Know any great analogies?

[Stalk3rchief]

My friend just came to me with this.

"I feel like I ran out of words.
Like when you get to the bottom of a bag of cheks mix and all you have left are prezelts..
You still have stuff left, but you dont want it any more..
and you need to get a new bag."

I thought this was genius and groundbreaking, so I want to know what the rest of you have heard or can come up with right now on the spot.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

Blackadder the British comedy series, is renowned for them. Enjoy.

 

[Palademon]

Well, one I often use that I made up is " is slower than a dead snail...under a rock...in a block of ice...in a dimension where time no longer exists".

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

*IDENTITY WITHHELD TO AVOID SPOILERS*: ~"They say one is less than two. We say two is less than three. Both are different, neither is an error."

Made me like that character a lot.


My dad: ~"Life is like a toilet paper roll. It runs out faster the closer you get to the end".

"I feel like I ran out of words.
Like when you get to the bottom of a bag of cheks mix and all you have left are prezelts..
You still have stuff left, but you dont want it any more..
and you need to get a new bag."

That is really good! High five your friend for me!

 

[katsumoto03]

Life is like a box of chocolates... *derp*

 

[MightyMole]

"I burst through the window like a platypus out of an adult video store."

 

[Easton Dark]

 

[tigermilk]

Hegemony ladies and gentleman (control through consent)

"Two bulls at the top of a hill. The younger cow looks to the older cow and says why don't we run down there and fuck one of those cows. The old cow looks to the younger cow and says no... We'll walk down there and fuck them all".

EDIT: It doesn't really do justice to Gramsci's theory but I loved its use in The Sopranos.

 

[Escapist Account]

...Oh wow. I usually have a lot of these but I can't remember a single damn one. Oh! Got one. There is a snowball's chance in hell that (insert whatever here) will happen.

 

[Ghaleon640]

If you choose to be a stupid person, stupid things happen to you.
It is something I am learning each day.

 

[bdcjacko]

I'm pretty good with coming up with them on the spot.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

"[insert thing] smells worse than the dead hooker in my garage"

"as shit as a Jeremy Clarkson analogy"

 

[kane.malakos]

I was always fond of these:

Spoiler

http://www.losteyeball.com/index.php/2007/06/19/56-worstbest-analogies-of-high-school-students/

Particularly, "McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup."

 

[norwegian-guy]

Love is like a final exam.
When you try to put it into words, it never comes out the way you wanted.

 

[ssgt splatter]

My friend, you are as useless as a stripper with no booty.

I'll admit, I took that one from an internet video entilted, "I Suck, You Suck, I Suck at Call of Duty."
It's a fun video to watch if you want a good laugh.

 

[smearyllama]

Slower than a claw-foot bathtub, made of solidified molasses, in a lake of frozen molasses, attempting to get through DC traffic, in a snowstorm.
While Neo is using bullet-time.