Need Relationship Advice.

craftomega

New member
May 4, 2011
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My girlfriend and I (Lets call her Jenny), have been together on and off for about 8 years now. To be blunt I have beed a bad boyfriend in the past, I have treater her badly (Nothing violent or abusive), and yet she is still in completely love with me.

The problem is that I need my space, I dont really want sex all that much, and she well... She wants to see me all the time and ALWAYS wants sex.

Now she is a sensitive person, and she loves me more then I deserve, an I love her in my own way. But I cant seem to find a way to tell her to back off. Or even if I should. She is going through some bad stuff, she is litterly getting dumber and doctors cant find out why (She has an IQ of 153).

I just dont know what to do. I want to treat her right, but I also want my space.
 

JesterRaiin

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Apr 14, 2009
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craftomega said:
I just dont know what to do. I want to treat her right, but I also want my space.
Honesty. There is no better way.
You may choose the way you'll try to express your feelings, but really, the more you're beating around the bush, the worse it gets.

I get the impression you're not exactly the best example of Romeo to Juliette, so maybe it's really not about space or closeness, but you - trying to escape this relationship ? Please think about it.
 

Scarblade

Beta testing life since 1991
Jan 26, 2011
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Well this is a tricky and awful one with her condition, but never the less. I have never appreciated living a life by conforming to others needs, and I don't think you will be doing her a favor by staying with her if you don't want to. Risks are that you will treat her poorly, and you won't get the space you need.

So try to figure out what you want the most, do you want to stay with her for her sake, or do you want your space?

About the sex: Maybe she thinks she is supposed to want sex all the time, because you are a boy, and a boy can only love a girl if she wants to have sex all the time (irony). Seriously, if she isn't that smart she might have been influenced by media to think that sex is the only way to make you love her. Try to explain to her that you like being with her (if you do) without having sex.
 

craftomega

New member
May 4, 2011
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Scarblade said:
Well this is a tricky and awful one with her condition, but never the less. I have never appreciated living a life by conforming to others needs, and I don't think you will be doing her a favor by staying with her if you don't want to. Risks are that you will treat her poorly, and you won't get the space you need.

So try to figure out what you want the most, do you want to stay with her for her sake, or do you want your space?

About the sex: Maybe she thinks she is supposed to want sex all the time, because you are a boy, and a boy can only love a girl if she wants to have sex all the time (irony). Seriously, if she isn't that smart she might have been influenced by media to think that sex is the only way to make you love her. Try to explain to her that you like being with her (if you do) without having sex.
Thank you for the advice and i agree i do need to decide, but on the sex part.... its because she loves having sex with me im the only guy she has ever been with.
 

Phasmal

Sailor Jupiter Woman
Jun 10, 2011
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Scarblade said:
About the sex: Maybe she thinks she is supposed to want sex all the time, because you are a boy, and a boy can only love a girl if she wants to have sex all the time (irony). Seriously, if she isn't that smart she might have been influenced by media to think that sex is the only way to make you love her. Try to explain to her that you like being with her (if you do) without having sex.
*snerk*

Or maybe she just likes sex?
Women do like it too, you know.
I've had a higher sex drive than my partner in the past.

As for the OP:
You need to decide what you want from this relationship, if you want it to continue. If you want space, try and only see her a few times a week. Or if you're feeling smothered, talk to her.