Jimquisition: Fake Nerd Girls

[Adeptus Aspartem]

This 'Fake Nerd Girl' thing is insane and frankly only worth laughing at. Think about it, why would ANYONE pretend to be a nerd to get the attention of the sort of prat who would call them out on it for whatever badly thought out reason they have?

I personally know a girl who does just that. Is actually a dear friend of mine nowadays. Had some honest talks with her.
The result was: She admitted that she just likes being the center of a group, getting all the attention. And it's just easier with nerds, because they're usually not around beautiful women who at least fake to share their interest.
Her words, not mine.

Also a reason why she only keeps female friends which are not as pretty as her. Totally shallow and superficial.
I could witness this phenomenon after our talk in a few other girls too. They usually seem to be around 15-20 (basically very young) and had a rough time and often had problems at home.

I know anecdotal evidence isn't prove of anything, but "attention whores" are nothing special and are not only apparent in the gamer community. But they still piss me off - doesnt matter if they're male or female.

It's kinda the gamer-type counterpart to girls who call men to go out to party, cocktease them so they pay their drinks and then go home alone. It's dishonest and manipulating and i can understand anyone who's upset by such behavior.

 

[Zydrate]

This is the kind of thing that's brought up when I brag that my mother has a level 85 on World of Warcraft.
I then mention that she doesn't do dungeons, raids, or anything that has to do with grouping with people.
Then sometimes people talk about how my mother isn't really playing the game.

Fuck those people. They're missing the point. My mother plays World of Warcraft, and that's awesome in itself. Who cares how she plays it?

 

[Cecilthedarkknight_234]

Um, can someone please tell me what is the name of that game with big burly men running through walls?

Muscle March.

Eeewwwww. That name is possibly even more disturbing than the game footage.

It's a Japanese game aimed at woman that homosexuality relationships with beef guys, believe me there are lot more of them out there including 2d rail shooters.

I don't personally find anything wrong with it at all I mean hell japan is willing to please both sexes with fantasy smut instead of catering to one.

 

[nazipunkfuckoff]

People don't like it when what they viewed as a counterculture is appropriated by the mainstream.

Everything else is personal idiocy.

This wasn't even a thing until articles started being written about it over a silly comic.

 

[Beautiful End]

-snip!-

Yeah, I also work for GameStop and I see what you're talking about a lot. My girlfriend also works for the company and I see her getting quizzed all the time. It's pretty stupid, and sad, because I've seen more guys working for GameStop that know less about what they're talking about than gals. And yet there are guys that will walk straight past our female employees if they see there's a man available to help them. =/

I swear that was the example I was about to give when I started reading your comment. DX

If there's two of us standing behind the counter, me closest to the door and another guy minding his own business, and a guy walks into the store, they automatically skip me and go over to the guy. It doesn't happen all the time because I usually go all "CAN I HELP YOU?" as soon as they walk in and not everyone is a douche. But it happens very often and most of my male co-workers don't believe me at all or refuse to see it.

There's also the guy who starts questioning about every single game. "Do you know how many players this is? Do you know the year it came out? Do you know what this random indie game is about? Have you played Halo Reach? Did you ever play MAG? Do you remember Battletoads?"
I mean, dang! I know about games but I'm pretty sure if I start quizzing random gamers, even guys, they wouldn't know all of the answers!

On the other hand, I also get a lot of guys hitting on me simply because 1. BOOBS and 2. I like games. And I also hate that. I'm not saying I'm beautiful or ugly; that's not even an issue at that point. And it also sucks when I find a guy that's willing to listen to me rant about how I didn't like RE: ORC or tell them to try Fez or something without the words "So can I have your number?" following my monologue.
Another reason wh it bothers me so much is because we have a girl at work who doesn't know a lot about games (Except for random JRPGs) who will literally date any guy who hits on girl. So she DOES use her little gaming knowledge to get numbers. Ugh.

I don't know if that makes sense to everyone. But it's annoying.

 

[Therumancer]

I rarely agree this much with him. Seriously, why would anyone get upset over a person being so desperate for your attention that she pretends to like what you do just to get attention? It seems like a strange thing to get upset over, but I don't know.

You, like Jim, miss the point entirely. It's not girls wanting to fit in or being "desperate for your attention" it's girls out to manipulate nerds, either for their own ends, or being paid to do so by someone else (like in the case of booth babes and the like).

I wrote a more detailed answer (phrased to aim it directly at Jim) earlier, but I imagine it was too long for a lot of people, and also not what they'd want to hear.

I'm sure this happens to you all the time so it's a really big deal, but having never seen someone I can't see this being widespread.

Of course manipulation of anyone is a problem, but are those who pretend to like games any different than any other kind of manipulation? Why is it specific focus on those who pretend to like games rather than those who manipulate in any other way?

