Need Advice

Recommended Videos

Major_Sam

New member
Aug 27, 2008
903
0
0
I'm pathetic at talking to the opposite sex (males) and I thought some of you would be able to help me being a mostly male site. What do guys actually want in a girl?

I should in a coffee shop today, waiting for my coffee being made by the guy of my dreams and guess what I said? Nothing. And I hate myself for it.

What do you think I should do?
 

Scarecrow38

New member
Apr 17, 2008
693
0
0
Be yourself, have a friendly conversation. Most cliched advice ever I'll admit but that doesn't make it any less true. It's a start.
 

headshotcatcher

New member
Feb 27, 2009
1,687
0
0
Scarecrow38 said:
Be yourself, have a friendly conversation. Most cliched advice ever I'll admit but that doesn't make it any less true. It's a start.
Yeah, every guy is different and likes different things. Just be yourself and if he doesn't like that then don't bother.
 

JJDWilson

New member
Feb 25, 2008
100
0
0
madbird-valiant said:
MaxTheReaper said:
Every guy wants different things.
Some like aggressive girls, some like having to chase them, some are, well, gay.
You being a prime example.
Now that wasn't neccessary.

Though being a guy who enjoys both sides of the coin I still agree that everyone has different preferences,

I prefer not overt but not subtle hints, such as desiring physical closeness, the odd look, but also being obvious, don't freak out if he starts to reciprocate because that will just confuse him.
 

Major_Sam

New member
Aug 27, 2008
903
0
0
Samuel_of_Saruan said:
Don't do subtle.

Most males don't get subtle.
Now you mention it, I think thats true.

MaxTheReaper said:
Every guy wants different things.
Some like aggressive girls, some like having to chase them, some are, well, gay.
It makes it difficult not knowing. I think I also have a slight fear of rejection probably due to the lack of experience.

orangebandguy said:
I'd like someone to play splitscreen multiplayer with, but that's just me.
I would. :)
 

Horned Rat

New member
Feb 4, 2009
120
0
0
You need to find an environment you are comfortable in (this goes for you also Madbird). I'm crap house at talking to girls whether it's at EB Games, JB-HiFi or Starbucks. But front row at a Guns & Roses concert a few years ago I met a girl who I spoke to cause I was in an environment that was comfortable to me, got her number and we were together for about a year and a half. Met another girl friend at work, cause I had been there for so long (5 years) I was comfortable with myself there. It's the only time I've ever spoken to a girl randomly.

Retail is a terrible place to meet people unless you have brass balls. There are people behind you in line, people in the shop... all signs point to potential disaster. Are you comfortable at a concert? Bar? Club? Find somewhere where you are happy being you, if you're comfortable then you can talk to people, if you're not comfortable it will show and more often than not, you'll strike out.
 

twistedshadows

New member
Apr 26, 2009
905
0
0
Just be friendly. All the relationships I've had started out as friendships first.
Being a girl, I'm not entirely sure what guys want either, though. They're all different.
Forwardness (a skill I hopelessly lack) seems to work for many of my female friends.

madbird-valiant said:
MaxTheReaper said:
Every guy wants different things.
Some like aggressive girls, some like having to chase them, some are, well, gay.
You being a prime example.
I don't think you've been ruled out quite yet, yourself.

MaxTheReaper said:
Why yes, I do love the aggressive ladies.
I thought you said you didn't love any of the ladies.
 

Caliostro

Headhunter
Jan 23, 2008
3,253
0
0
Samuel_of_Saruan said:
Don't do subtle.

Most males don't get subtle.
This.


This isn't so much a "guy thing" as it is women's version of "subtle" implies mind reading as a necessary skill.

"HOW DID YOU NOT GET I WANTED SEX? I DID THE SHOULDER THING!"

"... What? What shoulder thing...?"

"THIS!"

"...the fuck is that?"


That said, don't just walk up to him "Hi! I want you.", cause that's just creepy... Just walk over, say hi, if you wanna be flirty might wanna mention he's cute or something and try to get his contact... ask about stuff he likes, tell him about stuff you like.

A good way to steer the conversation that way is to pick any of his interests or qualities and go "bet your gf loves that uh?", that way you also get to know if he has a girlfriend or not. If he says "oh I don't have a gf", you're in! If he says "yeah, she does", you just spared yourself a mess!
 

