Irn Bru!

[OneCatch]

Damn it Daystar! I thought the reason I always invade Scotland first in Medieval II was a well kept secret! But now you have seen my motives and shared them with the world...

I'm playing as the Scots right now, and my armies of rabble and peasants and highlanders are rubbish on paper, but they've been scoring glorious victories against the English, the Welsh, the Danes, the Spanish; pretty much everyone!

Now I know why...

 

[him over there]

I keep reading the title as I'm bru by mistake, which makes me think of a horrible asian stereotype singing that europop song about a house or whatever. anyway all soft drinks are pretty subpar. The mighty daystar has run out of cuisine to hold over us filthy peasants it seems.

Edit: I need to reconcile with the gods for saying soft drinks are sub par. This one is okay, and only this one:

 

[White-Death]

Hmm...Just finished my can, and I had an X-Ray as I am studying the long-term effect of Irn Bru.
It appears my skin is now 25% Irn, which is a unique new indestructible metal, only found in Irn Bru.
Now I know why the Scots own in Medieval II!
Capthca:Fools gold.
O RLY?

 

[OneCatch]

Dogs can be trusted. Sheep slightly less so as they are not malicious, but tend to have a hidden agenda. Cows are simply untrustworthy. To their credit, though, they're nowhere near the levels of pure evil caged in the flesh-bags we call horses. Fuck horses.

*Nods sagely*
Also, mountain ponies. Fuck those guys. They just don't understand the concept of gratefulness or fair play.*

I got beaten up by a pony once.
Halfway up a mountain.
In the rain.
After I fed it.
When I was 7. (Truestory)

- - - - -

*and don't get me started on goats.

 

[White-Death]

Dogs can be trusted. Sheep slightly less so as they are not malicious, but tend to have a hidden agenda. Cows are simply untrustworthy. To their credit, though, they're nowhere near the levels of pure evil caged in the flesh-bags we call horses. Fuck horses.

*Nods sagely*
Also, mountain ponies. Fuck those guys. They just don't understand the concept of gratefulness or fair play.*

I got beaten up by a pony once.
Halfway up a mountain.
In the rain.
After I fed it.
When I was 7. (Truestory)

- - - - -

*and don't get me started on goats.

You dear sir, Must consult the great overlord of Blerg to cure your pony Predicaments...
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/pony

 

[Thespian]

Dear god. Irn Bru is the most amazing thing ever. Nothing tops Irn Bru. I fucking love it. It's all I drink. It's actually hard enough to find in Ireland. But it's amazing. So damn good. Oh god. God yes.

 

[OneCatch]

Spoiler: Tale of my terrifying encounter with a mountain pony

Dogs can be trusted. Sheep slightly less so as they are not malicious, but tend to have a hidden agenda. Cows are simply untrustworthy. To their credit, though, they're nowhere near the levels of pure evil caged in the flesh-bags we call horses. Fuck horses.

*Nods sagely*
Also, mountain ponies. Fuck those guys. They just don't understand the concept of gratefulness or fair play.*

I got beaten up by a pony once.
Halfway up a mountain.
In the rain.
After I fed it.
When I was 7. (Truestory)

- - - - -

*and don't get me started on goats.

You dear sir, Must consult the great overlord of Blerg to cure your pony Predicaments...
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/pony

But I did everything like it said!

From this, I suspect that perhaps mountain ponies are the inferior, bitter and thuggish cousins of the ponies spoken of within that tome.
Y'know what? I'm not even going to call them "mountain ponies" any more; 'mountain' sounds too grand. They can be "hill ponies" or "twmp ponies". Bastards.

 

[Daveman]

The delicious taste of rust and sugar.

Frankly, I've had plenty of Scottish delicacies; haggis, deep fried mars bars, the lot. The only one I've come to hate is Irn Bru.

 

[The Night Angel]

I drink Irn Bru only very occasionally, it is quite nice, I'll give you that, but it has to be like 99% sugar. It can rot all your teeth with just one teaspoon full. Ì honestly wonder if it isn't designed to see how little people care what goes in their systems. The great food God should ration this stuff more carefully, or he will lose all his worshippers due to them not having any teeth left to try his culinary delights.

 

[Mafoobula]

My parents, magnificent people that they are, managed to get 2 dozen bottles sent to me in *&^%ing Afghanistan. I still haven't thanked them enough for it.
Everyone who tried it agreed it's a glorious drink, in every way possible. Unique flavor, smooth texture, enough carbonation to tickle the tonsils, without turning into nothing but foam in the mouth and make you belch every 3 seconds.
Oh yeah, and the advertisements are some of the best I've seen. Other companies and businesses will spend zillions on their super special commercials for the Superbowl, Irn Bru is just like that all the time.

Bottom line: Irn *&^%ing Bru is the single best thing that goes into your mouth, and I'm also including air on that list.

 

[Formica Archonis]

can you mail me some? in canada we dont have that supposed nectar of the gods.

Yes we do. Several drinks with the name, actually.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irn-Bru#Canada

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Don't be mad because of the snip !
]

Mr. Clarion, I search your wisdom and inquire information about this Bru. It sounds like it is a beverage casted straight down from the gods, It looks like pure energy from the Sun! Releasing this to the unprepared world surely will cause it to collapse, no ?

Oh how I long to taste this Bru, but I fear it would be to much for my weak mortal body. Surely only the Chosen Ones could stomach the Bru. If only I could, if only I could. How does one expose themselves to the Bru for the first time and be sure it will not kill them ?

Dude, s'all good.

Just drink it.

