N+ for the Nintendo DS - A Baby Tea Review

[Baby Tea]

N+ - A 'third' review

Yes, it's actually time to look at a game that didn't come with Windows. 'But Baby Tea' you may query 'I thought your thing was reviewing free Windows games!' To which I would respond: 'Well, I only did two (Shameless plug). I don't think that means I have a 'thing' yet'

Besides, I just beat it today. What perfect timing!

I think I have discovered why the game is actually called 'N'. Because that is the only noise you'll be able to make as you're overcome by intense frustration and anger at the game, and yourself for flinging your DS across the room at that urn that holds what is left of poor old uncle Harold.

There is no story, no big evil bad guy to hunt, and no princess to save. There is you, some golden cubes, a switch, a door, and a sure-fire way to raise your blood pressure and make you consider domestic violence to ease your nerves.

So I've really driven home that the game is intensely frustrating. But why? Well because: You're playing this super ninja who has the ability to jump high, run fast, jump off walls, and even use momentum to run faster and jumper higher. But you also have to be a ninja in real life in order to pull this all off. Are the controls bad? No, they are actually ok. It's the level design. Hitler, Stalin, and Satan all came together in level design here, and you'll swear you can hear their laughter as you just barely touch that mine just before you get to the exit on a level that has taken you 40 minutes of exploding, falling, and getting zapped over and over again to just barely get this far. Is that a run on sentence? Give this game to an athsmatic kid with small lungs and even he'd be able to say that sentence with air left over.

And you know the worst part? You know exactly how to beat the level within 3 seconds of getting into it. But that doesn't matter. You see the button, you see the door, you see the route, and you see your sanity skip off to never never land wearing a pink poncho as mines, rockets, and lasers humiliate you in ways a middle school in the worst teen movie never could.

It actually came to the point, on some levels, that I wasn't even trying to win. I was just running, jumping, and fleeing for my very life. Who cared about the golden cubes or the time limit or the fact that you have unlimited lives? I was scrambling to merely live a few more seconds to spare anyone around me to further outbursts of what I'd like to do to N's mother.

I'm actually still in shock that I won the game, because I feel like every 'win' was a complete fluke, or proof of the existance of God. Because let me tell you: Without divine help, I'm not sure I could do half those levels again.

I will admit, however, that it's an excellent time killer. Load up a game, die a million times and get nowhere, and hey! Your bus is here. Sweet. Now you'll be pissed all day...but at least the wait seemed short.

The thing about N, is that it tricks you. It starts of so easy, you think this is actually possible, like taking a good looking girl on a date and she holds your hand and you think you might have a shot. And then, as the date progresses...the begins to squeeze your hand just a little. Then, by the end, she's beating you with a boat oar she somehow aquired, spraying you with mace, and yelling:

"ISN'T THIS FUN??"

--Baby Tea

 

[AeroZeppelinSevenfold]

Amazing review. Very funny too. I bought this game for the Xbox Live Arcade, and it is great to waste time with, but still hard like you said. I wish I had a DS to play it on, it would be a great time waster waiting for a bus or something.

 

[joystickjunki3]

Good review. I found myself grinning at a few points and agreeing w/ others.

 

[ZeroMachine]

Great review! My thoughts exactly. I remember playing this game when it was just released as a free flash game... after randomly seeing a box for the DS version in the store, I almost yelled "WHAT THE SHIT?" right in the middle of a group of little kids.

Great game, even if it does make even the happiest people want to punt puppies.

 

[Snotnarok]

Neat review, I have the game on Xbox live and I imagine the game might have some minor differences but I'm sure it's the same. I'd agree, you think the game is easy till you hit that one level that has a million views on youtube to get the solution how to beat it. With friends (360 ver, not sure if NDS has it) the game is a ton of fun because you might do a move that depends on your friend getting to the door because you're now in 50 pieces and he blows himself up making you do it again.

 

[Megacherv]

(Just gonna remind eveyone that there is a PSP version as well, practically the same as the DS version I think)

It's quite a coincidence, I start playing this again a few days ago and this review is then posted. I was bloomin' excited when I heard of N+, since I'd played N when I was younger and loved that, and I love this aswell. All I'm hoping for now is the PS3 version of the X360 version

 

[ultimatechance]

It was a great read, and quite hilarious too. However, it leans more towards ranting about it rather than actually reviewing it, which is fine in your case since you want yours to contain more humor.

 

[Andalusa]

I don't know if this is the same as or similar to the N game i've got for my PC or if it's like a sequal to the N game but that sounds about right.

 

[MaraN88]

Awsome review I have it myself but I never finished it. And I never will..

 

[Say Anything]

I don't know if this is the same as or similar to the N game i've got for my PC or if it's like a sequal to the N game but that sounds about right.

