My Girlfriend Cheated on Me

[DigitalAtlas]

Dump her. Seriously, it means she has one foot out the door already. She doesn't feel guilty. She feels bad she got caught.

 

[Booze Zombie]

She feels guilty after kissing someone she probably found attractive (oh my God, you're not the only one!) and valued your relationship enough to to tell you and feel guilty about it. Jesus Christ, oh wow, how amazingly untrustworthy! MASSIVE SARCASM!

Jesus, I hate threads like this!

 

[Drake666]

*snip*

Impressive advices.
The OP should read it carefully

Question out of context: Are you a regular wiki poster ?

 

[Drake666]

She feels guilty after kissing someone she probably found attractive (oh my God, you're not the only one!) and valued your relationship enough to to tell you and feel guilty about it. Jesus Christ, oh wow, how amazingly untrustworthy! MASSIVE SARCASM!

Jesus, I hate threads like this!

Calm down man, the guy's young and need a lot of different point of views. The people on the Escapist are generally polite repliers...I can understand why he asked us (he can chose he's own path afterward...).

 

[gigastrike]

Geez, you're only dating. Dating is the time where people hang out with each other to see if they're good for each other. There is no real commitment. Why do people turn dating into such a big deal? it's not like you've actually decided to stay together forever yet or anything.

Also, she clearly regrets it if what you're saying is true.

 

[Drake666]

Pop some ritalin and rock back and forth in the fetal position while crying.

....

What? That's what I do when something doesn't go well. If you ignore a problem long and vigorously enough, it will eventually go away.

I like the way you think

 

[tehweave]

I found out this morning, from my girlfriend, that last night she let another guy kiss her.

Yeah I know...Only a kiss but she wanted it from another guy and I can't trust her anymore...She was so damn perfect too. We've only been together for 3 months and if this could happen while we are happy what will happen in a year...

What the fuck do I do?


Edit: I called her this morning and she told me. She feels guilty and wishes she could take it back but I have honestly been a great boyfriend. I pay for everything, drive her every where (she lives 40 minutes away from me by car), all her friends like me. I don't get angry, I don't hit her.

I SPOON HER EVERY NIGHT EVEN THOUGH I WAKE UP WITH A NUMB ARM! Like Jesus...

He's a friend of hers from work. He kissed her, she told me she could of stopped it but didn't.

I know it could be worse, I'm not an idiot but the fact that she did do it kind of destroys trust.


Every time she goes to talk to another guy what do I do? Believe in her like I did the first time? Is it possible to be in a happy relationship when every guy you meet is just another guy for her to hurt me with?

Also, I've never been jealous over her ex or male friends.

It was a "I like you kiss". Not old friends, not on the cheek.

She told me specifically that she can't be his friend because she would date him if I wasn't her boyfriend and that she wanted the kiss.



EDIT!:!:!:!:!: Thanks for the replies everyone. I really wish there was some miracle answer for this but as I guessed there isn't.

Its nice to see some people telling me I should get back with her.

I'm going to talk with her tonight. Try and sort it out...Who knows maybe I can get her to agree to a permanent leash?

That was a joke...I need one of those.

I realise there are people with much worse in their lives I just wanted some advice. I know it isn't the end of the world.

I hate to be cynical, but you have two options:

Get over yourself and stay with her. If she's as perfect as you say she is, you can look past this one indiscretion since it was just a kiss.

Dump her. If you let her get away with this one kiss, that one kiss might turn into two, might turn into a makeout session, might turn into sleeping with another guy.

Frankly, I'd take the second option, but like I said, I'm cynical.

 

[5mj7R7yf4Dwr3gdZyyu9PeGNwYjlNrjzuh3iTXQG]

Question out of context: Are you a regular wiki poster ?

TV Tropes, yes. Wikipedia, less so these days. [footnote]In the old days, less-than-perfect additions got polished by style fairies. These days, they just get reverted by the wiki-police.)[/footnote]

238U.

 

[Hitokiri_Gensai]

*hands a 9mm and a shovel* gogogogo! xD

joking aside, talk to her, but, in the end, the question is, can you really trust her after that? Honestly, i couldnt, ive been cheated on a couple times and i just never could give the girl my trust again afterwards.

 

[Krinku]

I would stay with her and try to build your relationship again. I mean she did tell you at least, which is commendable in itself. If you two aren't happy even after you try to build your relationship again I'd end it then.

 

[ScarlettRage]

Dump that *****.

Even if it was just a kiss, it was a stupid decision. That means she is prone to more.

TRUST ME.

Gonna have to agree here. And it could be a lot worse next time. If you feel you love her and can trust her.. Then whatever dude its up to you.

