My Ex-Girl Friend

[Dupeo]

Get a hotter girlfriend.

 

[JanatUrlich]

Just leave it. There's no point in aggravating someone who's probably just gonna get bored and leave you alone after a while.

 

[JoesshittyOs]

Cut contact, ignore them, let her learn the hard way.

This.

OT: There was one time I really wanted to go and fight a guy who had cheated on an ex of mine, but then I remembered that my ex was a giant ***** so there really would have been no reason.

 

[JoesshittyOs]

Whenever someone describes them self as a nice guy, and the other guy as a complete psychopath who the girl chose over them, I tend not to believe that person's side of the story.

So everyone you believe has to be the annoying modest type? Must be challenging.

 

[garfoldsomeoneelse]

I suggest you stop caring immediately and move on with your life, as it's in the best interest of absolutely everybody involved.

 

[emeraldrafael]

I dont think assaulting the guy is going to bring her back to you, but it may make you feel better.

still, I wouldnt advice it. just let it go.

 

[tobyornottoby]

And this is sadly relevant.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Fz3zFqLc3E&ob=av3n

But this too: http://mightygodking.com/index.php/2007/12/16/the-internet-nice-guy-rears-his-ugly-head-once-more/

 

[esperandote]

Get a better girlfriend in every way.

 

[MrLlamaLlama]

Honestly, and speaking from all - to recent experience; Take it as an opportunity to rejuvenate yourself, your life, your outlook and your goals. I spent a hell of a long time tying up everything I had into one girl and now that I've come to terms with the initial transition I'm a new man. I do all the stuff she'd have hated, got a tattoo, partied all night (properly) and sleep in on what would've been 'our day'. If this new guy's a dick, leave it for her to find out and just feel happy that you were better than stooping to violence, or resentment.

Seize the day, my brother.

 

[JoesshittyOs]

Whenever someone describes them self as a nice guy, and the other guy as a complete psychopath who the girl chose over them, I tend not to believe that person's side of the story.

So everyone you believe has to be the annoying modest type? Must be challenging.

People who describe themselves as nice seldom are. They're usually just passive aggressive.

And where does it say the two are mutually exclusive?

 

[irani_che]

move on, move on as fast as possible, go out, get a date, hell, a one nighter, get a good rebound sex on, dont even bother talking to her for a while, or even then in passing. If the douche still chases you for whatever reason tell him she aint worth it for you
Either, you will forget about her and move onto better. Or she will see you were fine about the break-up, that you are happier without her and therefore want to be back with you.

 

[Jesse Billingsley]

So my ex has dumped me for a jealous asshole who keeps threatening to "shut me up". So my question to you guys, Is it worth snapping and proving to her how bad of a move this was or is it best to be calm and let her learn how much a douche he is? If it helps i am a nice guy and im not just saying that plenty of people can back me up on this.

"I believe in learning on the job."

Just let her find out for herself. But in the meantime, you're single now, your options have just reopened, have at it!

But if she realizes her mistake, forgive her. And if you are single still, try and start over.

 

[Rin Little]

Let her learn the hard way not to go for assholes. If it was me, I'd completely forget about her and if she comes crawling back then too fucking bad.

 

[Jesse Billingsley]

Nah, let her find out what a bad decision she made.

If you are a nice guy, she'll come crawling back to you.

Not really. She will maybe find out what a bad decision she made in regards to her new boyfriend, but she won't come crawling back to him.

Why? Because attraction isn't a choice, and if she doesn't feel attraction for him any longer, then it's practically game over. She might be willing to reestablish a friendship with OP again, but their love-life is over.

Girls rarely feel attraction towards nice guys. They might have affection for them, but affection and attraction are two very different things.

I'm not sure that I agree with that. In my experiences, all girls are different. Some are attracted to sweet guys, some like dickheads who wear baseball hats that are too big for their heads, but most just like guys who have a good personality.

 

[Viral_Lola]

If she left you then that was her choice. Let it go and go out and meet new people.

 

[Athinira]

I'm not sure that I agree with that. In my experiences, all girls are different. Some are attracted to sweet guys, some like dickheads who wear baseball hats that are too big for their heads, but most just like guys who have a good personality.

That's why i said rarely. While some girls do indeed feel attraction towards nice guys, it is, however, the exception, not the rule.

Deep down beneath all our culture and individualism, human beings are still animals juts like every other species on the earth, and like animals, dominant males always gets their way with most of the females. And even when the nice guys eventually do end up with a girlfriend (or gets a fling going with a girl), the girl has a larger tendency to leave the guy at some point because he isn't providing what she really wants (and on a sidenote, chances are she doesn't realize what she wants), and he is also likely to have sex with her less often than a dominant guy (if he even gets any at all). OP is a perfect example of someone who had this happen to him, seeing as his girlfriend left him from a dominant (and rather aggressive) guy.

David DeAngelo, a famous dating guru, wrote this in one of his books:

I have read some interesting research that shows that women have a few main categories in their minds in which they slot men.
These are:
1) Not interested at all.
2) Interested as a friend.
3) Interested in a long-term relationship.
4) Interested in a sexual relationship.

Here?s the interesting part: If a woman sees a man as a good potential ?long-term? mate, she?ll usually hold back the sex. On the other hand, if she gets sexually involved with a man, she?ll usually still be open to a long-term relationship.
Most men who want sex make the mistake of doing things like taking women to dinner, buying them gifts, and being romantic. This behavior triggers the ?Hey, this guy is good long-term material? category in the woman?s mind, and they hold back sex. But if a man does things to turn a woman on earlier in the game and she gets sexually involved, he can choose where he wants the relationship to go.

^ That right there is pretty much the core part of the problem. "Nice guys" typically end up in zone 1-3, rarely in zone 4.

 

[JoesshittyOs]

They aren't mutually exclusive. Look at the lovely words I used such as 'seldom' and 'usually'. That would suggest to me that it's not infallible logic and that there could be exceptions to the rule.

But, people who profess to being nice, usually aren't.

Someone posted this link earlier, I think it's more than slightly fitting.

http://mightygodking.com/index.php/2007/12/16/the-internet-nice-guy-rears-his-ugly-head-once-more/

You know, that was actually rather enlightening. Thank you for this link. I've been thinking about it for the past few hours and it really did kind of make me want to try to burst out of my awkward bubble around people.