Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)
- Thread starter RaNDM G
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"HAHAHAHA-Fuck no! If we let him on he'll try to blow up our ship with a mechanical giant dog or something. Unless you know how to silence and trap him."
"Yeah, the only reason he hasn't driven US insane is because, well, we're already completely fucking crazy... so, please take him, kill him and dump his body in a star far away from here."
I think for a few seconds.
"If we work together, then we can probably get him to stay quiet and tied up long enough for you guys to do whatever you want to him. In fact, get me a dress, some hair extensions and a taser, I'll try it myself."
I think for a few seconds.
"If we work together, then we can probably get him to stay quiet and tied up long enough for you guys to do whatever you want to him. In fact, get me a dress, some hair extensions and a taser, I'll try it myself."
Some muttering occurs, however it's inaudible on the broadcast.
"You have 1 hour. If you succeed, we can let you go. But to make sure...We've just planted a bomb in a very important part of your ship. If this ship is destroyed, the bomb will go off. If we lose contact, or you get too far away, it'll go off. And if you try to fuck us over, then it goes off. Good luck"
The conversation ends.
"You have 1 hour. If you succeed, we can let you go. But to make sure...We've just planted a bomb in a very important part of your ship. If this ship is destroyed, the bomb will go off. If we lose contact, or you get too far away, it'll go off. And if you try to fuck us over, then it goes off. Good luck"
The conversation ends.
"How did they put a bomb on board?" My tulpa opens some beartraps and lugs them into the mall.
"Paddy, we are not very competent. They probably teleported in, walked right past us and set it up while I was deciding what colour of dress would distract Woon long enough for us to knock him out." I point out. "Incidentally, I'm thinking black."
I walk into the Mall and start creating my brilliant disguise.
I walk into the Mall and start creating my brilliant disguise.
"True. And black is very flattering on you Tril, you should wear it more often." My tulpa sets out some bear traps.
I continue walking through the field of dicks, before spotting something over the horizon. My frown turns upside down as I gasp in delight.
"Thanks." I say while sellotaping the Staff of Genderswapping back together. I give myself a quick blast, then start changing my outfit.
I start thinking.
"I... I really don't know. I'm not even sure if he's straight or not... meh. This is only meant to distract him long enough for me to taser him, so you guys can tie him up and gag him."
"I... I really don't know. I'm not even sure if he's straight or not... meh. This is only meant to distract him long enough for me to taser him, so you guys can tie him up and gag him."
I appear on the bridge of the Pirates ship, exploding out of a console in a spray of sparks and super-heated metal.
"Evening gents."
"Evening gents."
"SHIT! RELEASE THE KRAKEN!"
A bunch of sheep shuffle up to Sigma.
[small]"I swear to God Bradley, can you do anything right?"[/small]
I phone Sigma.
"Dude, what am I looking for?"
A bunch of sheep shuffle up to Sigma.
[small]"I swear to God Bradley, can you do anything right?"[/small]
I phone Sigma.
"Dude, what am I looking for?"
"Bollocks"
I fumble for my sword, accidently zapping the sheep with my Infinite Extrapolation Gun. Sheep start to fill up the bridge.
"Double bollocks."
I swan dive out of the airlock and respawn by Zombie.
"Try tracking him through his respawn matrix. Or just #Yoloswaggie it"
I fumble for my sword, accidently zapping the sheep with my Infinite Extrapolation Gun. Sheep start to fill up the bridge.
"Double bollocks."
I swan dive out of the airlock and respawn by Zombie.
"Try tracking him through his respawn matrix. Or just #Yoloswaggie it"
I glance out of a conveniently placed porthole at the other ship, and see sheep getting sucked out of the airlock.
"I think we might be safe. Or in even more danger."
"I think we might be safe. Or in even more danger."
I respond to Knife, my voice not immediately recognisable due to the genderswapping. "I don't think they're New Zealanders. The sheep are probably Sigma's fault. And it's been a few minutes now. They put a bomb on our ship, and they'll blow us up in about an hour if we don't give them Woon. And he has to be gagged and bound because he's really annoying. So... we're going to give them Woon. Okay? Okay."