 

[Kungfu_Teddybear]

Jesus, only Daystar could make a thread about Irn Bru and it would hit 6 pages long. So in the name of my English brother across the border I shall continue the discussion for shits and giggles, also because I'm bored.

So, anyone tried Irn Bru: Fiery?

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Jesus, only Daystar could make a thread about Irn Bru and it would hit 6 pages long. So in the name of my English brother across the border I shall continue the discussion for shits and giggles, also because I'm bored.

So, anyone tried Irn Bru: Fiery?

You make that sound like it's a bad thing...

 

[Char12]

Drink Irn Bru regularly, benefits of living in glasgow!

 

[RustlessPotato]

Don't be mad because of the snip !
]

Mr. Clarion, I search your wisdom and inquire information about this Bru. It sounds like it is a beverage casted straight down from the gods, It looks like pure energy from the Sun! Releasing this to the unprepared world surely will cause it to collapse, no ?

Oh how I long to taste this Bru, but I fear it would be to much for my weak mortal body. Surely only the Chosen Ones could stomach the Bru. If only I could, if only I could. How does one expose themselves to the Bru for the first time and be sure it will not kill them ?

Dude, s'all good.

Just drink it.

Belgium is so insignificant they don't sell it here.

 

[Kungfu_Teddybear]

Jesus, only Daystar could make a thread about Irn Bru and it would hit 6 pages long. So in the name of my English brother across the border I shall continue the discussion for shits and giggles, also because I'm bored.

So, anyone tried Irn Bru: Fiery?

You make that sound like it's a bad thing...

Irn Bru Fiery? It is a bad thing... I hate ginger.

If you meant the thread hitting 6 pages, I just said that because I guarantee if I made this thread it would have hit 2 pages max before people got bored. But then, I'm not as witty as you are :'(

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Jesus, only Daystar could make a thread about Irn Bru and it would hit 6 pages long. So in the name of my English brother across the border I shall continue the discussion for shits and giggles, also because I'm bored.

So, anyone tried Irn Bru: Fiery?

You make that sound like it's a bad thing...

Irn Bru Fiery? It is a bad thing... I hate ginger.

If you meant the thread hitting 6 pages, I just said that because I guarantee if I made this thread it would have hit 2 pages max before people got bored. But then, I'm not as witty as you are :'(

I haven't actually tried Irn Bru Fiery yet, I should probably remedy that.

As for the thread? Well, bribe money sexual favours being awesome makes all the difference.

 

[Kungfu_Teddybear]

Jesus, only Daystar could make a thread about Irn Bru and it would hit 6 pages long. So in the name of my English brother across the border I shall continue the discussion for shits and giggles, also because I'm bored.

So, anyone tried Irn Bru: Fiery?

You make that sound like it's a bad thing...

Irn Bru Fiery? It is a bad thing... I hate ginger.

If you meant the thread hitting 6 pages, I just said that because I guarantee if I made this thread it would have hit 2 pages max before people got bored. But then, I'm not as witty as you are :'(

I haven't actually tried Irn Bru Fiery yet, I should probably remedy that.

As for the thread? Well, bribe money sexual favours being awesome makes all the difference.

[HEADING=1]Nooooooooo![/HEADING] Don't try Irn Bru Fiery! It's horrid!

Well I suppose if you like ginger it would be fine but I think it's just ew.

 

[7moreDead_v1legacy]

Spoiler

Let me ask you a question. A very important question.

When was the last time you drank the sweat of god?

If your answer is anything other than 'I'm drinking it right now' then shut the hell up and feast on my teats of knowledge.

Don't push, there's enough to go around.


When you think of Scotland, what comes to mind first?

Kilts?

Sean Connery?

Haggis?

Unintelligible English?

Those are all good answers, but they are all wrong.

The right answer is Irn Bru

It's okay, I'll give you a minute.

Notice the colour?

Does it look familiar?

Okay, I'll giver you another minute, but no more!

There is a direct and infallible correlation between the consumption of Irn Bru and the colour of a Scot's hair colour.

But this isn't why Irn Bru is the best soft drink in the Omniverse.

Irn Bru is the only soft drink that has caused wars.

Remember Brave Heart

Ignore Gibson, he's not important.

Notice the background?

Has your mind been blown?

The First War of Scottish Independence wasn't fought for independence, no, the Scots wanted to keep the secret formula to themselves, the treacherous bastards.

This wasn't like the American Revolution, oh no, we didn't really give a toss about them.

No, this was a war the English were not willing to back out of.

The Great British Food God demanded that the knowledge of the Bru be shared by all his people so that discord may not be sowed.

"But Daystar, you furtive pygmy you, Why Irn Bru and not Iron Brew?"

That's a good question.

And now for some actual facts (no, really).

Well, back in the day, a drink could only be labeled 'brew' if it was actually brewed. As we all now know, Irn Bru is not brewed, it is sweat from the mighty pits of god himself, so how was this obstacle overcome?

Change the name? No, that would be to admit defeat. Take out a couple of letters, that should fool 'em.

And it did.

To this day, Irn Bru outsells Coca Cola (blasphemous American beverage) in it's home country.

It's so good that cows consider it a personal insult not to be consumed with the beverage.

See?

And cows never lie.

Never.

Ja suis adore le Irnbru...But Often bru threads get so out of hand...I am not sure why it could be the madness that one gets just thinking about its sweet sweet taste or gods know what...

This a IB thread from about 16 months ago on a MTB forum...

Someone broke the chain of goodness so I had to step in an fix it unforunately I had finished my bru and had to improvise...

Also the people that should rule the UK (Barr) have limeade which is possibly the best green liquid man has made...

It's also stupidly cheap!