Need ideas for bothering father

[InnerRebellion]

So my dad is out for the night with his friends. I texted him about Robert Pattinson playing Kurt Cobain and his response was "You just made 7 men collectively groan!!!" and my response was "I can make 7 men giggle. (long space) Boobies." His response? "It worked good job."

Now I know there are some funny people here. Someone give me some REASONABLE ideas to make him and his friends react. Keep in mind I'm 14.

 

[xHipaboo420x]

Tell him you're on fire. That should illicit some response.

 

[Julianking93]

One I use is "You know what's funny?"

"What"

".....vagina"

I don't know why, but that seems to make people laugh.

 

[TheNumber1Zero]

"Happiness goes great with Gnome Blood"

What?! I would think it was funny.

 

[InnerRebellion]

Oh, and an add-on. He's extremely sarcastic, and loves to twist jokes on me.

 

[TheNumber1Zero]

Someone I know laughs when I tell them paint dries.

I literally just Chuckled at "Paint Dries"

 

[Berethond]

First you say: "Ask me if I'm an orange."

Then he says: "Are you an orange?"

Then you say: "No."

With as straight a face as is humanly possible.

 

[TheFacelessOne]

"Pssst...I found you porn collection. Momma's gonna hear 'bout it."

Several minutes later...

"Hey, dad, is it okay if I ejected some white stuff on your pictures?"

 

[Hazy]

"Hey, is that [important item X] supposed to be on fire?"

 

[InnerRebellion]

"Hey, is that [important item X] supposed to be on fire?"

Asked him "Is it a good thing if the computer is on fire? Mom wants to know if Norton can fix that."

 

[Hazy]

"Hey, is that [important item X] supposed to be on fire?"

Asked him "Is it a good thing if the computer is on fire? Mom wants to know if Norton can fix that."

Then tell him some big guy with a beard is looking to score some coke.
He came to the front door in a fit of rage.
You're letting him spend the night.

 

[Guy32]

"Oh ya, you might need to start saving up, say, about $27,000. You'll understand when you get home."

Don't respond to the next 7 texts he sends.

 

[Trifixion]

Assuming you're still texting, send him one that reads:

WE HAVE THE KID. GET TEN GRAND IN SMALL BILLS AND LEAVE IT IN THE TRASH BIN OUTSIDE THE CONVENIENCE STORE ON (pick a street intersection where there is one) BY MIDNIGHT OR WE START MAILING YOU BODY PARTS ONCE AN HOUR.

Then hide somewhere in the house. And be sure you don't answer the phone when it rings.

 

[InnerRebellion]

Assuming you're still texting, send him one that reads:

WE HAVE THE KID. GET TEN GRAND IN SMALL BILLS AND LEAVE IT IN THE TRASH BIN OUTSIDE THE CONVENIENCE STORE ON (pick a street intersection where there is one) BY MIDNIGHT OR WE START MAILING YOU BODY PARTS ONCE AN HOUR.

Then hide somewhere in the house. And be sure you don't answer the phone when it rings.

He'd respond "Good, one less annoying teenager." He's sarcastic like that.

 

[Tharwen]

You're fourteen?

Try this:

 

[Anarchemitis]

Remind him that although difficult to believe, the 70s did actually occur.

 

[saintchristopher]

Ask him how he's doing. If he responds with "alive," he's doing better than my dad.

 

[Vitor Goncalves]

"Happiness goes great with Gnome Blood"

What?! I would think it was funny.

Damn you, that almost makes me ressurect my WoW account and use my orc warlock to chase the little buggers and do the most cruel things to them. XD