Now if you say they are no different, explain why you draw a line separating those. Why is it fake nerd girls rather than manipulative behaviour in full that gets you riled up?

Well, manipulative behavior riles most people when you get down to it. The whole "fake nerd girl" thing is simply a kind of manipulative behavior, which is why it gets such strong, negative responses. My problem is that it needs to be understood as a manipulative behavior in order to understand the reaction.

As far as I go, my direct experience has been seeing some pretty solid guilds ripped apart by this kind of thing, and otherwise viewing the damage in various internet communities. For the most part I don't deal with it myself since my internet persona is pretty bloody unapproachable and not especially well liked (even if not hated). You might of course also realize at this point there are reasons why I carry myself the way I do.

In the first post I wrote I went into more detail, but let's just say there was an issue with this kind of thing before it wound up on the radar of sites like The Escapist and commentators like Jim. The whole chan-inspired "Tits or GTFO" is pretty much in response to the "faux nerd girl", rather than just being a matter of general sexism. It basically coming down to the stereotype of some cute girl coming into fringe culture, flirting, and then showing her boobs for gifts (even if worked into subtly). The basic schtick basically being "you might as well just show me your tits now, and get the pretensions over with", or a sort of "I'm onto you". This is why when you see a cute-seeming girl being unusually friendly or acting geeky someone will toss one of the many versions of that copypasta her way.

 

[GodzillaGuy92]

I dunno... I think I'm gonna have to disagree with Jim's core point here, which doesn't happen too often. Setting aside the question of whether these girls actually exist and in what numbers (for the record, he was spot-on about how females come under unfair scrutiny for expressing traditionally-male interests), I do in fact find the concept of them annoying. As someone mentioned earlier in the thread, the whole controversy is basically an extension of the ongoing debate over booth babes (a subject Jim addressed, oddly, a lot more evenly less than a month ago); the reason some people want to abandon the booth babe practice is because they feel irritated and uncomfortable in response to being pandered to. The chief difference here is that these alleged fake nerd girls aren't posing as nerds because they're employed by a publisher cynically attempting to sell their game, but instead do it purely of their own volition because they're looking for some easy attention.

Bottom line: Females get a lot more flak and suspicion for it, and that's screwed up, but the fact remains that whether you're a guy or a girl, no one likes a lying attention whore.

 

[Olas]

Jim is being a bit overzealous. There's a difference between disliking something and being "outraged" by it. I'd just like people to be genuine, you know? When a person's enthusiasm is artificial it shows in many subtle ways, and suddenly I feel like I'm being pandered to by cold calculating marketers instead of people who actually understand games and other things I like.

Do I care if the girl really likes games? No.

But if she doesn't I'd rather she just be honest about it and act that way. I'd trust her and respect her more for her strait forward about her interests at the risk of not being quite as appealing to us male gamers who apparently their desperate to please(?)

Though ideally I'd rather they just get someone who genuinely likes games, whether that be an attractive girl or a scary bearded hobo.

 

[piclemaniscool]

No.

Jim's idea of the situation is wrong. It is not about conventions. I always go to conventions assuming everyone mutually enjoys the thing and anyone who doesn't is free to leave. No, the real fake gamer girl problem lies with the girls that will wear Mario, Sonic, and Kingdom Hearts paraphernalia that DEFINITELY have not played the games. They most likely bought it at Hot Topic, as that has always been the case in the past. But if I go up to a good looking girl and say, "hey, I like your Kingdom Hearts shirt," I'm suddenly met with stares like I was rubbing my hands and licking my lips while staring at her tits. I genuinely thought a girl shared my common interest of the Disney/Squaresoft JRPG.

Well fuck her. I didn't do anything wrong and now she thinks I'm going to rape her because I SOMEHOW know the origin of her shirt? Shy should I have to be rejected in such a bad way. And it wasn't one time, no. I've been as polite as possible, but trying to find common ground with these girls is, to them, following them down a back alley way. You wonder why I'm awkward around girls? This is why.

It's like that Dave Chappelle act, where he likens dressing in whore's clothing to dressing in a police officer's uniform. You can't just say it's my fault when you're wearing the uniform.

 

[Ryan Minns]

I have honestly never see this, not in person or even on the internet. Not that my experience shows anything but I only ever see women get massive amounts of positive attention and if they infact don't know something the people talking them them try to discuss it and inform just like they do with guys.

 

[infinity_turtles]

Two reasons for the hate. General dislike of posers but more importantly the fact that it's manipulative. I'd compare it to going out to a bar and watching one of your friends hit it off with a girl there, only to realize she's just using him for free food and drinks. Or if you want a more direct cross-gender comparison, a smooth-talking guy specifically hanging around girls he thinks are desperate while pretending to share their interests. It's scummy behavior as far as I'm concerned. Grilling girls and women over their credentials is taking things too far though. Noone jumps into a hobby knowing excessive details, and I figure if you encourage more women to take up the hobby they'll root out most of the fakes on their own.

