Need advice on being normal

[DarklordKyo]

For some strange, arcane reason, I tend to think in blue and orange (as opposed to the black and white most people think in). It's hard to read peoples' tells unless it's as unsubtle as an anvil, and I tend to say stupid crap (that most wouldn't because of common sense) without knowing it, and I never know when I ever say something that's actually intelligent. Can anyone give me advice on being normal?

P.S. In case anyone comes to the conclusion that my parents want me to be normal, don't. They're perfectly fine with me the way I am generally (hell, my dad once claimed I'm the perfect son), I just want to know for my own betterment.

 

[Barbas]

*Shrugs* I 'unno. Most people who claim to be normal are only really normal to themselves and a small group of close-knit friends. I think if you see enough of the world, you realize what's considered the norm in one country is almost the polar opposite of what it would be in another country. Just focus on improving yourself and learning the lessons you think are worthwhile in life. If you worry too much about how others perceive you, you might not have much time left for yourself. And you can't please everybody.

I get that trouble when talking to people, though thankfully not as much as I used to. It's all about learning what you can from your mistakes and not being too hard on yourself for making them. It's far more important to let them temper you without becoming too cold or disappointed. What you've described is a problem that a lot of people have at one point or another in their lives, so take heart in the fact that you're in good company!

 

[Mezahmay]

My thoughts on your queries in order:

For some strange, arcane reason, I tend to think in blue and orange (as opposed to the black and white most people think in)

I can't imagine that comes up often in conversation. As long as you don't bring it up or lie and specify you had a thought in black and white, which normal people don't often consider noteworthy or devote critical thought to, you'll be fine.

It's hard to read peoples' tells unless it's as unsubtle as an anvil

Like poker tells or do you mean body language and vocal cues? Some elaboration would be helpful.

I tend to say stupid crap (that most wouldn't because of common sense) without knowing it

While I've never had that problem exactly, I do actively monitor my speech due to palilalia, an aphasia which prompts me to whisper the last couple to several syllables I said. These repetitions usually only happen once or twice but can go on a little longer and I rarely notice them as they happen. It's kind of annoying, but I combat it by thinking out what I say before I say anything and actively work to keep my mouth shut after I finish talking. It works surprisingly well at keeping sentences concise as well as no one bringing up the fact I repeat what I say throughout most of high school and college.

and I never know when I ever say something that's actually intelligent.

Intelligent how? I'm sure lots of people unintentionally say something clever or intelligent.

 

[Galletea]

There is no such thing as normal. People who think of themselves as normal are the people who are making do with lives that are less than they want, because they tell themselves that they are maintaining some kind of status quo, and shouldn't seek anything more.
People who think in black and white tend to be narrow minded, because most of the issues facing the world and the people in it are very much shades of grey, or someother murky colour not associated with porn literature.
Reading people is not an easy thing to do and it comes with experience. If you're a bit shy, getting that experience will take longer. Again common sense is experience, if you are inclined to speak your mind, then your friends will expect that.
If you're concerned about it, have you got a good friend you can talk to about it? It's all well and good asking the internet, but we can't really tell what you are like from a few lines, so if you can talk to someone who really knows you, then it might put your mind at ease.

 

[DarklordKyo]

I can't imagine that comes up often in conversation. As long as you don't bring it up or lie and specify you had a thought in black and white, which normal people don't often consider noteworthy or devote critical thought to, you'll be fine.

The whole blue and orange thing was an expression based on the following tvtropes entry (replace the whole morality aspect with a personality\thought process kind of thing, with the black and white part referring to the thought processes of normal people: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BlueAndOrangeMorality

Like poker tells or do you mean body language and vocal cues? Some elaboration would be helpful.

body language & vocal cues

 

[DarklordKyo]

There is no such thing as normal. People who think of themselves as normal are the people who are making do with lives that are less than they want, because they tell themselves that they are maintaining some kind of status quo, and shouldn't seek anything more.
People who think in black and white tend to be narrow minded, because most of the issues facing the world and the people in it are very much shades of grey, or someother murky colour not associated with porn literature.
Reading people is not an easy thing to do and it comes with experience. If you're a bit shy, getting that experience will take longer. Again common sense is experience, if you are inclined to speak your mind, then your friends will expect that.
If you're concerned about it, have you got a good friend you can talk to about it? It's all well and good asking the internet, but we can't really tell what you are like from a few lines, so if you can talk to someone who really knows you, then it might put your mind at ease.

Read one of my responses for clarification on the color-based wordplay. Also, the reason why I asked random people on a forum is to get unbiased answers to help me in a bit of a general way (if I ask friends, nine times out of ten they'll say I'm perfectly fine just because they're cool that way)

 

[Mezahmay]

The whole blue and orange thing was an expression based on the following tvtropes entry (replace the whole morality aspect with a personality\thought process kind of thing, with the black and white part referring to the thought processes of normal people: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BlueAndOrangeMorality

I am now beginning to comprehend your saying things without thinking issue. That is a rather esoteric, indirect way of saying you feel as though you think differently from "normal" people. If that example is the axis you choose to look at thought processes with, most "normal" people do not solely think in black and white. That's how the uneducated and extremists think. Most people consider problems and ideas from multiple facets. I feel as though I'm misunderstanding what makes a perceived atypical thought process seem like a problem or is something irregular. If you feel I did not capture the essence of what you are asking, please reply again and I will try to offer a more accurate response.

body language & vocal cues

Vocal cues are very different based on culture. There are several scholarly papers and studies that pursue such differences. However, most people learn through vocal cues through trial and error while growing up. Doing some quick research for links to something useful for American vocal cues is proving difficult. However, I am finding bits and pieces of useful information doing a search for "United States paralanguage".

It turns out paralanguage is the transmission of a meta message through nonverbal communication behind the literal meaning of spoken words and written sentences. Looking into this can provide you with all the information you could probably want regarding the nuances carried from a change in pitch or tone or word choice when someone speaks.

If you just want to learn more about body language, there are several resources that are much more accessible than paralanguage studies. Just little guides for many situations from sources like eHow and newspaper articles to, well, more studies.