These games for the PSP and DS have what are to be called "enhanced" graphics and more levels, but I much prefer the PC plain/bland graphics to the choppy "enhanced" graphics of the other consoles.

For those who are interested but can't afford to drop $10-30 on a copy, you can download a very similar game here [http://www.thewayoftheninja.org/n.html] or play the Flash game online here. [http://www.mofunzone.com/online_games/n.shtml]

Anyway, great review as always Baby Tea. My only advice is to, sometime, choose a game with a little more depth to it. You're getting a great amount of review for what's available to you in the games you've chosen, but they're very simple and so your reviews are a little short.

 

[Andalusa]

I don't know if this is the same as or similar to the N game i've got for my PC or if it's like a sequal to the N game but that sounds about right.

These games for the PSP and DS have what are to be called "enhanced" graphics and more levels, but I much prefer the PC plain/bland graphics to the choppy "enhanced" graphics of the other consoles.

Anyway, for those who are interested but can't afford to drop $10-30 on a copy, you can download a very similar game here [http://www.thewayoftheninja.org/n.html] or play the Flash game online here. [http://www.mofunzone.com/online_games/n.shtml]

Anyway, great review as always Baby Tea. My only advice is to, sometime, choose a game with a little more depth to it. You're getting a great amount of review for what's available to you in the games you've chosen, but they're very simple and so your reviews are a little short.

Ah, that's the one I have. Thank you.

 

[Baby Tea]

Anyway, great review as always Baby Tea. My only advice is to, sometime, choose a game with a little more depth to it. You're getting a great amount of review for what's available to you in the games you've chosen, but they're very simple and so your reviews are a little short.

Thanks for the good word!

I hear what you're saying about the short reviews, and I certainly might try a review of a more 'deep' game in the future (I certainly play plenty of them). What I like about the 'simple' games, though, is that my reviews are short enough to be actually read by those who are just ready to type 'TL DR'. Also, simple games tend to have one or two 'shticks' that everyone can identify with that is easy to bring out in comedy.

Plus, it's pretty darn hard to keep said comedy up for a long period of time about one game, without it turning stale. This review, as an example, I thought was almost pushing it for length. There is only so many different ways I can say how frustrating the game is, after all.

But don't get me wrong: I totally hear what you're saying! I'd love to be able to pull off a more reviewy review (While still being funny) on a deeper game, and I'll certainly give it a shot at some point (Maybe sooner then later). Right now I'm just getting my 'review' legs and testing the reception of my style of comedy and writing.

 

[rolan7]

This is possibly the game I've spent the most time playing, if you count the PC version. The epitome of frustrating. I think I'm finally off it now, but it's still sitting on my hard drive and in my DS collection. Every time I play it I feel pretty good for a level or two, until I get to whatever level I CAN NOT defeat. Often it's the last level of the episode, meaning if I quit now I have to replay the previous 2-3 levels later.

Is that fake difficulty? No, I'd rather save that term for the "seekers" which *might* see you as you pass them at a 90 degree angle, apparently randomly. I asked about this in the official IRC, and found out they don't scan constantly, but rather scan at short periodic intervals. Since you can't tell when these scans are, it's up to random chance whether the seeker will turn and fry you when you jump over it. Oh, and machinegun drones at range are another exercise in luck-based gameplay.

And yet, I keep going back to play more. It's kinda sick, maybe I really am masochistic.

I like the graphics improvement in the DS version, and the dual-screen nature works a lot better than I expected it to. Don't forget they let you share levels through the wifi, I was pleasantly surprised (not that I can beat half the levels people post). The level design seemed generally "nicer" in the DS version, I was able to get farther than in the PC one, but wall-jumping off floating blocks is a *lot* harder.

 

[Peach_hat]

Good review. I might get this off of XBLA.

Still impresses me.

Don't, it doesn't hold a candle to the DS version.
Every time I died I found humor in it. Granted that most of my deaths were on purpose.


Oh yeah, review; nice professional touch, would scare the balls off someone with an actual dead uncle Harold and definitely had a personal touch which is what I like to see in user reviews.
It passes, even if I did disagree with most of you said.

 

[Nerdfury]

Top work. I've read all your reviews, and they're always impressive. There's something missing which I can't elaborate on since I really can't put it into words - possibly include more towards the technical side of the game? There's a bit of humour, which I like. And it's pretty thorough - but I wouldn't mind seeing more on the technical stuff; like game-play, controls, music, difficulty level, graphics, et al. Not that there's much to comment on with Minesweeper or N+

But still, I'm impressed. Especially so, considering the miasma of average crap being passed as reviews here sometimes!

 

[hippo24]

I love N+ and the DS version sounds like its no exception.

Keep up the good work, Nice high quality review.