Michael Atkinson Facts

[NeoAC]

You know, there has been a lot of rage directed at the Attorney General of South Australia for his backwards policies on ratings on video games and movies, and his overall hatred of young people (especially when they are on his lawn), but what do we really know about Michael Atkinson? I think it's time all Escapists came together and shared some of the facts they know about the most hated man in the gaming community. I'll get things started with a couple.

- On the same day that Michael Atkinson was born (June 17th, 1958), a bridge collapsed in North Vancouver, British Columbia, killing 19 ironworkers. The official cause for the collapse was identified as God's rage over the fact that Mrs. Atkinson did not get an abortion.

- Michael Atkinson once tried to take a box of gummy bears from a 2 year old. He failed when the toddler broke his hand.

What else do we have?

EDIT: If you haven't gotten the point by now, this is basically like Chuck Norris Facts only instead of proving how awesome Chuck Norris is, it's been adapted to make fun of Michael Atkinson, so fire away all.

 

[CounterAttack]

Michael Atkinson once challenged Saxton Hale to a fistfight. Now Mr. Hale designs Mann Co. prototype weapons out of Atkinson's bones and teeth.

 

[Sporky111]

An assassin was once sent after Mr. Atkinson. Unfortunately, Altair was stopped at customs due to his M rating.

 

[CounterAttack]

Doomsday Arcade Episode 21:

This scene has been censored due to high level violence and an antiquated and ignorant understanding of modern culture.

 

[CloggedDonkey]

a man once yelled "fuck you ************!!!111oneoneone" in Atkinson's face, but he heard nothing as it was censored.

 

[TheSentinel]

Michael Atkinson once tried to ban real life for containing graphic violence and strong sexual content. It was rejected by one vote.

 

[CloggedDonkey]

someone once tolled Atkinson about a book that was very violent, very graphic, very sexual, and basically everything he doesn't like. when he tried to get it banned, he was then tolled it was the bible and sentenced the man who tolled him to death via stoning. it was pasted, but the prisoner escaped by hiding a knife in the bible they let him bring into the prison.

 

[NeoAC]

Michael Atkinson tried to ban the Teletubbies from Australia, because he was sure the antennas on top of their heads were for other purposes.

 

[CounterAttack]

Sometime in the not too distant future (February 2010):

Michael Atkinson tries to get into the Mana Bar, but the bouncer has a picture of him with the message: KILL ON SIGHT.

 

[Sporky111]

Once, Micheal Atkinson met Jack Thompson. Needless to say, the Terminator had to step in and change the course of history so that Skynet not have the knowledge of the worlds nuclear weapons censored.

 

[quillo]

(First post)

Michael Atkinson will be meeting the public and you're ALL INVITED!

http://img15.imageshack.us/img15/2757/img0189si.jpg

 

[NeoAC]

When Michael Atkinson watched "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" his heart actually shrank three sizes, because he was upset the Grinch was not wearing pants.

 

[Random Argument Man]

Mr Atkinson is part of the legion of doom and he wants to ban the Justice League.

 

[NeoAC]

Michael Atkinson tried to clearcut some brush on his estate, but unfortunately, the chainsaw he was going to use got banned, so he had to use a pair of safety scissors instead.

 

[mcpop9]

Michael Atkinson tried to save JFK but was banned just before he took the two bullets for JFK

 

[Sleekgiant]

Micheal Atkinson will not take a shower without holding a black bar to "censor" himself

 

[S.R.S.]

Michael Atkinson once tried to ban his parents from having sex it worked only because they didn't want another Michael Atkinson.

(Holy shit I just made that up just then! Am I a geniues or what?)

 

[oppp7]

Michael Atkinson's so fat that when he bans a game, the developers gain 10 pounds.
Michael Atkinson's so ugly that he censored his own face.
Michael Atkinson's so stupid that he cut his finger and thought that he himself was rated Mature.

 

[CheckD3]

Michael Atkinson is so evil, that he tried to ban hell so he could avoid being sent there

Michael Atkinson tries to ban video games because he was jumped by an NES controller one day and it took his wallet

Michael Atkinson is such an dick that he never sees his kids because he doesn't want them to see content deemed inappropriate for children

 

[NeoAC]

Michael Atkinson edited Hostel for Australian release. The result was just a 7 second clip of Eli Roth saying "New Zealand is Bad"