I've Had Enough!

[obliterate]

Bravo, man! Just remember, "never confuse kindness with weakness." I'm a nice guy as well, but people know not to try and walk all over me.

Anywho, this is your life, not theirs. They had their chance to live the life they wanted, and they're not allowed to try and redo it through yours, or to make you their little puppet when you're a full-grown adult. You've stood up, now never let them knock you down.

Well I am a nice guy too but there are a few people who can annoy me and when they do I turn the page...I don't wanna be seen as the weakling and I don't need anyone's pity...I am who I am and everyone will have to live with that

 

[Numb1lp]

To hell with your parents, you sound like a nice guy.

 

[DigitalSushi]

True. Factor in senility, and cultural stuff that screws with people all the time, and you could pretty much make him a semi-sympathetic character.

And to be perfectly honest, despite all the crap he gives me, he's still my dad. I'm named after him, I take a lot of my love of music from him, I learned how to enjoy camping and fishing from him.

It's just that for a lot of my life, things he's done have directly or indirectly made my life hell. I know it seems petty, but honestly? I don't care about being petty. I've tried being nice and considerate, and I got walked all over.

How old is your father?, he teached* you fishing and other stuff that he liked? and he was fine? probably because he was the rule maker in that when you was the rookie. Its why I love teaching my nephews Martial Arts, i'm stronger than they are, but when they grow up they will be stronger than me.

My uncles instilled respect into me, in that I was stronger than they are, but I should still respect them for the things they have teached* me made me stronger, without their impartial knowledge I would not be like this now.... You may surpass your teacher, but always respect him or her.

Your dad doesn't get that, you've surpassed him, but he wants respect and constant re assurance of it.

the reason he would be a semi sympathetic character is that he's the blue collar hard labourer that can make a case for himself in being the submissive person... much like yourself, he's purely passing on the hardship onto you.


*sorry, I don't know that word, when you teach someone in the third person? or in the past? tought? its not tought is it? when you've been teached something? oh god its difficult! ah I got all stressed now!

 

[Nimbus]

*sorry, I don't know that word, when you teach someone in the third person? or in the past? tought? its not tought is it? when you've been teached something? oh god its difficult! ah I got all stressed now!

Um, is it taught? I think it's taught...

 

[DigitalSushi]

but honestly? I don't care about being petty. I've tried being nice and considerate, and I got walked all over.

Your not petty, stay nice and considerate, you'll get alot more from being nice in the long run trust me. At least others will like you for who you are instead of treading around you just to stop you blowing up in their face.

Be nice to people, it pays off.

Exposition moment!
I'm nice to the dust bin man, whose covered in crap, I held out my hand to shake his hand and he said "but i'm dirty", I said "it doesn't matter".

My nephew fly tipped my brochures, to which I would have gotten a 1000 pound fine, the dirty dust bin man asked his superiors to not fine me, because it was my first offence, and I wouldn't do it again.

Being nice works in the long run.

 

[eatenbyagrue]

True. Factor in senility, and cultural stuff that screws with people all the time, and you could pretty much make him a semi-sympathetic character.

And to be perfectly honest, despite all the crap he gives me, he's still my dad. I'm named after him, I take a lot of my love of music from him, I learned how to enjoy camping and fishing from him.

It's just that for a lot of my life, things he's done have directly or indirectly made my life hell. I know it seems petty, but honestly? I don't care about being petty. I've tried being nice and considerate, and I got walked all over.

How old is your father?, he teached* you fishing and other stuff that he liked? and he was fine? probably because he was the rule maker in that when you was the rookie. Its why I love teaching my nephews Martial Arts, i'm stronger than they are, but when they grow up they will be stronger than me.

My uncles instilled respect into me, in that I was stronger than they are, but I should still respect them for the things they have teached* me made me stronger, without their impartial knowledge I would not be like this now.... You may surpass your teacher, but always respect him or her.

Your dad doesn't get that, you've surpassed him, but he wants respect and constant re assurance of it.

the reason he would be a semi sympathetic character is that he's the blue collar hard labourer that can make a case for himself in being the submissive person... much like yourself, he's purely passing on the hardship onto you.


*sorry, I don't know that word, when you teach someone in the third person? or in the past? tought? its not tought is it? when you've been teached something? oh god its difficult! ah I got all stressed now!

1) Taught.

2) My dad is far from blue collar. The family is one of those old-money families. He has never had to do hard labor in his entire life, even being able to skip ROTC when it was a requirement.

 

[DigitalSushi]

*sorry, I don't know that word, when you teach someone in the third person? or in the past? tought? its not tought is it? when you've been teached something? oh god its difficult! ah I got all stressed now!

Um, is it taught? I think it's taught...

ahh, thank you Nimbus, i'm rubbish at the written Language.

Speaking it is a different matter, I can talk the pants off most people in several different languages, but written one language is fucking difficult!

 

[DigitalSushi]

1) Taught.

2) My dad is far from blue collar. The family is one of those old-money families. He has never had to do hard labor in his entire life, even being able to skip ROTC when it was a requirement.

whats ROTC?

 

[Rigs83]

Here's the cure to all your familial problems, repeat after me
[HEADING=1]FUCK THEM![/HEADING]

repeat after me

[HEADING=1] INCESTUOUS COMMENT [/HEADING]

sorry, i see what you mean, but being an angry angst person doesn't actually help.

[HEADING=1]Fuck Them![/HEADING]
Is easier to say than
[HEADING=1]I will liberate myself from them and and all the negativity they bring into my life and strive to reach my goals in life and live to my own standards not theirs![/HEADING]
Wow I lose my breath just typing it, oh wait I think it's because i am fat and typing furiously.

