Microsoft marketing meeting, dated December 28, 2012. Names and titles redacted to protect the incompetant.
"And the last item on the agenda: How can we make E3 relevant again?"
"Introduce a new console?"
"Nahhh, Nintendo did that last year and we don't want to put pressure on R&D."
"Revive an old IP?"
"Nahhh, everybody does that."
"Realize that we're better off sinking our money into other forms of advertising?"
"Oh please, can we knock it off with the doomsaying?"
"The critics have figured it out. Hell, the public has figured it out. E3 has lost its market. We might as well just tack on a tech promo at the annual shareholders' meeting and have a media blitz each quarter. It's cheaper and has better targeted return."
"We've already committed to the outlay and besides, we'd look like shits if we backed out of the event now."
"Um...we could make an obscure reference to the event that we can say was taken out of context?"
"Now THAT works! Low cost and it doesn't do anything to our reputation that hasn't happened already."
"Sure, and we could use a countdown clock because our fanbase loves watching numbers move backwards."
"Super idea!"
"Uh, wait."
"Builds anticipation, gets the public excited again, makes them think they've discovered something when they figure out the clock hits zero on E3. I love it!"
"Oh, it is on now."
"Perfect catchphrase! We'll use that. All those in favour?"
"All opposed?"
"Motion carries. Okay, get Larry on the horn. We've got to have him put out the word. If we use a press release, we'll give the game away. Good meeting, people. See you next year!"
