looking for love!
- Thread starter gonzo20
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Ive never really tried before because i was very depressed and just not all that confident but after talking to someone about it at a therapy thing i feel like im ready to accept someone else into my life, i had one in high school but i wouldnt really count it as a proper relationshipxShredd said:
Go online.
Join every dating site you can find. Make a detailed, thoughtful profile that "sells you" without sounding artificial. Be funny and truthful. Include recent photos. Do not overdo the self-deprecation.
Send winks/messages to every single girl on every single site who catches your eye.
Some of those girls will respond.
Some of the respondents will enjoy speaking to you.
Make a date with them.
Some of those dates will pan out.
If you're fortunate, one will become a girlfriend.
When that happens, come to the forums and make a post complaining about how you have no free time any more. =)
Join every dating site you can find. Make a detailed, thoughtful profile that "sells you" without sounding artificial. Be funny and truthful. Include recent photos. Do not overdo the self-deprecation.
Send winks/messages to every single girl on every single site who catches your eye.
Some of those girls will respond.
Some of the respondents will enjoy speaking to you.
Make a date with them.
Some of those dates will pan out.
If you're fortunate, one will become a girlfriend.
When that happens, come to the forums and make a post complaining about how you have no free time any more. =)
Be yourself. Girls will like you for who you are, not just the acting that you could be doing. And be confident, that alone will make you look attractive. And please don't be an asshole, no matter what you do. Not that you are, but just make sure you don't act like one. 
Good luck, OP! And keep us updated if you need more help.
Good luck, OP! And keep us updated if you need more help.
thank youthesilentman said:Be yourself. Girls will like you for who you are, not just the acting that you could be doing. And be confident, that alone will make you look attractive. And please don't be an asshole, no matter what you do. Not that you are, but just make sure you don't act like one.
Good luck, OP! And keep us updated if you need more help.
yeah my only issue is figuring out what to say to people or just general converstaion >.< i always struggle with it, i wonder why poeple are even friends with me at times!
Smile at her, and scan her features (this, obviously, excludes the boobs; except for maybe a cheeky glance).gonzo20 said:
Don't be afraid of silences, they're only awkward if they're going on very long or if there are many of them. On the first and second dates, both of you are still testing the waters, so moments like that are expected.
Anyway, ask a lot of questions about her life (but keep it superficial), her interests, her work/study. That should give you enough leads to keep asking and/or the conversation going.
It's also a nice way to test whether she's interested in you, because at some point she (ideally) will ask you similar questions.
-Edit-
I don't know how you look, but assuming that you're an average Joe who has little interest in appearance (who, like most men, grabs something out of the closet and maintains his personal hygiene); it pays dividend to spend 10 minutes a day longer on your appearance. Ask yourself questions as:
"Do I look like I got style?"
Also, if you don't already, contemplate wearing sport coats/jackets.
Do a fun, preferably physical activity before you guys finally sit down and talk to each other, like bowling or putt putt or even a casual painting class that has you laughing at each others terrible paintings. Trust me, it does wonders to the conversation afterwards when you guys end up having a great time with each other (it won't take away the awkward pauses though, they will happen but they're not as bad as you think).gonzo20 said:
Best of luck, eh!
I always thought that relationships were something like a game.gonzo20 said:thanks everyone for posting
You have to just keep trying until you meet the right person, and along the way, you will develop the confidence and skills necessary to get you where you want to be.
I find it best to meet people not too close towork/ school etc so that if s@@t hits the fan you can just move on not have to worry about having to try to patch things up at school/ work later.
Erm...gonzo20 said:
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...no, I've got nothing. I've had relationships, but I always seem to just stumble into them by accident. Whenever I've actually wanted a relationship with someone they've not been interested. So I guess just wait, bumbling along through your ordinary life, until something happens?