProgress]

*Swiftly jumps in from a window, stubbing his toe on a bookshelf that falls over and hits all for +5 damage

Read that you wannabe fighters born form imbred dogs!

 

[General Mostly Electrified Steel]

I swiftly dodge out of the way of InProgress's atomic stumble, and help him up, before delivering a surge of energy into his shoulder.

"I can only hope that your physical dexterity speaks nothing of your mental adroightness."

 

[LegsyWegsy]

*jumps in and strikes all*

Bloody hell, you can't use viagra cause you probably need three mates behind you before you get hard if you fight like that!

 

[General Mostly Electrified Steel]

I absorb the blow, moving with it to issue a momentuous side-swipe.

"And with a name like that, I bet you need nine!"

 

[LegsyWegsy]

*strikes and simply says*

ORLY?