Is She Interested In Me? Help Needed

[emilybreckejn]

Hello folks!

I have a crush on this girl I like from my condo, but I dont know if she is interested in me or not. I was googling and googling and found resources like:

http://thestallionstyle.com/8-sure-signs-that-a-girl-likes-you/
https://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/signs-a-girl-likes-you.html

They all say that I should look at her pupils, check out her body language or look if she touches her hair a lot. I dont know about this, I doubt these clues are much reliable. Is there anything else I can do? I am really desperate, I cant stop dreaming about her during night and I think that I will have to directly ask her to go on a coffee date with me. I fear rejection a lot, I dont want to be hurt.

Any feedback or clues I should look for? I would love to hear from experienced members!

 

[maninahat]

Hello folks!

I have a crush on this girl I like from my condo, but I dont know if she is interested in me or not. I was googling and googling and found resources like:

http://thestallionstyle.com/8-sure-signs-that-a-girl-likes-you/
https://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/signs-a-girl-likes-you.html

They all say that I should look at her pupils, check out her body language or look if she touches her hair a lot. I dont know about this, I doubt these clues are much reliable. Is there anything else I can do? I am really desperate, I cant stop dreaming about her during night and I think that I will have to directly ask her to go on a coffee date with me. I fear rejection a lot, I dont want to be hurt.

Any feedback or clues I should look for? I would love to hear from experienced members!

You could spend until doomsday trying to accumulate proof that she's into you. This is an excuse to avoid asking the question, much in the same way that my continuous research is an excuse for me to avoid getting on with writing a book. Just start a conversation with her and if you feel it is going well, ask her out for coffee. Accept the rejection if it comes. Yes you're scared of committing to it and yes it will temporarily sting if she says no, but if you like this girl more than you like your own pride, then its worth taking that risk.

 

[dscross]

I think that's solid advice from maninahat. There are some signs that you can look for but you'll just end up torturing yourself. Honestly, it's best for your own bravery and self esteem that you just ask and take the hit if it's a no (it's easy for us to say though. It's a lot harder if you know them well).

That said, men and women are different. As such, they usually send out different signals when they are interested. Women often struggle over male 'signs', they just can't always notice them. They go to the bathroom and ask their girlfriends 'do you think he likes me'? Similarly, I can guarantee that a girl can tell when a member of her sex is interested in a guy. Because she knows the female 'signs' of interest. If you know her friends, why not ask them first?

If you want specifics though, here are things to look out for...

She keeps checking you out
She looks at you longer than necessary
Every time she is feeling an emotional peak (eg laughing), she glances at you
Her physiology changes uncontrollably (biological speaking certain things happen to your body automatically when you are attracted to someone)
She uses sexy body language
She seeks attention
Proximity: She closes in on you
She gives you the time of day
She has energy with you
She isolates herself with you
She warns you off another girl
Her grooming is immaculate
She finds ridiculous excuses to contact you
She keeps extending your time together
She lets you be dominant and assumes the submissive role
She wants to seem similar to you
She touches you
She validates herself as a potential mate
She talks to you differently

This is only a guide, and as I've said, the best thing to do is just ask and hope for the best so you don't regret never knowing for the rest of your life.

 

[Matthew Gruber]

Dear, I think you should follow the guideline of dscross. If you notice all the points in her than you can take a step forward otherwise wait for her.

 

[renegade7]

All of that stuff about body language and subtle signs really only applies to someone whom you already know reasonably well, and doesn't always mean a whole lot.

The only way you're going to potentially get anywhere is by talking to her, I'm sorry to say.

I am really desperate,

The only other advice I can give you is to try not to be desperate. Women can sense desperation and they find it really off-putting. Plus you won't have any fun if you think of this as something that you need rather than something that you want.

On the other hand, if you're "desperate" in the sense that you have no prospects whatsoever, then maybe it's time to think about some self-improvement. Are you in shape? Do you have any hobbies or unique interests?

 

[ethanscott]

Hello folks!

I have a crush on this girl I like from my condo, but I dont know if she is interested in me or not. I was googling and googling and found resources like:

http://thestallionstyle.com/8-sure-signs-that-a-girl-likes-you/
https://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/signs-a-girl-likes-you.html

They all say that I should look at her pupils, check out her body language or look if she touches her hair a lot. I dont know about this, I doubt these clues are much reliable. Is there anything else I can do? I am really desperate, I cant stop dreaming about her during night and I think that I will have to directly ask her to go on a coffee date with me. I fear rejection a lot, I dont want to be hurt.

Any feedback or clues I should look for? I would love to hear from experienced members!

I have a little to say.
When it comes to girls or guys or any human for that matter, it is said that you subconsciously notice a person's feet before you even look at their face to determine the first impression. Of course what you speak will matter but you need to sport a really nice shoe like a Woodland or something that shows that you are gentle without compromising your masculinity. Make sure you wear something nice too so that she gets impressed instantly.
Also you can see if a girl likes you by checking out how she is dressed for you. They will obviously look pretty, but if she likes you she will want you to compliment her on the little things she wears like women's watches, earrings, necklaces, shoes too for that matter. All of these things matter a lot.
When you talk, if you hesitate, it is game over. Women like men who exhibit confidence.
I hope I was of some help.
Cheers mate!

 

[jacjon]

why not go and talk to her and find out? I would be cautious about mentally investing so much into her before even establishing a connection--that is one of the biggest killers of "game" if you want to call it that

 

[Callate]

It isn't really clear from what you say how acquainted you are with this woman. Do you know her name? Have you spoken? Do you say "hi" as you pass each other on the stairwell?

Physical signs aren't necessarily going to help you- in fact, if you spend too much time staring at her trying to discern if she's touching her hair or her pupils are dilating, it's probably going to come off wrong. What you need are more obvious things like, if you strike up a conversation with her, does she linger and extend it, or look for an excuse to retreat?

Doesn't have to be anything romantic or serious.

Have you met that couple that just moved in? They seem nice.
Can't believe how quickly it's gotten dark. Winter seems to sneak up on me.
Is that your car? How has it been treating you? I've heard good things about [x].

If things seem to go well, say farewell, then next time you interact with her (preferably days later) maybe ask her if she would like to have coffee with you some time. That will give her some time to think about the impression you made, and keep you from looking desperate.