 

[alucards1hell]

Hey OP,

So she told you the morning after the incident happened? What prevented her from calling before? To be honest I would assume that she was probably a bit busy with this guy to call...
She has told you that she kissed him and enjoyed it, that's not the kind of thing that people who are happy in their relationships do.

I'm jumping on the dump her bandwagon here, you sound like a decent guy and I'm fed up seeing decent guys get f*cked by bitchy girls (note to girls, I don't mean that all of you are bitches, just that their are some who are bitchy)

hope you resolve the situation OP and all goes well!

 

[Booze Zombie]

Calm down man, the guy's young and need a lot of different point of views. The people on the Escapist are generally polite repliers...I can understand why he asked us (he can chose he's own path afterward...).

I know, but it seems the problem isn't really his, it's hers and he's focused on himself.
"I'm so loyal, I spent so much money on her, I did this, I did that..." DID YOU LET HER DO ANYTHING? It sounds like a very one-sided, "oh, he did everything, again..." sort of relationship, with what's I'm getting here.

If you respect someone, you let them solve the problems they can on their own and help them with the ones that they can't do alone. You don't remove all challenge and control from their life.

 

[Oinodaemon]

DUMP HER ASS!! Having been there (as the cheater...I'm not proud of that...) I can tell you conclusively that it will ALWAYS go farther unless she is able to cut ties with the person she kissed 100%.

 

[SilentCom]

Two options.

Forgive

Resent


Can you live without her? The choice is yours.

 

[Macgyvercas]

Crap, where the devil is Aylaine when you need her most. She would be the perfect person to ask about this.

As for me, I say give her another chance, as it was just a kiss. If it had gone farther than that, then you might have a real problem (not that you don't already, but you get my point).

LOL I know right?

Shes most likely bringing rainbows and sunshine to the world or something

True, but it leaves the Escapist somewhat darker and more dreary.

 

[templargunman]

Tell her how you feel, but don't get angry at her. She told you about it right away and feels bad about it. Ask her to tell the guy her situation, and if he's not a douche he'll stop trying to get with her. If she was perfect definitely don't let this ruin the relationship.

 

[Stasisesque]

I found out this morning, from my girlfriend, that last night she let another guy kiss her.

Yeah I know...Only a kiss but she wanted it from another guy and I can't trust her anymore...She was so damn perfect too. We've only been together for 3 months and if this could happen while we are happy what will happen in a year...

What the fuck do I do?


Edit: I called her this morning and she told me. She feels guilty and wishes she could take it back but I have honestly been a great boyfriend. I pay for everything, drive her every where (she lives 40 minutes away from me by car), all her friends like me. I don't get angry, I don't hit her.

I SPOON HER EVERY NIGHT EVEN THOUGH I WAKE UP WITH A NUMB ARM! Like Jesus...

He's a friend of hers from work. He kissed her, she told me she could of stopped it but didn't.

I know it could be worse, I'm not an idiot but the fact that she did do it kind of destroys trust.


Every time she goes to talk to another guy what do I do? Believe in her like I did the first time? Is it possible to be in a happy relationship when every guy you meet is just another guy for her to hurt me with?

Also, I've never been jealous over her ex or male friends.

It was a "I like you kiss". Not old friends, not on the cheek.

She told me specifically that she can't be his friend because she would date him if I wasn't her boyfriend and that she wanted the kiss.



EDIT!:!:!:!:!: Thanks for the replies everyone. I really wish there was some miracle answer for this but as I guessed there isn't.

Its nice to see some people telling me I should get back with her.

I'm going to talk with her tonight. Try and sort it out...Who knows maybe I can get her to agree to a permanent leash?

That was a joke...I need one of those.

I realise there are people with much worse in their lives I just wanted some advice. I know it isn't the end of the world.

Do not get back with her.

I cheated on my ex and... we don't change. Once a cheater, always a cheater. Don't get dragged into her world, she'll just make you miserable for the remainder of your relationship (which won't last long at all).

Sorry dude.

 

[Volkov]

Time to lay down the hurt.

 

[Spinozaad]

She only did what we all, deep inside, would love to.

You can hold that against her and adhere to a twisted moral and ethical code which helps no one. Physical pleasure can exist outside an intimate relationship. Call it 'assisted self-service', if you wish.

If she honestly regrets, make up. All she did was kiss, so what? Satisfying primal lust through watching porn is, on an abstract level, not all that different from having loveless sex. I don't know, and don't care if you watch porn, but know that only the truly innocent should cast the first stone.

Or you could dump her and move on. She's not The One, she's not irreplacable.