Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Saltarius]

I breathe in and out heavily as the burning subsides.

"Can I...*cough* open my eyes now?"

"Whadday talking about Spades? They're already wide open."

"What are you talking about? I can't see anything."

"Probably because I just poured acid in your eyes. You're blind dumbass. Now get the hell out of here."

One of them grabs the chair and uties me before unceremoniously throwing me out into the alley.

"Oh, and you might want this."

He tossses me a pair of sunglasses which I luckily catch and put on. I proceed to fumble my way across the alley.

Spoiler: Captcha

face the music

...Fuck you, Captcha.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I grab the door before it shuts.

"Hey there."

I grin under the hood, pull out a knife and slit the man's throat.

"Hope I didn't ruin the last thing you ever saw."

 

[Knife-28]

Knife wanders around city looking for Salt, before bumping into him outside an alley. "There you are man, I've been looking all over for you." He says, steering Salt back towards the markets, "So, what's with the sunnies?"

I browse the markets, fascinated by the exotic wares on sale.

 

[MinimanZombie]

Me and the demon girl-

"Little girl, what's your name?"

"Michelle."

Me and Michelle walk into the palace (I guess) and are led into a throne room (I guess), by butlers or something. A tall bearded fellow resides on a very regal and important looking chair. His clothes also look regal and important, and he wears a very expensive looking crown. He has a fairly long white beard, with scruffy grey hair. I decide to kneel.

"GREETINGS! Oh don't kneel, that's far to formal. You have returned my daughter after all! Now, for your rewards...those will be discussed after dinner. A feast shall be had! In your honor! "

"Thank you." The servants set up the food, and dining hall. I roam the palace, amazed by it.

 

[Saltarius]

"I...Knife, I'm blind."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"There's another guy in there. Have fun with him."

I walk out of the alley and turn a corner.
When I'm out of sight, I take off the cloak and voice changer, and double back to where I was before.
I walk over to Knife and Salt.
"What the hell happened?"

 

[Saltarius]

"What do you think? The bastard poured acid in my eyes and now I'm blind."

 

[Knife-28]

"I...oh shit man that's fucked."
"Wait, did you not think of killing yourself and respawning?"

 

[Saltarius]

"Knife, I don't know how but...I think this is permanent."

 

[Knife-28]

"What, did they use 'Bullshit Anti-Respawn Fixable Acid'?" Knife says, taking out his revolver and pressing it into Salt's hand. "What've you got to loose?"

 

[Saltarius]

"Knife, don't waste the bullet. Just, get me a walking stick or something and we'll be on our merry way."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Yeah, Knife. Just snap his neck or something. It'll attract less attention."

 

[Saltarius]

"No, I mean it's not going to fix anything. Heroes of Doom go blind anyways."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Actually, prophets go blind. Terezi and Sollux were both prophet-classes and they went blind, just like the blind prophets Terezi goes on about."

 

[Saltarius]

"Point is, I'm fucking blind. End of story. What a great Knight I'll be like this."

 

[Knife-28]

"Salt, I don't know whether your just incredibly lazy or stubborn." Knife says, "Fuck it, if you wanna be blind then fine, be my guest."
"Also what Trilby said."

 

[Saltarius]

"Fine, you want to see? Give me the honor."

I unload a shot in my head and respawn a few feet away. I pick up the sunglasses off my corpse and put them back on.

"See? Still blind."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Terezi... she was a Seer, right?" I ask nervously. "Uh... I need to go... somewhere."
I run off to find an optician.

 

[Saltarius]

"Right. Anyways, woop de fucking doo. Now I need a guide everywhere I go. Great. Just fucking great. Another reason to regret being such a dick on Gashog."

 

[Knife-28]

"Ah yes, karma is a cruel ***** at times." Knife says, "But look on the bright side, you can get one of those seeing eye dogs to lead you around."