Horned Rat

New member
Feb 4, 2009
120
0
0
Caliostro said:
Samuel_of_Saruan said:
Don't do subtle.

Most males don't get subtle.
This.


This isn't so much a "guy thing" as it is women's version of "subtle" implies mind reading as a necessary skill.

"HOW DID YOU NOT GET I WANTED SEX? I DID THE SHOULDER THING!"

"... What? What shoulder thing...?"

"THIS!"

"...the fuck is that?"


That said, don't just walk up to him "Hi! I want you.", cause that's just creepy... Just walk over, say hi, if you wanna be flirty might wanna mention he's cute or something and try to get his contact... ask about stuff he likes, tell him about stuff you like.

A good way to steer the conversation that way is to pick any of his interests or qualities and go "bet your gf loves that uh?", that way you also get to know if he has a girlfriend or not. If he says "oh I don't have a gf", you're in! If he says "yeah, she does", you just spared yourself a mess!
Totally agree with the shoulder thing... I've been there. I regularly tell my girlfriend that she must remember I am not psychic.

Tell him he's cute? Short answer, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Someone did this to me once after saying hi randomly, ended the conversation right there. I was really uncomfortable. Flattered but I don't know this person.

The, "I bet your gf likes that", thing... I do that too. Works well to subtly find out the info.
 

A Raging Emo

New member
Apr 14, 2009
1,844
0
0
It really isn't that hard to talk to people.

I went to see the new Star Trek movie yesterday. The woman at the counter where we bought our tickets was quite attractive, so I just went up, read her name badge and sai "Hi Emily! Nice to meet you!".

She was quite embarassed.
 

Major_Sam

New member
Aug 27, 2008
903
0
0
Horned Rat said:
You need to find an environment you are comfortable in (this goes for you also Madbird). I'm crap house at talking to girls whether it's at EB Games, JB-HiFi or Starbucks. But front row at a Guns & Roses concert a few years ago I met a girl who I spoke to cause I was in an environment that was comfortable to me, got her number and we were together for about a year and a half. Met another girl friend at work, cause I had been there for so long (5 years) I was comfortable with myself there. It's the only time I've ever spoken to a girl randomly.

Retail is a terrible place to meet people unless you have brass balls. There are people behind you in line, people in the shop... all signs point to potential disaster. Are you comfortable at a concert? Bar? Club? Find somewhere where you are happy being you, if you're comfortable then you can talk to people, if you're not comfortable it will show and more often than not, you'll strike out.
Thats how I would do it cept my town lacks places to mingle with people who share my interests. Where does a pretty, gaming, science fiction breathing, arrow shooting chick go to meet people? Where could I meet people such as yourselves?
 

wolffour

New member
Mar 28, 2009
49
0
0
Start to talk to him and then find out wot he likes and go on that

If he likes games talk to him about that.
 

Chipperz

New member
Apr 27, 2009
2,593
0
0
I'm just gonna echo the "talk to him" and "Oh, so does your girlfriend like that?" tactics. They work really, really well.

On another note, I've found a great way of conditioning women out of 'subtlety'/insanity. I take everything they say as gospel truth, and do whatever they tell me to to the letter. Eventually, even the most stubborn woman starts saying what she actually means!
 

Daveman

has tits and is on fire
Jan 8, 2009
4,201
0
0
Me I'm waiting for somebody cute who at least doesn't laugh at me when I talk about all my nerd shit. Then on top of that it would be nice for them to like good metal, not shit metal, that attracts a certain kind of person I try to avoid. Other than that I'm pretty easy.
 

NotAPie

Elite Member
Jan 19, 2009
2,095
0
41
Just say Hi, and create a conversation with the guy.
>.> Also, don't hate yourself for not saying anything, its happend to everyone, still its a bad feeling but dont hate yourself for it :3
 

Major_Sam

New member
Aug 27, 2008
903
0
0
Daveman said:
Me I'm waiting for somebody cute who at least doesn't laugh at me when I talk about all my nerd shit. Then on top of that it would be nice for them to like good metal, not shit metal, that attracts a certain kind of person I try to avoid. Other than that I'm pretty easy.
See there is my problem again. There are plently of guys out that who would like to talk about that sort of stuff and I will! I would love for someone to talk nerdy to me. If they didn't, I would be disappointed. There is things I can do to achieve that but I need more guts. I need to stop blushing like crazy, saying muddle sentences and running away.