 

[EeveeElectro]

Your parents sound like... yeah...
My mum never supports me, but still thinks she has bragging rights, telling her friends I get straight As and I'm amazing at drama, I'm gonna be an actress.
I've never got an A and she hasn't seen one of my plays for three years.

 

[eatenbyagrue]

1) Taught.

2) My dad is far from blue collar. The family is one of those old-money families. He has never had to do hard labor in his entire life, even being able to skip ROTC when it was a requirement.

whats ROTC?

Reserve Officers Training Corps.

Its a requirement for students in 4th year high school until they graduate from college. Basically, it's like boot camp, but more on "marching and rifle drills" than "physical fitness"

 

[Xorghul]

And to be perfectly honest, despite all the crap he gives me, he's still my dad.

ARRRRGH! You're seriously pissing me of with your "he's still my dad" bullshit.
Why should that make any difference? He's an arse!
Come to Europe! We need you!

 

[eatenbyagrue]

And to be perfectly honest, despite all the crap he gives me, he's still my dad.

ARRRRGH! You're seriously pissing me of with your "he's still my dad" bullshit.
Why should that make any difference? He's an arse!
Come to Europe! We need you!

It's messed up, but thats how I was raised.

People are hard-wired to seek acceptance from groups. It's a cultural thing, and being raised in said culture my entire life, I don't know how to think any other way. I'm much more free-spirited and open minded than most, but the fact still remains that I'm a product of that kind of culture.

Its weird and alien to Americans and Europeans, yes, but thats what happens when cultures develop differently.

 

[Xorghul]

This is part of why I hate humanity.

 

[happysock]

Stick it to the man lol. Anyway good on you next thing you know you'll be head of a revolutionary movement

 

[JacOak]

Nasty. Seems to me you're in that "no going back zone" now. Fight against the restraints and hypocrisies of your parents - show them the error of their ways.
It's the best thing to do.

Also, your Dad sounds a helluva lot like mine (minus the old-money stuff). Tell me, has he ever given you a contemptuous look as soon as you enter the room?

 

[Dusty Donuts]

Fellow Escapists, let me tell you something about myself.

The story is not in the getting in, but in the night before. My father, bastard that he is, called me to the living room, and told me "I fully expect you to fail this, and I'm only letting you embarrass yourself so you can't whine about how I never supported you." That my friends, is possibly the WORST thing a father can say to his eldest son right before an entrance exam, bar none.

Me being me, I'd probably make some sort of stupid joke about it. Fully encompassing the seriousness of the situation, I hold that joke.
Why? Just why?
Another question, how do they treat your younger brother?

 

[eatenbyagrue]

Nasty. Seems to me you're in that "no going back zone" now. Fight against the restraints and hypocrisies of your parents - show them the error of their ways.
It's the best thing to do.

Also, your Dad sounds a helluva lot like mine (minus the old-money stuff). Tell me, has he ever given you a contemptuous look as soon as you enter the room?

I can sense that look even before I enter the room. Its his default expression

Fellow Escapists, let me tell you something about myself.

The story is not in the getting in, but in the night before. My father, bastard that he is, called me to the living room, and told me "I fully expect you to fail this, and I'm only letting you embarrass yourself so you can't whine about how I never supported you." That my friends, is possibly the WORST thing a father can say to his eldest son right before an entrance exam, bar none.

Me being me, I'd probably make some sort of stupid joke about it. Fully encompassing the seriousness of the situation, I hold that joke.
Why? Just why?
Another question, how do they treat your younger brother?

Just as bad. He told my brother the same thing when he was taking his high school equivalence test (he dropped out of high school), and before taking an exam to enter a culinary institute in Canada.

Let me put it this way: after the kid dropped out of high school, dad forced him to take a job at the family restaurant. After 2 years, the kid started to get good at the job, even without having to rely on nepotism: he was the go-to-guy in the bakery department, and could be trusted with all sorts of responsibilities.

Then dad said "Okay, now quit your job, I don't want you to work there." To this day, neither of us can come up with an explanation for why he did that.

 

[Burck]

*snip*
So, after a year of this, I've finally had enough. I waited until this weekend, when they would be gone Saturday and Sunday, to move the PC back up into my room. Its my way of telling them "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR SH*T, AND I WON'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" It was the moment where I would finally grow a spine, instead of quietly hoping they would relent, I would go and seize my opportunity to improve my life. Carpe diem folks, seize the day.
*snip*

Wait, so your idea of saying "I HAVE HAD ENOUGHT OF YOUR SH*T" is to be passive aggressive?
Passive aggression solves nothing. Be direct. You've stepped up from "quietly hoping" to quietly acting, so take it up another notch and act loudly.
Take up your issues with your parents directly, confront them. If they don't listen, try getting a group therapy session to see if that helps get through to them.

 

[Disaster Button]

So, after a year of this, I've finally had enough. I waited until this weekend, when they would be gone Saturday and Sunday, to move the PC back up into my room. Its my way of telling them "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR SH*T, AND I WON'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" It was the moment where I would finally grow a spine, instead of quietly hoping they would relent, I would go and seize my opportunity to improve my life. Carpe diem folks, seize the day.

Moving your PC, hmm. What a BOLD statement

Why don't you just move out? Or talk to your parents. Not the kind of sit down over a cup of tea talk. You tell them what's going to happen and tell them what dickholes they are. Couldn't hurt. They seem to do it to you often enough