 

[OuroborosChoked]

-snip!-

There's also the guy who starts questioning about every single game. "Do you know how many players this is? Do you know the year it came out? Do you know what this random indie game is about? Have you played Halo Reach? Did you ever play MAG? Do you remember Battletoads?"
I mean, dang! I know about games but I'm pretty sure if I start quizzing random gamers, even guys, they wouldn't know all of the answers!

I might be reading this wrong... so I might be thinking about an entirely different kind of person, here... a kind I'm sure you'll be familiar with anyway... but are you talking about the guys who just start asking:

Him: "Have you played Mario Galaxy?"
You: "Yeah, I really enjoyed the way you could walk the whole way around the variou..."
Him: "Have you played Modern Warfare 3?"
You: "Yes... I don't think it was..."
Him: "Have you heard of Portal?"

The guy who's not quizzing you... but just doesn't know how to have conversations, only plays video games, and may or may not have something wrong with him upstairs. The guys who just stand at the counter all day long talking to the staff about every game, yet don't have any opinions of their own... or if they do, they don't make any sense.

If that's who you're talking about, don't take that personally. They're just trying to hold a conversation because they feel that's what normal people do. They're not judging you.

Then again, if that's not who you're talking about, yeah... they're douchebags and you should throw them out of the store.

 

[Beautiful End]

-snip!-

There's also the guy who starts questioning about every single game. "Do you know how many players this is? Do you know the year it came out? Do you know what this random indie game is about? Have you played Halo Reach? Did you ever play MAG? Do you remember Battletoads?"
I mean, dang! I know about games but I'm pretty sure if I start quizzing random gamers, even guys, they wouldn't know all of the answers!

I might be reading this wrong... so I might be thinking about an entirely different kind of person, here... a kind I'm sure you'll be familiar with anyway... but are you talking about the guys who just start asking:

Him: "Have you played Mario Galaxy?"
You: "Yeah, I really enjoyed the way you could walk the whole way around the variou..."
Him: "Have you played Modern Warfare 3?"
You: "Yes... I don't think it was..."
Him: "Have you heard of Portal?"

The guy who's not quizzing you... but just doesn't know how to have conversations, only plays video games, and may or may not have something wrong with him upstairs. The guys who just stand at the counter all day long talking to the staff about every game, yet don't have any opinions of their own... or if they do, they don't make any sense.

If that's who you're talking about, don't take that personally. They're just trying to hold a conversation because they feel that's what normal people do. They're not judging you.

Then again, if that's not who you're talking about, yeah... they're douchebags and you should throw them out of the store.

Oh, no, no. We have plenty of people who are really awkward at conversations or have ADD or something like that. Heck, I'm pretty awkward when it comes to conversations that do not relate to videogames (though I can manage to look casual/normal...I think). Those guys I don't mind.

It's the guys that give me that look of "Aw, how cute. You think you know games" when they talk to me. It's those guys who continuously quiz me until I give them a wrong answer so they're satisfied. It's the guys who think they know more than I do (Again, whether it's true or not is irrelevant) and patronize me. It's the guys that probably think I got the job because I slept with the manager and they should be the ones working there because clearly, they know more about games than I could ever know.

It's sad to think here are still douchebags like that around. :l

 

[SycoMantis91]

Disagree here, pandering CAN be insulting on it's own.

Like when I'm whatching an anime and the heroine is obviously put together as a male wish fulfillment character, being quirky, and in love with the fat miserable nerd protagonist, etc. It doesn't hurt anyone, but it's kind of insulting my intelligence.

I'm not sure either if a ort of IRL equivalent to that really exists somewhere, with girls trying to invoke something like this, and you obviously shouldn't be stereotyping gamer girls in general ('cause that's just mysoginistic), or obsess over who is and isn't a true nerd ('cause that's just sad), but i see that there MIGHT be occasional blatant cases that feel insultingly manipulative.

I agree with this. Not only that it is insulting, but it also gives the impression that that's all us guys want or that that's the only reason we watch anime or play video games.

 

[Reincarnatedwolfgod]

by Fake Nerd Girls Phenomenon i think people mean attention whores and posers because every group has those. and the way i see it there is no point in even paying any mind to said posers.

if posers are bothering you i suggest ignore them. they will go away eventually. also unfairly assuming most females who play games are posers and or attention whores because there female; it just makes you an idiot.

 

[NaramSuen]

Far too shout-outs to the great Count Duckula in this thread in my opinion.

This thing needs to go away, right now. A woman has to answer a trivia contest to enter the club!?! Grow up, get a life, and stop being a dick.

