Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Paddy the Second]

"I've always considered one, but there's the question of what kind of beard, and I've always had my face covered until now. Hmm, I may as well give it a shot."

I send Trilby a text.
MY PLAN IS TO WIN THE AUCTION! HOW THE FUCK IS THAT DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND? I'VE ALREADY EXPLAINED IT TO YOU BUT APPARENTLY WITHOUT EIGHT LEVELS OF MACHIAVELLIAN SUBTERFUGE IT'S JUST NOT A PLAN TO YOU!

 

[Saltarius]

"Trilby, I don't believe any of us ever held a shred of respect for you."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"I never thought you did. I'm a psychopathic, megalomaniacal, sarcastic, sadistic, offensive, demeaning asshat who would like nothing more than to beat the shit out of this auctioneer until he tells me where this thing is. It's out of frustration and a tiny amount of respect that I'm going to be fucking diplomatic."

 

[Saltarius]

"You ju-Did you really...Trilby, how you fucking function?

 

[Paddy the Second]

"You realise we could probably get him sectioned?"

 

[Saltarius]

"That's like number two on my list of things I want most right now. Don't you dare guess number one."

 

[Paddy the Second]

I clamp the phone to my shoulder with my head and pull a pen from my pocket. "I'm making a note on my wrist to get that done when we're finished."

 

[Saltarius]

"I'm hoping you mean the sectioning and not the other thing."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"The sectioning."

 

[Saltarius]

"Right. Good. Do that. And forget that I said it was number two."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Way ahead of you." I make another note further down my arm. It says 'Beard?'

 

[Saltarius]

"So...looks like you were serious about giving up the drugs."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I'm always serious except when I'm joking and I'm always joking except when I'm serious." Small beads of sweat form on skin and I shudder a little.

 

[Saltarius]

"...Right. So you ever thought of what you'd do if we ever got away from this whole 'Mall' deal? More so than we already have."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Keep on truckin' round the galaxy. Earth's gone completely to shit so there's no home to return to."

 

[Saltarius]

"But I mean like, settle down. Open up a business someplace. I dunno, live."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Ha! Did you ever wonder why I'm so happy about all this? It's a chance to get away from the normality earth would have forced upon us."

 

[Saltarius]

"I would welcome some normality after...everything."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Well ok, I admit I'd like a little R&R after all this, but I couldn't stand it forever."

 

[Saltarius]

"Granted, we've always had rather differing ideologies, you and I. Come to think of it, we'll probably be God Tier'd by the end of all this. Doubt we could look very normal."