Jabbo the Gnome.

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Mr Fatherland

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Nov 10, 2008
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This is a short story I wrote in a geography lesson while bored, I hope you like it. Any feedback is welcome.

One day, a little Gnome called Jabbo ventured out of the big garden, at first he was frightened of the fast moving vehicles and vicious(?) creatures but soon he became a hardened Gnome warrior. He learnt how to hunt things like cats instead of being the hunted and he learnt how to craft complicated, but deadly traps.

In his travels, Jabbo came across a slug. He'd only seen a slug once before and he'd been attacked by it. It had taken him an hour to kill the beast but it had been worth it, the slug meat had provided him with food for a whole week. He had heard rumours of slugs with protective armour on their backs, but he dismissed them. Nothing could be that hard to kill.

Anyway, this slug had been sleeping until Jabbo appeared,
"What are you doing in my house?" Asked the slug.
"It's raining outside and I was looking for some shelter," Jabbo answered.
"Well, come on in, I have some wine for this occasion. I haven't had visitors in months and I was getting very lonely." Jabbo sat down in the slug's kitchen and waited for his host to return.

After the slug had ushered him to the guest room, he undressed and climbed into the bed. The slug was relly very nice, unlike the first slug he had met.

He woke up with the slug looming over him.
"Rise and shine my little friend, hope you had a nice sleep." Jabbo opened his eyes to to the vision of the slug holding a tray with some freshly squeezed pine cone juice and some toasted acorns balanced precariously on it.
"Er, thankyou." Said Jabbo, slightly suprised.
"Got to be on your way today sorry, I got family coming round later and I don't think they'll take lightly to me having a Gnome in the house. Some of them are still the racist types," He adjusted his monocle."I'll meet you downstairs to see you off." When Jabbo got downstairs there was some kind of talisman lying on the table.
"I wanted to give you this," Said the slug.

As Jabbo wandered through the forest, he wondered what the slug had told him, Apparently, the talisman worked like a portal, and when Jabbo called the slug's name, he would appear out of the portal to help Jabbo. Jabbo thought this was rubbish, but it looked nice enough so he decided to keep it as a reminder of the slug.

A few weeks later, Jabbo was battling his way through a dungeon, so far he had killed a few spiders and worms. He was slowly working his way to the bottom, and the creatures were slowly getting tougher.

He pushed open the big wooden doors that lay at the very bottom of the dungeon. Darkness lay heavily over the room, he pulled a torch out from his bag and lit it. His eyes could not believe what they were seeing, for in the middle of the room lay a snail.

With a roar, the snail knocked Jabbo off his feet. He went flying across the room. I cant last much longer if he keeps doing that Jabbo thought. He pulled out his talisman and whispered the slug's name into it, sure enough, a portal opened up next to him. The slug looked at Jabbo, then at the snail, then at Jabbo again, and then lunged at the snail.

The snail and the slug fought for many hours, Jabbo was watching at the sidelines. Then, with a mighty blow, the slug killed the snail. Jabbo cheered for the slug. He was clearly exhausted with the fight he just had.
Jabbo and the slug slowly moved out of the snail's lair. Suddenly, the slug went taut(?), Jabbo was horrified to see that with its dying breath, the snail had felled the slug.

The distraught Gnome held the slug's head in his hands. Tears strolled down his face unchecked. The slug shuddered, Death knocking at his door.
"I never did like snails Jabbo." Then the slug died.

Jabbo walked out of the dungeon, his heart heavy.
"This will be a tale told to all," he said to no-one in particular,"Everyone shall know the slug's name, and of his bravery."

Jabbo walked out into the forest. In search of more adventures.


Hoped you liked it, and well done for getting to the end.
 

Kabutos

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Oct 21, 2008
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You never did say the slug's name. Or maybe it's because I'm too dense and it's on purpose. But other than that, I liked it, although what size gnome are we talking about? Because Even a fairly small sized garden gnome would be able to step on a snail.
 

Mr Fatherland

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Madnezz said:
You never did say the slug's name. Or maybe it's because I'm too dense and it's on purpose. But other than that, I liked it, although what size gnome are we talking about? Because Even a fairly small sized garden gnome would be able to step on a snail.
Use your imagination, he can be as big as you want him to be.
 

curlycrouton

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Jul 13, 2008
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Well, it was very imaginative. Not particularily well-written, but then I doubt you were going for that. Perhaps someone should make that into a level for Psychonauts 2.
 

Jack and Calumon

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Dec 29, 2008
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Very good. Reminds me of those Gnome Killers bout a year ago, where gnomes were killing people in Norway.

Don't ask.
 

The Oddfellow

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Jan 30, 2009
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I'd give an 8.5/10
The story is good.
The punctuation is a little simple.
But the structure of the story is well presented.
 

Davey Woo

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Jan 9, 2009
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Good story. But seriously.

I've never encountered a Geography lesson so boring I've had to conjure up a short story to get through.
 

StarStruckStrumpets

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Jan 17, 2009
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WOW, I've finally found this thread. Now I will begin reading XD.

Nah, we all liked this (We being "our" group of friends.) because it fits our sense of humour.
 

SckizoBoy

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Jan 6, 2011
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A Hermit's Cave
Will you guys quit switching your user accounts... it's confusing(!) -_-

OT: Would you mind submitting yourself for a lobotomy? I have free token you could use...