Moral Question

[Sinclair Solutions]

Going by my own moral compass, I would do the honorable thing. Take her out. Do NOT let her drink alcohol. (I'm not sure where you live, but 16 is way too young to start drinking). Do not do anything you would regret. Do not try and kiss her or anything. Just have a good time, and don't pressure yourself into a inappropriate situation. She's 16, and that is too young to do anything stupid with her.

 

[Icaray]

In my opinion, this is not an issue of morality. She's of legal age so no one can say it's morally wrong. I think an age gap of four years is acceptable.
It all comes down to how mature she is.

Actually it can still be morally wrong, just not illegal.
I think its morally wrong to be involved with someone who is in a completely different stage of life and maturity than you are. 18-22 isn't so bad because the younger person has left school and assumedly has some knowledge of life in the real world. 16-20 has a teenager dating an adult. We give these stages of life different names for good reason.

Personally I think its morally wrong because its taking advantage of a younger person's lack of maturity and naivety even if they were the one to pursue the relationship.

Like I said, it all comes down to maturity. If whatever OP decides on doing involves taking advantage of her, then yes, it would be immoral.

 

[Lullabye]

well, it seems a little young, but physical age doesn't count for much at that stage in life. if she's too immature, i would say don't bother, but she is legal. so if you're looking to break a virgin heart, then go ahead........wow I think my moral compass is a little off too.

 

[Sinisterair]

Right, since my own moral compass is somewhat skewed, I figured I'd gauge reaction here.
Last night, a new girl started at work, she's funny, charming, beautiful, all in all a pretty great girl. She asked me if I'd like to go for a drink with her, and therin lies the rub. I am 20, she's 16. What do?

Dont let ppls bullshite get in the way of u being happy....DOOOO IT!

 

[duchaked]

i could be in your shoes
couldn't drink here
but she'd be legal-ish

 

[wordsmith]

Okay. Steer clear of the Jail Bait.

One: She might be over the legal age of consent but she is 16. You are 20. There is alot of maturing a person does in those four years.

Also think of it this way, certain countries think that a 20 year old sleeping with a 16 year old is an offense punishable by imprisonment.

Being as she's older than the age of consent, there's no "jailbait" to steer clear of. I think the bigger problem in all of this is that she's gonna be working with you. If it all goes OK, the company will likely move one of you to make sure you're not working in the same area. At worst, it goes messy and you've gotta go to work with that over your head. But hey, you only live once, right? Go for it

 

[JWW]

If she seems mature enough to make her own choice on this, then I see nothing immoral.

Illegal? Definitely. Personally, I prefer to put up with unnecessary laws if they don't get too ridiculous, rather than revolting against jaywalking. But I guess testing the legal system is up to you.

 

[BrownGaijin]

Morally four years isn't that bad. Legally, well what can I say that hasn't already been said.

I trust that you're picking up on the pattern...

 

[nicholaxxx]

if it''s legal, it's fine

underage drinking isn't that horrible of a thing, unless she wants you to sneak her into a bar in which case, it isn't worth it

 

[Guffe]

Well I think I would go (I am 19) the problem is she wouldn't be able to "go for a drink" in Finland since the age of getting into bars is 18. And I don't by stuff to under aged people which aren't meant for them, they can get it in other ways. I think if she asked I'd go...

 

[Gigano]

Since there's no question of legality, it all depends on the situation (how mature is she, are you her superior, how far would you take it, how soon etc.?) and your own personal ethical standards. As a point of departure, I for one don't think a four year age gap would matter here, but various circumstances may lead to a different result.

I've got one question to solve this.

If your sister was 16 would you want her going out with some one who is 20?

If the answer is yes or you don't have a problem with it then go for it.

If you would honestly say no, then don't touch it.

She is some ones daughter or sister man.

Sound advice if you want to stay 100 % on the right side of your own ethics. On the other hand, 100 % ethics isn't all there is to life.

 

[SimpleChimp]

Alright. This entire time i have been saying "don't do it", but in light of my imminent departure to go to military training i say;

Stop being a fuckin nancy and just give it to her already.

Case 1, it doesn't work out.

Case 2, you smash some pretty and legal Diego (as in San Diego, a Whale's Vagina)

Case 3, you decide not to do it and you always wonder what if. Stop wondering. Go Get Some

 

[sageoftruth]

if she was 24 and you 28 would it be such an issue ?

just for the sake of discussion whats the age gap between your mum and dad ?

because apparently the average age difference between married couples is 3.5 years just so you know . . .

It seems that as two people get older, the difference between them in terms of maturity shrinks, namely because as people run out of ways to develop, it takes longer and longer for them to mature in a new way. Forgive the RPG reference, but it is kind of like leveling up.

 

[Vlassic]

A lot of people are doubting it will last, but you can never really know going into any relationship whether it will last or not. Even brief relationships can be meaningful. Just don't treat her badly or manipulate her into doing anything she's not ready for, because she is very young, even though it's legal and everything.

I don't see any problem with it as long as you're prepared to treat her nicely.

 

[smurf_you]

I don't agree with adult and teenage relationships, even if sixteen is "adult" in your country, it still seems too young. She may be either confused or trying to take your cash. Why else would someone so young go for someone much older than her? It seems... like a trap.

but what about girls that are just attracted to older guys *coughs and points at self*

 

[Susan Arendt]

Morally, you're off the hook, but if you're smart, you'll steer clear. Dating coworkers is, generally speaking, a horrendously bad idea.

 

[Kais86]

Morally speaking it's not really an issue if it's legal where you live. Personally I would say "no" she's too young and I'm of the opinion that young people are stupid.

 

[Devil's Due]

I don't agree with adult and teenage relationships, even if sixteen is "adult" in your country, it still seems too young. She may be either confused or trying to take your cash. Why else would someone so young go for someone much older than her? It seems... like a trap.

but what about girls that are just attracted to older guys *coughs and points at self*

I don't mind that, I do mind teenage girls going for adult guys. It's your choice, but I'd never wish to be near the two again because it's against my morals. In the end, do what you feel like doing, but always remember at least someone is against it.

 

[Twilight_guy]

Invite a friend to go with you. You have decide if she has romantic feelings (Statutory rape in the US dude) or not (One more friend). The friend will act as a buffer if she oes have romantic feelings.

 

[emeraldrafael]

I'm goign to guess that your in a country where the legal drinking age is below 21, becuase already I see problems with both of your ages.

Anyway, In the US, the rule is if she is more then four years youngr then you, dont even bother with it. Now, knowing that, its up to you. If you'd liketo have a nice, non sexual relationship with her, then by all means, go ahead. Just remember, YOU are the ADULT, and it will be viewed as such, no matter how many times SHE SAYS to do something. However, if the relationship comes to sex, just dont. really, just, dont.

But thats just me.