That being said, if you feel that you are been exploited by any company for any reasons, then stop supporting these companies. At the same time, write them a hand-written letter explaining that you cannot continue to support their company financially given their current business practices. Stop whining about your perceived grievances and take some action. Don't get mad at the cute girl in the Princess Leia outfit who isn't quite sure if 2-1B is the assassin droid or the medical droid.

 

[Jennacide]

My only view on the whole issue is that it's a goddam nuisance, and yet I sadly get part of it. I get called out on being a nerd infrequently, and while I'm loathe to dignify it, I also see the flip side, groups using any form of pop culture as a vessel to exploit for money. But that should be the dividing line, if I walk around in my Dr Mundo shirt, assume I'm wearing it because I like League of Legends, unless I suddenly try and sell you RP or something, leave it be.

I think it boils down to the term 'poser,' and it does go to both genders, it's just not flagrantly obvious between males. I've still gone into game stores and watched guys call each other out for claiming to have played X, and then get caught lying about it. Guys just won't complain about it when it happens because gender had no say in it, they got caught lying. But when a woman is involved, the stupid assumption is that we're lying.

 

[T_ConX]

The problem with 'Fake Nerd Girls' isn't the fact that they're girls. The problem is that they're fake. It's not like there aren't 'Fake Nerd Boys' out there. They happen to be smaller in number, and much more subtle, but they exist.

The problem is that at some point in the last few years, smart suddenly became cool. Once Facebook took our social lives and we started carrying supercomputers in our pockets, being seen as technologically literate was a good thing. While this is certainly a good thing, the sad fact is that once being a nerd became cool, you there was a sudden influx of people who wanting in, even if they didn't belong.

"Nerds are cool, and I want to be cool, so I have to do things that nerds do! What do nerds do? Uh... they watch Sci-Fi TV shows! I can do that! And they play video games! I'll do some of that too!"

OH! You played a video game? That sure took some effort. You watched an episode of Star Trek? That must have been HARD!

Here's how you tell if someone is a fake nerd:

Do they brag about doing something 'nerdy' that isn't really worth bragging about?

If they constantly feel the need to 'prove' that they're nerds, and the best proof they can offer up is 'I occasionally play video games' or 'I once watched a TV show that had a spaceship or time-machine in it', well, then they get an E for effort!

No really! If you go to Twitter (NOT RECOMMENDED) and look at the tweets under #suchanerd, you would be amazed at how many people think 'reading a book' or 'playing Call of Duty' earns them nerd cred.

Jim says it's wrong for us to demand that a girl provide us with her nerd credentials when we never ask the boys for the same thing. The sad truth is that we don't need to ask for their nerd credentials. Why would we have to, especially when they're always shoving them in our faces? Of course, we're suddenly labeled territorial assholes when we say how lacking we find their 'nerdy accomplishments' to be.

 

[Mechanix]

I guess it comes down to pandering and being fake. It's hardly a problem only video games face. And I highly doubt video games "suffer" the most from this. I'm a little bit more concerned about people trying to act tough and cool, when in actuality they are just desperately trying to get some attention.

Bottom line is, if a girl likes video games, that's pretty cool. I'd like to get to know her maybe. But if I find out a woman is just kind of pretending to be a "gamer girl" to get some easy attention from desperate guys, it doesn't exactly make me like her any more.

 

[hentropy]

Normal gender issues can't be ignored. Western culture is such since the day we go into kindergarten, friend groups, and as such interests, are divided along gender lines. When puberty hits, most guys see other guys as their "friends", but it's harder to see a girl as simply a "friend". I've had some guy friends that haven't been incredibly knowledgeable on interests we share, but I thought little of it, even if they were 'pretending' to be huge fans of a certain band but only owned one album and a tee-shirt, it wasn't a big deal to me. The same thing goes for people of the other sex.

The reason I think there is white-hot fury on the behalf of men over gamer "posers" who happened to be female is the same reason someone might get pissed off the first time they get scammed or see an advertisement about a free iPad and find out it's not really free, because they see women more as potential mates than potential friends. Every nerd, deep down, wants an attractive and outgoing girl who likes all the same things they like with the same knowledge they have. When it is then revealed that they do not have an encyclopedic knowledge of the Fallout universe like they do, it's not just a difference in perspective as to what makes a "nerd", it's an immoral deception, like lying on a resume. Except the resume isn't for a friend, it's for a girlfriend. They see a girl cosplaying and don't see someone who is just having fun, they see an attractive girl who might just be their dream girl, and when it turns out she isn't, they just don't get disappointed due to unrealistic expectations, they get pissed and go on semi-sexist rants on the Internet.

I never personally had this problem as I grew up surrounded by females, some of which shared some of my interests as I shared some of their interests, able to see them as human beings and form platonic friendships with them, but others have trouble seeing women as anything other than potential mates.