All right, now look. Bioware chose the "conversation wheel" because by not giving ALL of the information about what you are about to say or do, it ensures that the conversations feel more dynamic than getting a few fully-spelled out options ripped straight from the script. I actually liked the conversation wheel better because I never liked having the impression that my character had pinched half of the fucking script, that just seems like too much of an advantage. And another thing, other people have mentioned Alpha Protocol. I actually got to see how a conversation worked in that game. Basically, there are four words or symbols indicating your options on their version of the "conversation wheel", and these options are based around the kind of EMOTIONAL outcome you want to convey through your character or to get out of the NPCs. Leaving you free to either A) keep your character locked in one of the emotional states FOREVER, or B) mix it up every now and then. This could actually make the conversations even MORE dynamic than those in Mass Effect.
And as to the original poster's problem with the reporter... well, there actually is a way that you can predict what the "shut up" option would've done. Okay, way back in the Eden Prime mission, do you remember running across two scientists hiding in a little shed? Yeah, and remember the one who had clearly gone insane? Did you ask about him (by hitting the "assistant" option within the "investigate" option? Well, after the first few lines of dialogue in that conversation branch, you get an option that says "I can shut him up", and if you select this option, you punch the mad scientist (no pun intended) in face, knocking him out cold. Notice the pattern here? In both instances, the "shut up" option ended with you punching someone in the face. And correct me if I'm wrong, I do believe that these are the ONLY places in the game that have a "shut up" option at all.
And as for how much control a player should have over his character in an RPG. I will agree that yes, you should have a fair amount of control over your character's actions (shoot at that prick, let the council die or save the council, that sort of thing), but you shouldn't be able to do EVERYTHING you want to in an RPG, otherwise, you, as the player, could kill the atmosphere and you would have no else but yourself to blame.